[fic] (i feel i need you, baby) what you know to be real [1/1]
Title: (I Feel I Need You, Baby) What You Know to be Real
Rating: G/K
Spoilers: 11x03
Notes: I've given up on the show giving me what I want so I've written it. *very quickly this morning so pardon any errors you spot*
Summary: 11x03 fix it fic. Kind of. In which Arizona gets to talk and her wife actually hears her.
“I quit my job.” The matter-of-fact statement from her wife was enough to get Callie Torres on her feet. Words to properly respond weren't quite in her grasp, though. “Well, a leave of absence,” Arizona Robbins clarified, making a point not to look at her partner while she put her bags down across the back of a chair and dropped her towering stack of papers on the counter. “And not from the hospital itself, but from Peds.”
Callie felt her mouth going dry and nearly bit her tongue closing it to swallow. “What the hell are you talking about?”
Arizona was carefully resolute, determined, as she faced her. “We want a baby but neither one of us actually has time for a baby, so I'm making time.”
“By quitting your job?! Arizona -”
“No, Callie,” Arizona cut her off, keeping her tone mild through force of will. She felt tears burning at the corners of her eyes but blinked them back. Yelling hadn't helped either of them be heard lately. And she was, quite frankly, damn tired of crying all the time. She'd practiced what she was going to say in the car on the way home and she was going to say it. “I know you don't want me to have to give up anything, and it's amazing and I love you so much for it, but it's just not working.” Callie gasped but Arizona forced herself to keep going. “I can't juggle Peds, and the fellowship, and you and Sofia, and a new baby. So I am stepping down from Peds, temporarily, at least, so I can focus on the fellowship at work. It's two years, so I will be busy during a lot of the pregnancy and the first year, but it'll be better than if I'm trying to do board meetings, department meetings, and writing papers. And Alex needs a job so he can step into Peds and I trust him not to ruin things.”
“Jackson told me you - but -”
Arizona's shoulders rose and fell in a tiny shrug. “This is what needs to happen if we really want to have another baby right now.”
Face falling, Callie sighed. “You don't want -”
“Will you stop saying that, please?!” Arizona interjected, losing her calm tone for a second. “I want another baby. I'm just trying to be reasonable. We can't do my fellowship, and your veteran project, and raise a toddler, and have another baby. We just can't, Callie.”
“If you want me to quit -”
“Stop it!” Arizona cut in again. She left her post by the kitchen counter and moved across the room to face Callie squarely. Both hands found a grip on the sleeves of her wife's shirt before she slipped them up to hold her face steady. “Listen to the words that I'm saying, alright?” Callie's mouth moved for a moment, tears welling in her eyes, but she nodded minutely. “Okay,” hummed Arizona, unable to resist darting in to kiss her swiftly. “First of all is that I love you and Sofia more than life itself. You got that?” Callie's smile was watery but there. “Second is that I want nothing more than to have another kid with you.” Her own expression was soft but serious, tone earnest. “Nothing,” she repeated herself. “Not the fellowship or the Peds department.” Callie licked her lips but didn't speak. “But I like spending time with you,” she smiled, “and with Sofia, and I'd like the new baby to know her Mama, so I have to let something go.” The hands on Callie's neck moved to guide her head down, ensuring their eye-contact was steady. “I will not let go of you or Sofia, so I have decided to let Peds go. Do you understand?”
Callie's tears welled and burst, rolling down her cheeks. Arizona wiped them away with her thumbs. “Arizona, I can't make you -”
“You're not making me do anything. This is what makes sense. You see that, don't you?”
Callie nodded almost reluctantly. “I'll quit my -”
“No you won't,” Arizona stated, shaking her head. “That is an amazing project and will help so many soldiers.” Her expression went tentative. “Just, maybe, delegate? I know it's your research, but -”
“I'll need Jackson to do the nerves, but Hunt could do the application stuff with that group.”
Arizona's smile grew again and it was so familiar that the rush of relief nearly took Callie's legs out from under her. Fortunately Arizona's arms were right there to keep her steady. “You okay?” Callie nodded eagerly, her own smile radiant. “Okay. So that would be okay with you?”
“It would be more time for my own research, Owen would have a reason to live,” Arizona shook her head reproachfully but her eyes were gleeful, “and we could do this. Right? I mean, we'd have to coordinate schedules, but we already do, and -”
Sensing the ramble to come Arizona headed it off the best way she could think of, wrapping both arms around her wife's shoulder and pulling her down into a kiss. It took Callie less than a second to adjust, her own arms winding tight around Arizona's waist and nearly picking her up off her feet in the wave of joy that washed through her. They could do this. It would take work, and compromise, and probably painful honesty at times, but neither one were giving up and she could feel it in Arizona's kiss.
“I love you.” The words were breathed between kisses that grew ever deeper. “We can do this.”
Rating: G/K
Spoilers: 11x03
Notes: I've given up on the show giving me what I want so I've written it. *very quickly this morning so pardon any errors you spot*
Summary: 11x03 fix it fic. Kind of. In which Arizona gets to talk and her wife actually hears her.
“I quit my job.” The matter-of-fact statement from her wife was enough to get Callie Torres on her feet. Words to properly respond weren't quite in her grasp, though. “Well, a leave of absence,” Arizona Robbins clarified, making a point not to look at her partner while she put her bags down across the back of a chair and dropped her towering stack of papers on the counter. “And not from the hospital itself, but from Peds.”
Callie felt her mouth going dry and nearly bit her tongue closing it to swallow. “What the hell are you talking about?”
Arizona was carefully resolute, determined, as she faced her. “We want a baby but neither one of us actually has time for a baby, so I'm making time.”
“By quitting your job?! Arizona -”
“No, Callie,” Arizona cut her off, keeping her tone mild through force of will. She felt tears burning at the corners of her eyes but blinked them back. Yelling hadn't helped either of them be heard lately. And she was, quite frankly, damn tired of crying all the time. She'd practiced what she was going to say in the car on the way home and she was going to say it. “I know you don't want me to have to give up anything, and it's amazing and I love you so much for it, but it's just not working.” Callie gasped but Arizona forced herself to keep going. “I can't juggle Peds, and the fellowship, and you and Sofia, and a new baby. So I am stepping down from Peds, temporarily, at least, so I can focus on the fellowship at work. It's two years, so I will be busy during a lot of the pregnancy and the first year, but it'll be better than if I'm trying to do board meetings, department meetings, and writing papers. And Alex needs a job so he can step into Peds and I trust him not to ruin things.”
“Jackson told me you - but -”
Arizona's shoulders rose and fell in a tiny shrug. “This is what needs to happen if we really want to have another baby right now.”
Face falling, Callie sighed. “You don't want -”
“Will you stop saying that, please?!” Arizona interjected, losing her calm tone for a second. “I want another baby. I'm just trying to be reasonable. We can't do my fellowship, and your veteran project, and raise a toddler, and have another baby. We just can't, Callie.”
“If you want me to quit -”
“Stop it!” Arizona cut in again. She left her post by the kitchen counter and moved across the room to face Callie squarely. Both hands found a grip on the sleeves of her wife's shirt before she slipped them up to hold her face steady. “Listen to the words that I'm saying, alright?” Callie's mouth moved for a moment, tears welling in her eyes, but she nodded minutely. “Okay,” hummed Arizona, unable to resist darting in to kiss her swiftly. “First of all is that I love you and Sofia more than life itself. You got that?” Callie's smile was watery but there. “Second is that I want nothing more than to have another kid with you.” Her own expression was soft but serious, tone earnest. “Nothing,” she repeated herself. “Not the fellowship or the Peds department.” Callie licked her lips but didn't speak. “But I like spending time with you,” she smiled, “and with Sofia, and I'd like the new baby to know her Mama, so I have to let something go.” The hands on Callie's neck moved to guide her head down, ensuring their eye-contact was steady. “I will not let go of you or Sofia, so I have decided to let Peds go. Do you understand?”
Callie's tears welled and burst, rolling down her cheeks. Arizona wiped them away with her thumbs. “Arizona, I can't make you -”
“You're not making me do anything. This is what makes sense. You see that, don't you?”
Callie nodded almost reluctantly. “I'll quit my -”
“No you won't,” Arizona stated, shaking her head. “That is an amazing project and will help so many soldiers.” Her expression went tentative. “Just, maybe, delegate? I know it's your research, but -”
“I'll need Jackson to do the nerves, but Hunt could do the application stuff with that group.”
Arizona's smile grew again and it was so familiar that the rush of relief nearly took Callie's legs out from under her. Fortunately Arizona's arms were right there to keep her steady. “You okay?” Callie nodded eagerly, her own smile radiant. “Okay. So that would be okay with you?”
“It would be more time for my own research, Owen would have a reason to live,” Arizona shook her head reproachfully but her eyes were gleeful, “and we could do this. Right? I mean, we'd have to coordinate schedules, but we already do, and -”
Sensing the ramble to come Arizona headed it off the best way she could think of, wrapping both arms around her wife's shoulder and pulling her down into a kiss. It took Callie less than a second to adjust, her own arms winding tight around Arizona's waist and nearly picking her up off her feet in the wave of joy that washed through her. They could do this. It would take work, and compromise, and probably painful honesty at times, but neither one were giving up and she could feel it in Arizona's kiss.
“I love you.” The words were breathed between kisses that grew ever deeper. “We can do this.”