He said the biggest issue he's had so far is that people see asexuality as a temporary state of mind, and that it's an affliction you eventually 'get over' because they can't really comprehend your lack of desire for sexual contact. It's not that sex doesn't feel good, the urge to have it simply isn't there. I get it on a lot of levels (lol pansexuality + distrust of me = BOO for me because I still they they are super hot but I cannot and will not have sex with them anymore this makes having boyfriends very difficult tl;dr I am crazy :< ), but it's still not something I completely comprehend. I like sex. I like what it does to a relationship on my end, personally, so I have a hard time imagining a relationship without sex (which is why I identify as gay even though I'm not-- it's just easier for me to weed out the dudes emotionally because there's a step there I can't take that I would very much LIKE TO TAKE). He's with a guy right now and they've been together about two years. The boyfriend isn't asexual but they're 'dealing with it'. I'm not sure how as I don't exactly ask my cousin about his sex life all that often, but I know they aren't completely abstaining. The boyfriend dislikes anal sex (from either top/bottom perspective) so I think that has a lot to do with it.
I guess some people find that 'WILL THEY GET BACK TOGETHER, WILL THEY NOT' thing fascinating but idk. it depends on the couple for me. I think after a while if the show goes out of its way to show you a couple doesn't work I don't wanna hear about it anymore, but at the same time people are naive and dumb and will jump back into bad/non-working relationships so it's not really that weird for it to happen on tv. it's just annoying seeing it from a third person perspective because it's like 'YOU TRIED THIS ALREADY STOP THAT' but PEOPLE ARE SILLY.
It's actually one of the issues I have with Sheldon/Penny as a couple - I don't think his apparent asexuality is just going to go away. And I do think that a lot of other people mostly consider asexuality to be a "phase" (which is partly why I don't think I fit in the asexuality spectrum - I'm sort of a prude, but I definitely have desires. i might not be super comfortable with sex stuff, but i still have an interest in it... it just tends to be a more private interest.)
You aren't crazy! I definitely understand where you're coming from in your relationships with dudes. On the up side... at least you think ladies are pretty sweet too? But that's still suckish to be into dudes without the ability (not quite the right word, but all I can think of) to act on it in sexytimes. <333
Yeah, I agree that the on-off relationship thing in TV varies for the couple and also how the show handles it (they use The Office as an example in that cracked.com article, but Jim/Pam seemed like more of an uphill climb that they drew out just enough for it to work - at least for me).
And Leonard/Penny in BBT is that couple where it's obviously not working out and at this point it's not entertaining so much as frustrating to watch them dick around the same relationship over and over (without exploring anything else, which is what really gets to me, because I think it's kind of a bad plan for shows to get so set in their "vision" for characters/couples that they don't step back and try to play with any other possibilities).
It's actually one of the reasons I loooooove Community - they really aren't afraid to play with couplings and relationships and the characters were specifically put at ages so that any pairing was a viable option.
It's a really dickish way to look at asexuality, kind of like how people used to think homosexuality was some sort of disease. It's in the same vein, which is super super lame. GUYS, PEOPLE HAVE DIFFERING LEVELS OF SEXUAL DESIRES. AND THAT'S COOL.
H-haha no I am crazy. I feel safer with girls because of things men have done to me but I don't BLAME men for what happened, I just can't... have sexy times with men. Even though I think I would probably prefer it, there's too many flashbacks that happen whenever I try.
I've never watched the office-- I mean, I saw BITS of it but I don't like whatshisname (ummmmmh that guy from Evan Allmighty???) so I try to avoid it. He's just too cheesy for me and kind of ruined the show. I liked Dwight. Dwight was fun times. There was someone name Dwight, right, and I'm not remembering it wrong?
I did watch Scrubs though and I was SO FUCKING SICK of JD/Elliot omg. TOGETHER OR NOT, PICK ONE (they did, eventually, but it was in the new format where JD is a teacher for some reason? so I didn't care and stopped watching, my favorite actor got a new show (The Middle <3333) so I just watch that instead. is Scrubs even still on?)
LMAO THAT SCENE the girls are like 'lesbian funtimes? lesbian funtimes<3'
I guess some people find that 'WILL THEY GET BACK TOGETHER, WILL THEY NOT' thing fascinating but idk. it depends on the couple for me. I think after a while if the show goes out of its way to show you a couple doesn't work I don't wanna hear about it anymore, but at the same time people are naive and dumb and will jump back into bad/non-working relationships so it's not really that weird for it to happen on tv. it's just annoying seeing it from a third person perspective because it's like 'YOU TRIED THIS ALREADY STOP THAT' but PEOPLE ARE SILLY.
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You aren't crazy! I definitely understand where you're coming from in your relationships with dudes. On the up side... at least you think ladies are pretty sweet too? But that's still suckish to be into dudes without the ability (not quite the right word, but all I can think of) to act on it in sexytimes. <333
Yeah, I agree that the on-off relationship thing in TV varies for the couple and also how the show handles it (they use The Office as an example in that cracked.com article, but Jim/Pam seemed like more of an uphill climb that they drew out just enough for it to work - at least for me).
And Leonard/Penny in BBT is that couple where it's obviously not working out and at this point it's not entertaining so much as frustrating to watch them dick around the same relationship over and over (without exploring anything else, which is what really gets to me, because I think it's kind of a bad plan for shows to get so set in their "vision" for characters/couples that they don't step back and try to play with any other possibilities).
It's actually one of the reasons I loooooove Community - they really aren't afraid to play with couplings and relationships and the characters were specifically put at ages so that any pairing was a viable option.
AS EVIDENCED IN THIS SCENE:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wEgrvOFY1IU
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H-haha no I am crazy. I feel safer with girls because of things men have done to me but I don't BLAME men for what happened, I just can't... have sexy times with men. Even though I think I would probably prefer it, there's too many flashbacks that happen whenever I try.
I've never watched the office-- I mean, I saw BITS of it but I don't like whatshisname (ummmmmh that guy from Evan Allmighty???) so I try to avoid it. He's just too cheesy for me and kind of ruined the show. I liked Dwight. Dwight was fun times. There was someone name Dwight, right, and I'm not remembering it wrong?
I did watch Scrubs though and I was SO FUCKING SICK of JD/Elliot omg. TOGETHER OR NOT, PICK ONE (they did, eventually, but it was in the new format where JD is a teacher for some reason? so I didn't care and stopped watching, my favorite actor got a new show (The Middle <3333) so I just watch that instead. is Scrubs even still on?)
LMAO THAT SCENE the girls are like 'lesbian funtimes? lesbian funtimes<3'
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