Shadow
As I sit here, quite upset that I will miss easter dinner with my grandmother and the rest of the family from my father's side which I haven't seen in forever because I am working, I came upon something..
I regret almost every single decision I've made, except last night's.
Last night I went to a desert party, never been, never wanted to, but I hadn't seen my friend Jenee is sometime, so I decided to go out of self interest. Though I neither smoked nor drank, I don't regret going. I don't regret not doing a single thing.
maybe it just wasn't important enough for me to have anything to regret, and with that then, I suppose I really just regret everything I've done.
Or maybe I'm just being too hard on myself. I feel every decision I make is only par, and not the best I could do.
Theres alot of people I need to see again but I feel so distant now...I feel I've forgotten them, so they've forgotten me.
So much confusion...Work will suck today, because of it.
I now understand how my friend Geoff feels. Hes upset with my friend Josh because he gets every girl he likes, and is pretty popular at school.
and now I am jealous of him as well.
People we've both known, always remember him
people I've talked to first, always like him more..
everything we've done, he does better
(I've always been a shadow...
of someone else.)
I regret almost every single decision I've made, except last night's.
Last night I went to a desert party, never been, never wanted to, but I hadn't seen my friend Jenee is sometime, so I decided to go out of self interest. Though I neither smoked nor drank, I don't regret going. I don't regret not doing a single thing.
maybe it just wasn't important enough for me to have anything to regret, and with that then, I suppose I really just regret everything I've done.
Or maybe I'm just being too hard on myself. I feel every decision I make is only par, and not the best I could do.
Theres alot of people I need to see again but I feel so distant now...I feel I've forgotten them, so they've forgotten me.
So much confusion...Work will suck today, because of it.
I now understand how my friend Geoff feels. Hes upset with my friend Josh because he gets every girl he likes, and is pretty popular at school.
and now I am jealous of him as well.
People we've both known, always remember him
people I've talked to first, always like him more..
everything we've done, he does better
(I've always been a shadow...
of someone else.)