nursing homes
so i was talking to a friend about medical care last night. there is nothing so weird as talking to someone about medical care. especially other people's medical care.
i have a few criteria that i used, that i developed after visiting nursing homes, for picking a nursing home for my mother: it has to feel physically clean, the aides can't be yelling at patients for needing to go to the bathroom, the bathrooms *must* have working fans, there must be readily available commodes to raise the height of the toilet for people with bad knees, and there has to be a sense of dignity for everyone involved. dignity is never available to only one group -- it has to be available (to the extent possible) for everyone.
ok, so guess what, given that, i found one. it's not perfect, but for the most part, it hits the big points most of the time. at this place, my mother feels safe and is healthy.
so i was talking to someone, and they called it "swanky." only if you live your life right and end up in a nursing home under the right legal permutations while you've got enough money in the bank do you get to go to a "swanky" nursing home, and she blamed someone for ending up in a bad one -- it's her fault for making the wrong life choices and getting in the wrong nursing home.
to me, that's blaming the victim.
we can't accept dirty nursing homes as ok. we can't accept yelling at patients for needing to go to the bathroom as ok (it's illegal, but it goes on, and i've seen it). we can't accept bathrooms that smell like rotting meat are ok (the fan didn't work, and there appeared to be no process for fixing it).
this isn't a health care debate post. this is more a "raise our standards" post. there are rules already there for what is legal, and we flout them, because we don't imagine that things can be OK. It's not swanky to expect working bathroom fans, reasonable toilet schedules, and clean surfaces. it is swanky to expect to socks to stay in matched pairs week in and week out. socks -- don't expect the socks to stay. but fans, schedules, surfaces? that's not swanky. that's dignity.
i have a few criteria that i used, that i developed after visiting nursing homes, for picking a nursing home for my mother: it has to feel physically clean, the aides can't be yelling at patients for needing to go to the bathroom, the bathrooms *must* have working fans, there must be readily available commodes to raise the height of the toilet for people with bad knees, and there has to be a sense of dignity for everyone involved. dignity is never available to only one group -- it has to be available (to the extent possible) for everyone.
ok, so guess what, given that, i found one. it's not perfect, but for the most part, it hits the big points most of the time. at this place, my mother feels safe and is healthy.
so i was talking to someone, and they called it "swanky." only if you live your life right and end up in a nursing home under the right legal permutations while you've got enough money in the bank do you get to go to a "swanky" nursing home, and she blamed someone for ending up in a bad one -- it's her fault for making the wrong life choices and getting in the wrong nursing home.
to me, that's blaming the victim.
we can't accept dirty nursing homes as ok. we can't accept yelling at patients for needing to go to the bathroom as ok (it's illegal, but it goes on, and i've seen it). we can't accept bathrooms that smell like rotting meat are ok (the fan didn't work, and there appeared to be no process for fixing it).
this isn't a health care debate post. this is more a "raise our standards" post. there are rules already there for what is legal, and we flout them, because we don't imagine that things can be OK. It's not swanky to expect working bathroom fans, reasonable toilet schedules, and clean surfaces. it is swanky to expect to socks to stay in matched pairs week in and week out. socks -- don't expect the socks to stay. but fans, schedules, surfaces? that's not swanky. that's dignity.