Crush sceneries...need advice

[goldnlocket]

I met a really hot chic at the gay club. At first, I came to her because my friend was busy chatting with someone. I think I acted very polite with her, I bought her a drink, I asked her if she was ok throughout the night, I persuaded her to stay longer since she traveled so far. And i said she was beautiful. However, she didn't dance sexy with me

Comments

[caddishness]

Did you specifically say you wanted to make your former crush jealous? I'm not into grinding at all so if someone asked I'd just assume we didn't have much in common. If they said they wanted to do it to make someone jealous, I might join in if it seemed like funny light-hearted thing and not a creepy obsessive thing. Either way I would assume you weren't over your former crush and therefore emotionally unavailable. I'd have interpreted your flirting as an attempt to make your crush jealous, rebounding or a simple meaningless bar flirting. You got her number so if you're interested you can hang out outside of a bar setting and see how it goes.

Maybe there really was no chemistry there or maybe she's not emotionally available, etc

I've looked at people a lot because I thought they were nice-looking or they were doing something attention-grabbing. If you're a regular maybe the bartender was just looking at you because she recognizes you and happy you had met someone, whatever. In my case sometimes I look at people without checking them out it's really just mindless looking. I've looked at people because I thought they were attractive but didn't necessarily have feelings for them or want anything to happen.

You say the bartender has a gf and is flirtatious just to attract costumers... so really I'd just give up, I wouldn't want to be the other person in a relationship. If they're in an open relationship then I'd take my chances and ask her out (usually bars don't want their staff hooking up with costumers on the spot).

[goldnlocket]

Yes, I told her that I wanted to make my former crush jealous.