[fic] the song remains the same [17/?]
Title: The Song Remains the Same
Rating: M
Spoilers: 8x13
Summary: I had a dream. Crazy dream. Ellis Grey is alive and well. Seattle Grace is the premiere hospital in the country. Callie Torres is married to Owen Hunt, with a home and three children, while Arizona Robbins does who and whatever she pleases. The history is different, the world itself has changed, but the song remains the same.
*If/Then* Calzona - Picking up where 8x13 ended
*****
It was another half a day before the plane was found, six hours beyond that before they were out of the woods and on their way to Boise. Callie and Arizona were both at work, though Ellis had restricted each to paperwork only. She came herself to find them, poking her head into their lounge and interrupting the tense silence. “Dr. Torres, could we?”
“Just tell me, Ellis,” Callie requested wearily, pushing herself to her feet.
“The survivors are en route to Boise Memorial,” Dr. Grey reported briskly without even a glance toward Arizona.
Callie's eyes closed. “How many casualties?” Arizona asked when it became clear that Callie couldn't speak the words.
“One so far,” Ellis told her, gaze moving slowly between the two. “Charles Percy.”
Callie looked up, dark eyes wide. “So Owen isn't -?”
Their Chief of Surgery's face softened sympathetically but she didn't smile. “He's alive. But he's critical.”
“I'm going. To Boise, I'm going.” There was no arguing with the tone in Callie's voice and Ellis nodded.
Arizona cleared her throat but Callie was already mentally gone, planning rapidly. “What happened?” Arizona asked hoarsely. “To everyone... Do they know yet?”
Ellis' lips pursed. “Early reports are sketchy at best. Everyone is scraped up but we heard Yang had a dislocated shoulder, Kepner a laceration on her thigh, neither serious.”
"What about Alex?” Arizona asked, anxiety getting the better of her patience. “Dr. Karev?”
The older woman's lips tightened. “His femur was badly broken in the crash. It's not good.” Her face fell further. “And Dr. Avery's hand is injured.” In her world the son of Catherine Avery's precious surgical hands were worth infinitely more than a Peds fellow's leg. “They'll be in Boise in a few hours and we can get a clearer picture of what's going on.”
“I need to go,” Callie announced again. “Ellis, are you -?”
Their Chief nodded. “I'll make sure the helicopter doesn't leave without you. Meet in my office in an hour.”
“Thank you.” Ellis was gone without saying more and Arizona let out the breath she'd been holding. It still felt unreal, all of it. Percy was dead, the others were hurt, seriously hurt. Callie had her mind focused on Owen, on the injuries that directly affected her family, and Arizona couldn't fault her for that. The rest of it felt like it could wash her away, though. She wasn't close to any of the others in the crash except for Alex, but it was still upsetting that something like this had happened to people they worked with, people she saw in the halls every day.
Arizona was a professional, able to put her emotions aside to do what she needed to do. Which, at this moment, was whatever Callie needed her to do. “Callie, what -?”
Callie was already moving, shifting her weight between her feet, one hand straightening her papers while the other dug for her keys. Both hands were occupied by working a key off the ring before she thought better of it and dropped the whole thing in her palm. “Here.” She handed it to Arizona, distracted by the thoughts going a million miles an hour in her head. “There should be plenty of food in the fridge for tonight, and if I'm going to be gone longer I'll let you know, of course.”
It hadn't been stated aloud, but apparently what Callie needed from her was for her to stay with her kids while she went to Boise to check on their father. Arizona weighed the keys in her hand, holding her breath again. She could handle one night, maybe two with Callie's kids. She liked them, they were good kids, they liked her. It wasn't how she expected to get a key to Callie's house either, but it was a big statement about how much her girlfriend trusted her. Enough to leave her children in her care for at least a day, probably longer. “Oh-kay,” Arizona breathed softly. “I can handle things here.”
Callie blinked, realizing how much she was actually counting on from her girlfriend. “Hey, I'm sorry. I just - I can call Owen's mom if -”
"No,” Arizona interjected softly, her head shaking from side to side. “Owen's mom has got enough to worry about. So do you. I can take care of the kids.” She sighed heavily, palming the key to Callie's house. “You just be careful, okay?” Air travel might still be statistically the safest, but she was sending the woman she loved to deal with the aftermath of a plane crash. “Are you alright?”
Callie took a deep breath. “I love you. Thank you for this. I know I'm just dropping them on you -”
“Don't worry about us,” Arizona cut in again, still gently. “Take care of Owen.”
“I love you,” Callie repeated, moving around the table and leaving her paperwork momentarily behind. Her hands settled on her girlfriend's hips. “And thank you.” Arizona stepped in a half foot closer. Callie's forehead dropped to her shoulder, the brunette loudly exhaling. “I don't know what I would do without you.”
Combing fingers through dark hair Arizona inhaled. “That's not something you have to worry about,” she whispered. “I'm not going anywhere.” She turned her face into Callie's hair. “Call me when you get there, please.”
“I will.”
“How much do you want me to tell the kids?” Arizona checked. Callie was trusting her to take care of them, and she gave bad news to kids every day at her job, but this situation felt more than a little out of her realm.
Callie's eyes closed. “For now just tell them that I had to work late. We can figure out something else once I get there and know exactly what's going on.” She didn't lift her head, groaning. “I don't think I've ever seen Owen hurt before,” she commented. “Not seriously, at least.” They'd all seen him with minor injuries, the ER occasionally getting rough even before he'd started punching holes in windows. “I don't know if-”
“You can do this,” Arizona whispered, stroking her hair softly. “You're the best at what you do, Calliope. He needs you right now. Maybe more than he ever has.”
Callie straightened and swallowed hard. “No pressure.” Her voice was hoarse, cracked.
Licking her lips Arizona stood on her toes, pressing a chaste kiss to her girlfriend's forehead and lingering for a pair of heartbeats. She sank slowly back onto her heels, the next kiss finding Callie's mouth. The contact stayed light, no time for anything more. “If you need me -” Arizona started, Callie's eyes very close to her own.
“I need you,” Callie confirmed without hesitation. “But I'll call.”
“You better,” Arizona told her with a tiny smile. “I know you need to go.” She made no move to let her go, however, and Callie didn't attempt to get out of her grip.
“I'm going.” Callie remained motionless. “Now.” She didn't move until her phone buzzed on her hip, an impatient nudge from Ellis Grey. Callie finally stepped back with a heavy sigh.
Arizona tried a more reassuring smile. “Let me know what's going on later.”
“You too.” Callie returned her smile weakly, waving two fingers over her shoulder as she left.
Trying to work, Arizona was distracted all day, getting the text from Callie that they'd safely arrived in Boise and were going to be sorting through the mess of injuries. After that focus seemed impossible. It wasn't like she was allowed to operate today anyway. Giving up with a sigh, Arizona gathered the rest of her papers and slung her bag over her shoulder. After today she could use a drink. Or ten.
That wasn't an option tonight, though. Because she was keeping Callie's kids. She pushed the button for the third floor instead of the ground, free hand digging Callie's keys out of her bag. It didn't occur to her until she reached the door that picking up the kids might not be as simple as figuring out whose car seat was whose. The daycare's staff wouldn't let them go with just anyone, and with the rush Callie had been in it would be a surprise if getting Arizona on the list had slipped her mind.
Arizona couldn't exactly call Callie up though and get the whole thing straightened out over the phone, not with what Callie was dealing with in Boise. She'd just have to convince them that she wasn't trying to kidnap a coworker's children. “Hi.” That was a good start, simple. “I'm here about Dr. Torres' kids...”
The nurse on duty just smiled, nowhere near as suspicious as Arizona had expected. “Of course. Let me just -” She scanned a list on her screen. “Here you are.” She turned on her rotating chair. “Allegra, Gavin, Gus, Dr. Robbins is here to pick you up. Get your bags, please.”
The kids seemed to think nothing of the change in plans, all three excitedly scurrying to gather their things and race to the door. Gavin succeeded in beating his siblings but Owen Hunt's son held the door for the other two even as he grinned eagerly at Arizona. “Hey, guys. You have a good day?” she asked, reaching over his head to help with the door.
“Yeah! Are we sleeping over at your house?!” Gavin asked, speaking over anything the others might have said.
“Um, no, but I'm going to stay at your house tonight,” Arizona answered him. She felt nervous, waiting for the next question to be one she couldn't answer.
“Awesome!” Gavin's grin was across his entire face. He had Callie's smile. Of course, Arizona wasn't sure she'd ever seen Hunt smile.
“Where's Mommy?” Gus chimed in, his backpack sliding off of his shoulder and almost dragging the ground.
“Your mom's got to work late so she asked me to hang out with you guys. Is that alright?” Arizona felt apprehensive, waiting for distrust or suspicion from the three. They were going to figure out that she was lying to them, that she was hiding something. There was nothing but happy eagerness, blind trust. They were wriggling like puppies as they seemed to revolve around her legs while they all walked toward the exit.
The ride was full of chatter, no one the least bit suspicious about why they were spending the night with Arizona, just relieved that they weren't going to have to be extra quiet at their grandmother's house - their usual fallback when both parents had to work. “Can we have pizza for dinner?” Allegra asked, spotting the sign through the window and shooting for the moon.
Arizona's culinary expertise was more geared toward keeping herself alive and the occasional dessert designed to get a woman's pants off, nothing suitable for sustaining three children, so she agreed immediately, quietly grateful for the suggestion, and turned in.
Thankfully Callie's children had been taught very well how to act in public, something Arizona hadn't even considered until Gavin was already loose from his seat and scrambling out of the car. He just stood close beside the door though, waiting while she unhooked his brother, Allegra more than capable of setting herself free. They all held hands in the parking lot and filed in while Arizona held the door, privately marveling at how well behaved the three were.
Allegra helped her with two booster seats for the boys without being asked, Arizona leading them to a table with a nod toward the hostess. “Okay, here we go.” They climbed into their seats and she distributed place mats and crayons. “Figure out what you want to eat before you get too into that, okay?” Arizona directed. She felt stressed, more nervous about getting three kids through dinner than she'd been in her OR in years. They were fine though, laughing and coloring and caring not at all that their caregiver felt like she had no idea what she was doing.
“How's everyone tonight?” their waitress greeted the table with a cheerful grin, laughing when she got a chorus of answers.
“We're alright,” said Arizona with a tight smile. “Thanks.”
“Well, what can I get everyone to drink?” She wrote down the requests with a smile and a nod. “I'll be right back with those. Lids and straws?”
“Thank you,” Arizona agreed with a grateful breath.
The kids each thanked her politely when the young woman set down their drinks. “You're welcome, sweeties,” she said warmly. “Your kids are just so polite!” she marveled to Arizona under her breath. “I can barely get my two year old to acknowledge me.”
Arizona's eyes went wide, her mouth falling open. “Oh - uh - they, um, they're not - I'm actually n-”
“She's not our mommy,” Allegra chimed in, speaking around her straw. “Arizona's our mommy's girlfriend.” She slurped her drink loudly for a moment. “Mommy's at work and Daddy's on a trip so we're staying with Arizona.”
“And some things we don't need to tell people we just met,” Arizona told her with an embarrassed smile for their patient waitress. “Even if she's a very nice lady, okay?”
“Yep,” Allegra answered, giving her a grin. “Yes, ma'am,” she corrected herself when Arizona blinked at her. She was still in disbelief about how smoothly this was all going, but if the look had won her an extra bit of politeness then she wasn't going to question it. “Can I have pepperoni on mine, please?”
"Sure thing, Legs,” Arizona agreed easily. “Guys, what do you want on yours?”
“Cheeses!” Gavin requested with a toothy grin.
“What about you?” Arizona asked Angus, leaning over to talk directly to the shyer twin. His answer was mumbled and she leaned in closer, smiling sweetly to him. “What?” He whispered it in her ear again. “Pepperoni?”
“Peppers,” Allegra corrected her. “He likes peppers. The green ones.” She wrinkled her nose in a grimace. Clearly she wasn't a fan of her brother's choice of pizza toppings.
Gus confirmed it with a nod. “Okay, so, one kid's pizza with pepperoni, one with cheese, and one with green peppers,” recited Arizona diligently. “And I'll have two slices with chicken and pesto.”
“I'll have that right out to you guys,” their server told them with a friendly smile.
Dinner went smoothly, Arizona doing her best to keep up with the kids' chatter. She was around children all the time at work. This was something else entirely. These weren't patients, kids she would only know for a few days, weeks, months. She was in Callie's life, just like they were. And she wanted to be in Callie's life for the foreseeable future, a long time, if she was being optimistic. The kids would become a part of her life too if that was the case. Arizona would be alright with that. They were wonderful children - sweet, smart, and funny.
It was everything else about being in each other's lives - picking them up from school, tucking them in at night, all the casual little moments that she didn't get with her patients - that freaked her out the most about the idea of embracing their new reality. Because up until now she'd been able to tell herself that her role in the children's lives wouldn't be serious, she wouldn't be counted on.
That was before a plane had fallen out of the sky with their father on board.
Now even the best case scenario, that Owen was alive and would recover, meant that in the meantime she'd be making breakfasts and doing laundry until he got better and everyone's schedule went back to normal. If the worst happened she couldn't even comprehend what changes would be wrought on Callie's life, the kids'.
Gavin finished his dinner first but was determined to fill in the picture on his place mat and colored while his siblings and Arizona finished their food. He was content. They all were. They didn't know that their lives could be changing at this very moment while they unknowingly munched pizza.
“What are we going to do when we get home, guys?” Arizona asked, the quiet giving her too much time to ruminate. “Play a game? Watch a movie? Got any ideas?”
They were still discussing the pros and cons of The Incredibles versus Despicable Me (with Arizona torn between the two and keeping her mouth shut in the front seat) while she drove them home from the restaurant (and when, exactly, had she started mentally referring to Callie's house as home?). Arizona keyed them into the house as her phone rang in her purse, letting them in as she paused in the door to dig for it. “You guys pick one and I'll be right there,” she directed them. “Gus, you make sure there's no fighting, okay bud?” She found the phone and felt her chest tighten as she saw Callie's picture on the screen. “Hey.”
“Hey.” Callie sounded stressed, tired, her voice tight. “How are you doing?”
“They're fine,” Arizona promised, taking a step back out onto the porch and lowering her voice. “How are you? How's Owen?” Callie didn't speak for a moment and Arizona checked the phone to make sure the call was still connected. “Hello? Callie?”
“They put Owen in a coma.”
Arizona stepped outside and pulled the door almost closed behind her, one hand on the knob. “Oh my God.”
Callie was near tears, nowhere close to being professional or detached. “It's medically induced to give his heart a chance to rest and recover.” She cleared her throat. “C-c-cristina said he never stopped moving out there. She said h-he -”
“Callie, shh, just breathe,” Arizona coaxed, her heart aching at the pain in the other woman's voice. “Of could he didn't. Owen saves people. That's who he is.”
“Well, it might have killed him,” Callie shot back, choking and crying before the sentence had left her mouth. “Arizona, I'm sorry. I didn't -”
“Shh, it's okay,” Arizona soothed her again. “Don't worry about me. I'm fine. I can take it.” She swallowed the lump in her throat. “Owen overworked his heart?”
Callie took an audibly shaky breath and held it. “He got everyone together, under shelter. He couldn't build a fire because of all the rain but he helped them all stay awake, took care of everybody's injuries.”
“He's a hero,” Arizona chimed in hoarsely. Callie took another rough breath. “What do the doctors say?” Maybe if she could turn the conversation toward the clinical it would help.
Taking another long pause, Callie answered, “There was a PE and he didn't tell anyone. Cristina evacuated the blood from around his heart with a spray bottle tube.” Arizona grimaced as she tried to imagine improvising an operation like that. “But it was growing for hours and they only found out about it after he collapsed, so they're not sure how bad the damage is yet.” She paused again, her voice broken and small. “They won't let me near his case, of course, but...” There was another audible breath. “Arizona, I don't even know what I would do if I could -” She broke down again, nearly defeated.
“Callie, it doesn't mean there's nothing that can be done,” Arizona started to say.
“I'm the best!” Callie choked out in a growl even as she started to sob in bitter earnest.
“You are,” agreed Arizona quickly. “But you can't focus right now and that's why someone else has to be on this case. They can see things that you can't right now, sweetheart.”
“You don't think I'd save him if I could!?”
“Of course I don't think that! You're emotional right now, Callie. You can't think straight.” Arizona closed her eyes. She wished she could pull Callie into her arms right now. “Can you sleep?”
“No.” It wasn't an unexpected answer, no hesitation on Callie's side of the phone.
“Then will you give me to someone who will sedate you?” Arizona requested, relieved when it earned her a single choked laugh. “Please try and sleep?” she asked more seriously. “For the sake of your children who love you? And me?”
“Don't you love me too?” Callie asked meekly, her voice hoarse. Even through the phone she sounded beaten down.
Arizona inhaled deeply, squeezing her eyes closed more tightly. “More than anything,” she answered honestly. “Owen's resting now. You need to rest too. Please at least try, even if you won't leave the hospital.”
“Arizona...”
“Tell me you'll at least lay down,” Arizona pushed gently. “You can go back to it fresh in the morning. It'll be better for both of you if you've gotten some rest. Please promise me?”
There was nothing to do but agree, her own weariness making arguing with her girlfriend impossible. “I promise.” Callie groaned. “Thank you.”
“Take care of yourself,” instructed Arizona earnestly. “Call me back in the morning, okay?”
“Are the kids okay? They're behaving?”
Arizona smiled, leaning against the door frame and poking the door open just enough to catch sight of the living room. “They're fine. We just got home from pizza and they're deciding with movie we're going to watch before bedtime. Do you want to talk to anybody?”
Hesitating, Callie finally sighed. “No,” she decided. “Just tell them I love them and I'll talk to all of them in the morning.” She breathed in and held it, feeling an ache in every muscle. “Give them kisses from me.”
Arizona pulled her bottom lip between her teeth, still smiling softly. “I will.” She wished she could give Callie a kiss. Or a hug, or hold her while she slept. But she couldn't do any of those things. All she could do for Callie right now was talk. It didn't feel like nearly enough. “I love you.”
“I love you,” Callie stated. “I'll call you back in the morning.”
"Get some rest,” Arizona whispered, lowering her phone only once the line went dead. An excited shriek of her name drew her back inside. “I'm coming! Did you guys decide on one?”
“Incredibles!” Gavin announced, already working on getting the disc out of the case and into the player.
“Sounds good, bud,” sighed Arizona, flopping into the corner of the couch and closing her eyes as she leaned her head back. She was tired and she'd only been on the outside of events. She couldn't imagine how exhausted Callie had to be. Her breath escaped in a huff as Allegra made herself comfortable in the space right in front of her. Gavin was satisfied with the rest of the couch, but Gus waited for Arizona to shift over and give his sister more room, squirming into her side as soon as she was settled.
Arizona had been alone for her entire adult life, excepting a few mildly serious relationships in her mid-twenties. Whatever happened in her life, good or bad, she got through it on her own. Right now though, she wasn't sure what she'd be doing without these kids surrounding her.
The thought of Callie doing it on her own, coping alone in an on-call room in a new, unfamiliar hospital tonight, it broke her heart.
[part 18 here]