Thoughts thoughts thoughts in my head
It has been quite some time since I made an entry that was, like, journal-y and not OMG THIS IS MY LIFE-y. So while I'm sitting here with facebook open in another tab hoping Patrice Maktav looks down and sees my little avatar glowing and online-y and stuff amidst his three thousand facebook friends and then decides he wants to say something to me, I shall record some thoughts.
THOUGHT ABOUT LES MISÉRABLES.
I was like thirty minutes late to class the other day, as usual, but it was particularly bad this time because we had an exam and I happened to walk in a few minutes after she collected it. Pffft. And then I was like, Well at least I'll learn SOMETHING in the remaining hour and a half. Joke's on me, because then she passed out a passage from some French novel called less miserable or something and we had to read about some church guy giving candlesticks to some prison guy. At least I wowed everyone by being able to rattle off the bishop's full name or whatever.
It got me thinking though and I totally had a revelation! It might be a naw dip moment for the people who still play in the LM fandom, but I am slow and never picked up on this.
The scene where Montparnasse fails at robbing Valjean? Is an echo of the scene where Valjean fails at robbing the bishop. It goes down almost the exact same way with the old dude hiding a surprise (mega strength for one, mega power for the other in that he's actually a bishop and not a curé), the young guy getting preached at (Valjean got the better end of the stick in this regard), and then the would-be robber being given what it was he wanted to steal. The difference? After Valjean reflects, he becomes a super saint. After Montparnasse reflects, he's like WHATEVS BRING ME ANOTHER HOOKER.
Anyway, I'm sure we could deeply analyse why the conversion worked for Valjean and not Montparnasse but I have a really short attention span.
FRENCH
When I am at the stage door, I can just GO OFF in French with the French fans. Sure it's not perfect, but I can at least pretend to be confident. Plus I've been posting a lot more on the MOR forum and since all the people who care about the MOR aspect of my life are French, I do most of my facebooking in French. I first realised I had this power in Lille. I don't remember transitioning from the awkward American who was ashamed to say a sentence into a MOR groupie whose Sorbonne professor told her "Vous avez bien maitrisé la langue!" even after she showed up to class forty-five minutes late for the third time that week. In Bruxelles I didn't speak English all day (except twice on the train to Flo) and ever since I've found myself thinking in French here and there. In fact, I have a class taught in English this semester, and for the midterm we had to do an essay, and TWICE I got pissed because there was a phrase I wanted to put in French and I couldn't figure out how to say it as gracefully in English. I mean, it's been a full year since I had classes taught in English, so it just seems weird to do homework and essays and stuff in anything but French. It's like English is the cheater language that you speak when you're being crude and lazy or something.
FLO VS. MAKTAV
This is a weird thing. Since Maktav stole me from Flo one week ago, I have been slowly returning to normalcy... or at least, the closest thing to normalcy that one could ever hope for from me. I realised that I had been listening to the same twenty songs over and over for the past few months and I put all my other songs back in my iTunes--Cali, Take That, the PRC, Máté, The Ark, Repo... it was like some kind of beautiful family reunion! Plus I no longer roll around my room being like FLOOOO DOESN'T LOVE YOOUUUUU HE'S GOING TO MOVE TO AMERICAAA WITH MEEEE or whatever was going on in my twisted brain.
I don't love Maktav in like a creepily gazing at pictures of him kind of way, but in a OMG SQUEE I WANT TO GIVE YOU A HUG kind of way. I want to go to Cardiff with him and geek out in French and hear him pronounce "Raxicoricofallapatorious" with a French accent. Or even "Harkness" actually. Dang I gotta talk about this stuff to him to his face just to hear how he's saying it. It will be SO CUTE. I can't wait to give him that hat.
However as I rebound away from Flo I find myself being hard on him. It's what happens when I come off an intense crush. And then I feel bad, because it's not Flo's fault that I'm leaving him! He was the same this past weekend as always! He even admitted he loves me and he's smiling HUGELY in one of my Flotos. It's just that I saw people whose behaviour was even more excellent and put Flo into a different perspective. I mean, I understand that Flo doesn't think he could hang with me the way Maktav did because Flo would expect girls to jump all over him or something. But the thing is, Mikele was hanging with the girls at the hotel door that night. He just sort of chatted and showed off and everyone was delighted by him. He did not get molested or harmed in any way. In fact, he seemed to enjoy himself. But we all know Flo would NEVER do something like this. He's no fun. I mean, okay fine he has personal boundaries and he's incredibly shy but like. It is not good for me to pine over a human and convince myself that it might lead to ANYTHING more than his hand on my shoulder when we take a picture.
And with Maktav, I don't really want anything more than for him to be nice to me and to care about me. And I mean CLEARLY that is already happening. He is SO NICE and he's the one who started our first facebook chat and asked if I got home okay! HE ASKED IF I GOT HOME OKAY. I'm not just a slightly-paler face in a crowd of screaming fangirls to Maktav. He knows my name, he talks to me on facebook, he helps me hand out dolls to the rest of the cast... it's like he needs love and I am basically a human bundle of obsessiveness that needs something to latch onto. What a perfect fangirl/celebrity relationship!
Anyway I have lost my train of thought.
Can anyone help me think of a catchy and preferrably punny name for my future knitting enterprise? I got nothing.
THOUGHT ABOUT LES MISÉRABLES.
I was like thirty minutes late to class the other day, as usual, but it was particularly bad this time because we had an exam and I happened to walk in a few minutes after she collected it. Pffft. And then I was like, Well at least I'll learn SOMETHING in the remaining hour and a half. Joke's on me, because then she passed out a passage from some French novel called less miserable or something and we had to read about some church guy giving candlesticks to some prison guy. At least I wowed everyone by being able to rattle off the bishop's full name or whatever.
It got me thinking though and I totally had a revelation! It might be a naw dip moment for the people who still play in the LM fandom, but I am slow and never picked up on this.
The scene where Montparnasse fails at robbing Valjean? Is an echo of the scene where Valjean fails at robbing the bishop. It goes down almost the exact same way with the old dude hiding a surprise (mega strength for one, mega power for the other in that he's actually a bishop and not a curé), the young guy getting preached at (Valjean got the better end of the stick in this regard), and then the would-be robber being given what it was he wanted to steal. The difference? After Valjean reflects, he becomes a super saint. After Montparnasse reflects, he's like WHATEVS BRING ME ANOTHER HOOKER.
Anyway, I'm sure we could deeply analyse why the conversion worked for Valjean and not Montparnasse but I have a really short attention span.
FRENCH
When I am at the stage door, I can just GO OFF in French with the French fans. Sure it's not perfect, but I can at least pretend to be confident. Plus I've been posting a lot more on the MOR forum and since all the people who care about the MOR aspect of my life are French, I do most of my facebooking in French. I first realised I had this power in Lille. I don't remember transitioning from the awkward American who was ashamed to say a sentence into a MOR groupie whose Sorbonne professor told her "Vous avez bien maitrisé la langue!" even after she showed up to class forty-five minutes late for the third time that week. In Bruxelles I didn't speak English all day (except twice on the train to Flo) and ever since I've found myself thinking in French here and there. In fact, I have a class taught in English this semester, and for the midterm we had to do an essay, and TWICE I got pissed because there was a phrase I wanted to put in French and I couldn't figure out how to say it as gracefully in English. I mean, it's been a full year since I had classes taught in English, so it just seems weird to do homework and essays and stuff in anything but French. It's like English is the cheater language that you speak when you're being crude and lazy or something.
FLO VS. MAKTAV
This is a weird thing. Since Maktav stole me from Flo one week ago, I have been slowly returning to normalcy... or at least, the closest thing to normalcy that one could ever hope for from me. I realised that I had been listening to the same twenty songs over and over for the past few months and I put all my other songs back in my iTunes--Cali, Take That, the PRC, Máté, The Ark, Repo... it was like some kind of beautiful family reunion! Plus I no longer roll around my room being like FLOOOO DOESN'T LOVE YOOUUUUU HE'S GOING TO MOVE TO AMERICAAA WITH MEEEE or whatever was going on in my twisted brain.
I don't love Maktav in like a creepily gazing at pictures of him kind of way, but in a OMG SQUEE I WANT TO GIVE YOU A HUG kind of way. I want to go to Cardiff with him and geek out in French and hear him pronounce "Raxicoricofallapatorious" with a French accent. Or even "Harkness" actually. Dang I gotta talk about this stuff to him to his face just to hear how he's saying it. It will be SO CUTE. I can't wait to give him that hat.
However as I rebound away from Flo I find myself being hard on him. It's what happens when I come off an intense crush. And then I feel bad, because it's not Flo's fault that I'm leaving him! He was the same this past weekend as always! He even admitted he loves me and he's smiling HUGELY in one of my Flotos. It's just that I saw people whose behaviour was even more excellent and put Flo into a different perspective. I mean, I understand that Flo doesn't think he could hang with me the way Maktav did because Flo would expect girls to jump all over him or something. But the thing is, Mikele was hanging with the girls at the hotel door that night. He just sort of chatted and showed off and everyone was delighted by him. He did not get molested or harmed in any way. In fact, he seemed to enjoy himself. But we all know Flo would NEVER do something like this. He's no fun. I mean, okay fine he has personal boundaries and he's incredibly shy but like. It is not good for me to pine over a human and convince myself that it might lead to ANYTHING more than his hand on my shoulder when we take a picture.
And with Maktav, I don't really want anything more than for him to be nice to me and to care about me. And I mean CLEARLY that is already happening. He is SO NICE and he's the one who started our first facebook chat and asked if I got home okay! HE ASKED IF I GOT HOME OKAY. I'm not just a slightly-paler face in a crowd of screaming fangirls to Maktav. He knows my name, he talks to me on facebook, he helps me hand out dolls to the rest of the cast... it's like he needs love and I am basically a human bundle of obsessiveness that needs something to latch onto. What a perfect fangirl/celebrity relationship!
Anyway I have lost my train of thought.
Can anyone help me think of a catchy and preferrably punny name for my future knitting enterprise? I got nothing.