SIR, this is NOT a WHORE HOUSE!!!!
i'm feeling very ready. for something. what? i don't know. to move on with my life, maybe?
it has been six months now that i have been stuck in neutral. going to work just enough to keep what all respectable citizens need to own, supporting outrageous drug habits, and keeping food on the table.
i never left the house much. not because i couldn't, but because i had no need, and most importantly, no desire. all my friends came to visit me, delivered anything i asked them to, and that was that. i was never delusional about the situation, i understood perfectly what "the deal" was on levels much deeper than i would ever care to discuss in this livejournal, much less out loud. no, not because its private, only it's complicated and would take up more time than it's worth.
now, i'm not saying that i'm quitting drugs, or anything stupid like that. THAT would be delusional. no, they just are no longer number one on my list of priorities. it's no longer right for me. during that point in time, yes, i just needed to say fuck everything, i can spend my money on useless things all i want and there is nothing you can do to stop me i love drugs yum yum yum... and that candy bar too... and those Manolo's!!! do you think kfc is still open..?
so. right. the present and future. i have made a few goals for myself, and i will say them now to all of you, whoever that may be, because then. um. you can mercilessly harangue me if i do not follow through. or not. but the threat is there, and that's enough for me.
1. put $500 a week into savings account (more if possible, but don't beat self up if not)
2. go to work more than one day a week, and on time! 4-5 would be optimal.
3. begin windsor pilates... the infomercial, very inspirational
and that's about it.
i miss chris. what can i say, can't live with him, can't live without him. i love him....
it has been six months now that i have been stuck in neutral. going to work just enough to keep what all respectable citizens need to own, supporting outrageous drug habits, and keeping food on the table.
i never left the house much. not because i couldn't, but because i had no need, and most importantly, no desire. all my friends came to visit me, delivered anything i asked them to, and that was that. i was never delusional about the situation, i understood perfectly what "the deal" was on levels much deeper than i would ever care to discuss in this livejournal, much less out loud. no, not because its private, only it's complicated and would take up more time than it's worth.
now, i'm not saying that i'm quitting drugs, or anything stupid like that. THAT would be delusional. no, they just are no longer number one on my list of priorities. it's no longer right for me. during that point in time, yes, i just needed to say fuck everything, i can spend my money on useless things all i want and there is nothing you can do to stop me i love drugs yum yum yum... and that candy bar too... and those Manolo's!!! do you think kfc is still open..?
so. right. the present and future. i have made a few goals for myself, and i will say them now to all of you, whoever that may be, because then. um. you can mercilessly harangue me if i do not follow through. or not. but the threat is there, and that's enough for me.
1. put $500 a week into savings account (more if possible, but don't beat self up if not)
2. go to work more than one day a week, and on time! 4-5 would be optimal.
3. begin windsor pilates... the infomercial, very inspirational
and that's about it.
i miss chris. what can i say, can't live with him, can't live without him. i love him....