Cop Out - 2007
Q1/ Is there anyone/anything you wish to thank?
I would like to give a big shout out to the year two thousand and seven. At first you looked like you were going to produce a similar poor performance to 2006. But then in late January you wowed audiences and critics with a bold thematic change. I personally found the “giving David a full-time job” one of the great plot points of the last 25 years, though I may be biased.
I think what really wowed people though was how you followed-up with more. Not happy with one bold thematic change you continued throughout the year. The change in government was a particular highlight and something that other years considered but to scared to commit to. I was a little concerned when you publicly lent your support to the Labor party, Kevin ’07, campaign. I typically like years to keep their opinions out of politics but what else could we expect from such a bold year? Congratulations 2007, 2008 has a lot to live up to.
Q2/ What happened to the last record of a Just a Noble Quest from 2006?
Well uh… you see… its… Hey! That is a question based on events from 2006 that followed onto 2007, the question is not really about 2007 at all! How dare you? Anyway, the records were destroyed in a fire, yes… that’s what happened… and then the fire and quest log were eaten by a pan-dimensional being… I tried to slay the pan-dimensional being but failed because I was too slow. Thankfully someone else wasn’t too slow and slayed it for me. But it was too late the record of final Just and Noble Quest was lost.
Q3/ What did you think would be ‘the way of the future’ in 2007 but wasn’t?
I thought kilts would make a comeback. Seriously. It’s sad it didn’t happen really, my surname and thus heritage are Scottish - we have our own tartan I could have worn.
Q4/ Could 2007 have done with more Leopards?
Clearly the answer to that question is yes. Leopards keep things interesting. Think about it, you would be more inclined to watch the news if there was a segment called Leopard Watch.
Q5/ What should 2007 have had more of?
Kissing, in particular with me involved, with a woman roughly my age ideally as a willing participant.
Q6/ You call that a question? This is a question!
No, the first part was a question, but a rhetorical one that it’s not intended that I answer. The second part “This is a question!” is a statement… or to be more precise an exclamation as denoted by the use of “!”
Q6 (edit)/ You call that a question! This is a question?
Now your just confused and unsure of yourself, but yes now you are a question!
Q7/ So who is your current crush as of the end of 2007?
What? I can’t tell you that! She reads this journal! What kind of person just asks personal questions without thought of the possible consequences of answering that in a public forum? I must have my secrets or at least have the illusion of secrets!
Q8/ Would Domination - how goes it?
Its been going well. Workchoices legislation proved to be a particular boon to my progress. Individual contracts were useful in setting up the most productive working conditions for my minions. The key problem with taking over the world that most people don’t expect or realise is that the Union of Serving Workers And Regulated Minions (U-SWARM) is one of the most powerful unions in Australia.
I mean you should see the leave entitlements these guys have. Check this clause out “45.3 b) All Minions and Servants shall be entitled to, from the commence of employment, three months paid imprisonment leave, per annum, if arrested in following out work duties.” I mean really, that is ridiculous, how I supposed to afford that? Thankfully removing that clause passed the fairness test. Unfortunately I suspect that I will have to reinstate it following a repealing of Workchoices.
Q9/ Is it an issue that the time required to generate a meta-human through scientific means negates the usefulness of the attempted astrological feat?
Uh… I have no idea what you’re going on about… I’m just going to smile enigmatically and back away slowly.
Q10/ Major Theological Question of 2007?
The problem is simple; rainbows are caused by the refraction of sunlight through moisture in the air. Now therefore, there are three components to create rainbows: the Sun, water in the air and the physics of refraction. Genesis established that the Sun was around from the fourth day of creation. Since water in the air is essential to the sustaining of life and the ecosystem we can assume that was around from early on also so as to sustain the plants. So after the flood, when God creates rainbows was probably when the refraction process began. My question is this; does this mean that the sky was only blue after the flood?
I would like to give a big shout out to the year two thousand and seven. At first you looked like you were going to produce a similar poor performance to 2006. But then in late January you wowed audiences and critics with a bold thematic change. I personally found the “giving David a full-time job” one of the great plot points of the last 25 years, though I may be biased.
I think what really wowed people though was how you followed-up with more. Not happy with one bold thematic change you continued throughout the year. The change in government was a particular highlight and something that other years considered but to scared to commit to. I was a little concerned when you publicly lent your support to the Labor party, Kevin ’07, campaign. I typically like years to keep their opinions out of politics but what else could we expect from such a bold year? Congratulations 2007, 2008 has a lot to live up to.
Q2/ What happened to the last record of a Just a Noble Quest from 2006?
Well uh… you see… its… Hey! That is a question based on events from 2006 that followed onto 2007, the question is not really about 2007 at all! How dare you? Anyway, the records were destroyed in a fire, yes… that’s what happened… and then the fire and quest log were eaten by a pan-dimensional being… I tried to slay the pan-dimensional being but failed because I was too slow. Thankfully someone else wasn’t too slow and slayed it for me. But it was too late the record of final Just and Noble Quest was lost.
Q3/ What did you think would be ‘the way of the future’ in 2007 but wasn’t?
I thought kilts would make a comeback. Seriously. It’s sad it didn’t happen really, my surname and thus heritage are Scottish - we have our own tartan I could have worn.
Q4/ Could 2007 have done with more Leopards?
Clearly the answer to that question is yes. Leopards keep things interesting. Think about it, you would be more inclined to watch the news if there was a segment called Leopard Watch.
Q5/ What should 2007 have had more of?
Kissing, in particular with me involved, with a woman roughly my age ideally as a willing participant.
Q6/ You call that a question? This is a question!
No, the first part was a question, but a rhetorical one that it’s not intended that I answer. The second part “This is a question!” is a statement… or to be more precise an exclamation as denoted by the use of “!”
Q6 (edit)/ You call that a question! This is a question?
Now your just confused and unsure of yourself, but yes now you are a question!
Q7/ So who is your current crush as of the end of 2007?
What? I can’t tell you that! She reads this journal! What kind of person just asks personal questions without thought of the possible consequences of answering that in a public forum? I must have my secrets or at least have the illusion of secrets!
Q8/ Would Domination - how goes it?
Its been going well. Workchoices legislation proved to be a particular boon to my progress. Individual contracts were useful in setting up the most productive working conditions for my minions. The key problem with taking over the world that most people don’t expect or realise is that the Union of Serving Workers And Regulated Minions (U-SWARM) is one of the most powerful unions in Australia.
I mean you should see the leave entitlements these guys have. Check this clause out “45.3 b) All Minions and Servants shall be entitled to, from the commence of employment, three months paid imprisonment leave, per annum, if arrested in following out work duties.” I mean really, that is ridiculous, how I supposed to afford that? Thankfully removing that clause passed the fairness test. Unfortunately I suspect that I will have to reinstate it following a repealing of Workchoices.
Q9/ Is it an issue that the time required to generate a meta-human through scientific means negates the usefulness of the attempted astrological feat?
Uh… I have no idea what you’re going on about… I’m just going to smile enigmatically and back away slowly.
Q10/ Major Theological Question of 2007?
The problem is simple; rainbows are caused by the refraction of sunlight through moisture in the air. Now therefore, there are three components to create rainbows: the Sun, water in the air and the physics of refraction. Genesis established that the Sun was around from the fourth day of creation. Since water in the air is essential to the sustaining of life and the ecosystem we can assume that was around from early on also so as to sustain the plants. So after the flood, when God creates rainbows was probably when the refraction process began. My question is this; does this mean that the sky was only blue after the flood?