(no subject)
I've had a good day. I mean what could have went wrong on a nice, pretty warm day today? Nothing happen. Till now. I dunno. I got to looked at my messengers and stuff..and I feel like I've been disconnected from people. I don't talk to half of them anymore, and the ones I do talk to either, isn't very long or I end up getting into a fight. Thats why last night, I sent to all the people on my yahoo list to let me know if they wanted to stay on my list. I think I might have got a handfull and thats it. Ok maybe over a handfull. But i'm not counting lol. And I have like 30 people on the list. And only just over a handfull pmed me back asking to be left on. Which I'm going to leave them on there, but the rest that hasn't pmed me back...is going. I mean gone. That just shows me who I was friends with or whatever. I don't mean to sound mean. But I was tried of having people on my lists that either never came online...or people I have on there that I only...talked to once in a blue moon. I guess thats why I feel so disconnected. I like my internet friends. It was fun back in the day with them and everything, and even up till first part of this year. But I just don't know anymore. I don't know if I should give the people one more night, for a chance to pm me to let me know if they want to stay on. Or just going ahead and get rid of the ones that hasn't pmed me. I can't decide.
I hate thinking like this. Usually..well most of the time, I'm pretty much happy or content with whats going on offline and online. But lately I've been doing alot of thinking, and I want to change things. I'm going to change some better ways of myself, make myself...if I can...more outgoing...try not to be shy and shit, and just go and do stuff and try and not think about what i'm about to do. Thats one of my flaws. Thinking. Always thinking...I'm a doing this right? Should I be doing this? What do they think of me? So i'm going to try and be better at that. I'm going to try that. Going to speak my mind more, no matter if it hurts me or the person i'm talking to. I want to be carefree. I want to have fun. But I always somehow stop myself from doing what I really want to do. So, thats why i'm going to change, and be better for myself. Thats got me thinking lately, and thats all I can think about really. I just hope I'm doing the right thing though. Of trying to change for a better person and stuff. Maybe I will be more happier in my life and be more happy of who I am. Lets just eh, hope that I'll stick with this. Hope that I'll keep at it, and change my ways, and stuff you know? I'm known to not fall through on things I said i'll do. And this time I'm really willing to work it out.
Now, I don't usually get deep in my entries or anything like this, and this is the first time that I can ever remember of writing something like this. So you know something is wrong with me, when I start wanting to change who I am. I mean I am happy of who I am, I just want to change some ways I have. So yea. I'm ok. I'll be ok. I just have to stay positve. Keep thinking positve energy and stuff. Stop with the negitve shit I've been thinking, and going through. So..lets hope for a better life.
I hate thinking like this. Usually..well most of the time, I'm pretty much happy or content with whats going on offline and online. But lately I've been doing alot of thinking, and I want to change things. I'm going to change some better ways of myself, make myself...if I can...more outgoing...try not to be shy and shit, and just go and do stuff and try and not think about what i'm about to do. Thats one of my flaws. Thinking. Always thinking...I'm a doing this right? Should I be doing this? What do they think of me? So i'm going to try and be better at that. I'm going to try that. Going to speak my mind more, no matter if it hurts me or the person i'm talking to. I want to be carefree. I want to have fun. But I always somehow stop myself from doing what I really want to do. So, thats why i'm going to change, and be better for myself. Thats got me thinking lately, and thats all I can think about really. I just hope I'm doing the right thing though. Of trying to change for a better person and stuff. Maybe I will be more happier in my life and be more happy of who I am. Lets just eh, hope that I'll stick with this. Hope that I'll keep at it, and change my ways, and stuff you know? I'm known to not fall through on things I said i'll do. And this time I'm really willing to work it out.
Now, I don't usually get deep in my entries or anything like this, and this is the first time that I can ever remember of writing something like this. So you know something is wrong with me, when I start wanting to change who I am. I mean I am happy of who I am, I just want to change some ways I have. So yea. I'm ok. I'll be ok. I just have to stay positve. Keep thinking positve energy and stuff. Stop with the negitve shit I've been thinking, and going through. So..lets hope for a better life.