Hey, it's a real post...
So, what's going on? I am currently out and about looking for an apartment for me and the kiddos. Thought I'd actually write a real post...one not crammed between doctors' appointments or done via my cel phone. 
Isaiah is amazing. It is very different than my experience with Tia. With Tia, I was so ready to get right back to school/work/'life' and didn't really appreciate how great the experience was. With Isaiah, I've taken to playing the lottery and hoping I win so that I don't have to go back to work!! I would love to be able to stay home with him.
Admittedly, I do get stressed. Especially at 4 am when he won't quit crying and I've changed, fed, burped, picked up, sang to him. It was especially hard while trying to breastfeed. Apparently, in another cosmic joke, I'm just not cut out to breast feed. I met with lactation consultants every day for 3 weeks, took supplements, pumped (with a Medela pump...so it wasn't a poor quality pump) and still couldn't sustain him. He went from 9 lbs 2 oz to 8 lbs 6 oz...or 8% of his birth weight. It would be nice to have someone here to help out.
Tia, for her part, is great. She adores him. Since I've last posted a real post, she has been diagnosed with Asperger's, which is on the milder side of the Autism spectrum. This was not a surprise. It is something I have suspected for years and have tried to get previous educators and counselors to address. It is now being addressed and she is improving. She has also reached 5'5 and started her period :( Unfortunately, she's growing up faster than I'd like.
Finally, the other big issue concerns the men in my life. Specifically, Rick, Steven and one who shall not be named. And no. It's not Daryle. He's not married. None of that. I'm just hesitant to name him because he does have an LJ and I really don't know how he feels....but I'll get to that.
Rick and Steven have both made remarks during this pregnancy that infuriate me. Rick was upset that I was 'cheating' on him (mind you...he got married 6 months before I got pregnant) and has called (with his wife present) and inquired about "his" kid. Steven, on the other hand, has made numerous statements that Isaiah "should be" his and that he wants a baby.
EXCUSE ME? BOTH of these men had years to make a move.
Rick asked me to move in with him multiple times, but each time I just about took him seriously, he'd start seeing some random chick. In fact, shortly after he met his wife (less than 1.5 years ago), he told me that if I really loved him, I'd move to be with him. Just as I was about to say yes...he tells me he's 'engaged' to this chick he's known less than 2 months.
Steven is the one who told me it would be a "relief" for me to start dating someone else. Never wanted to be bothered. I'd go weeks without hearing a word from him. Had his roommate boldface lie to me about whether he was there (his car was parked outside...I'm not stupid). Has always told me how he doesn't want a relationship. Especially not with me.
The final one is someone I've known for years. Admittedly, I was a bitch to him. But I don't know how he feels anymore. He has defended me when few others would. He has remained my friend when few others would. He is sexy, one of the smartest people I know, responsible, and funny. The question is how does he feel? Does he still want me, but is put off by what has happened in the past? Or is it too late? If it's the former, can I fix it and how? If it's the latter, how do I move on? I've tried. I've dated other people. I've tried to ignore him for months at a time. And, ultimately, I fail.
So, that's my life in a nutshell.
Isaiah is amazing. It is very different than my experience with Tia. With Tia, I was so ready to get right back to school/work/'life' and didn't really appreciate how great the experience was. With Isaiah, I've taken to playing the lottery and hoping I win so that I don't have to go back to work!! I would love to be able to stay home with him.
Admittedly, I do get stressed. Especially at 4 am when he won't quit crying and I've changed, fed, burped, picked up, sang to him. It was especially hard while trying to breastfeed. Apparently, in another cosmic joke, I'm just not cut out to breast feed. I met with lactation consultants every day for 3 weeks, took supplements, pumped (with a Medela pump...so it wasn't a poor quality pump) and still couldn't sustain him. He went from 9 lbs 2 oz to 8 lbs 6 oz...or 8% of his birth weight. It would be nice to have someone here to help out.
Tia, for her part, is great. She adores him. Since I've last posted a real post, she has been diagnosed with Asperger's, which is on the milder side of the Autism spectrum. This was not a surprise. It is something I have suspected for years and have tried to get previous educators and counselors to address. It is now being addressed and she is improving. She has also reached 5'5 and started her period :( Unfortunately, she's growing up faster than I'd like.
Finally, the other big issue concerns the men in my life. Specifically, Rick, Steven and one who shall not be named. And no. It's not Daryle. He's not married. None of that. I'm just hesitant to name him because he does have an LJ and I really don't know how he feels....but I'll get to that.
Rick and Steven have both made remarks during this pregnancy that infuriate me. Rick was upset that I was 'cheating' on him (mind you...he got married 6 months before I got pregnant) and has called (with his wife present) and inquired about "his" kid. Steven, on the other hand, has made numerous statements that Isaiah "should be" his and that he wants a baby.
EXCUSE ME? BOTH of these men had years to make a move.
Rick asked me to move in with him multiple times, but each time I just about took him seriously, he'd start seeing some random chick. In fact, shortly after he met his wife (less than 1.5 years ago), he told me that if I really loved him, I'd move to be with him. Just as I was about to say yes...he tells me he's 'engaged' to this chick he's known less than 2 months.
Steven is the one who told me it would be a "relief" for me to start dating someone else. Never wanted to be bothered. I'd go weeks without hearing a word from him. Had his roommate boldface lie to me about whether he was there (his car was parked outside...I'm not stupid). Has always told me how he doesn't want a relationship. Especially not with me.
The final one is someone I've known for years. Admittedly, I was a bitch to him. But I don't know how he feels anymore. He has defended me when few others would. He has remained my friend when few others would. He is sexy, one of the smartest people I know, responsible, and funny. The question is how does he feel? Does he still want me, but is put off by what has happened in the past? Or is it too late? If it's the former, can I fix it and how? If it's the latter, how do I move on? I've tried. I've dated other people. I've tried to ignore him for months at a time. And, ultimately, I fail.
So, that's my life in a nutshell.