because she left

[lenguage]

I need to catalog her absence. I dropped her off at the airport at 5 AM this morning. I kissed her goodbye, I cried, we cried. She left without looking back. She never does.

I hope Emily succeeds. I think she will, but I am scared nevertheless. So much of my strength and all of my love has been put full-force into my relationship with her. I don't want an ounce of it back. I want her back, happy and healthy and ready for our life ahead.

But then the dove of hope began its downward slope
And I believed for a moment that my chances were
Approaching to be grabbed
But as it came down near, so did a weary tear
I thought it was a bird, but it was just a paper bag

Hunger hurts, and I want her so bad, oh it kills
'Cause I know I'm a mess she don't wanna clean up
I got to fold 'cause these hands are too shaky to hold
Hunger hurts, but starving works, when it costs too much to love

It may cost a lot to love her but she's worth it. Paperbag is the first song I remember hearing Emily sing, the two of us sitting on my bed, my head on her shoulder. I don't want to forget what she feels like in my arms.

I love her.