torn...
Hey,
I know I haven't updated in practically forever...
I'm just updating because I'm really torn right now and maybe typing it out and seeing it on the screen will help me figure out what to do.
Eric started school a couple weeks ago (YAY for him!)and is totally kicking ass.
The sucky thing is that he dropped down to part time at work. Sucky...
He wants to move in with his mom (not a bad idea in theory) to save money so he can focus on school and not have to worry when he has to do his externship. The thing that sucks about this is that she lives in a 2br condo. I do think this is a good idea so we can pay off our bills and save money and hopefully get me a new car. I think this is a great idea. The selfish part of me doesn't want to do it. We were talking about it as we were finishing the news and getting ready to go to sleep. I got really crabby and baisically told him to suck it up and work full time so we don't have to move. I just think that if we were to move in with his mom, that I would feel like a guest in her house. I think that would be the craziest condo in the world. Eric's mom, the two of us, and our two cats in a 2 bedroom condo. WOW! I don't know. I just don't think that we could make it on my income plus the couple hundred Eric gets every other week working part time. I've been looking for cheap apartments, but they pretty much don't exist.
I really don't want to have to move again. It seems like every time we move, we say that we are going to stay there until we get a house, then something changes and we end up having to move when the lease is up. I am getting really tired of that. I just want to stay put for more than a year.
I know I'm being totally selfish, especially because if we were to move I wouldn't do a whole lot of it, but I almost don't care.
I'm never going to get to sleep. I have all this shit on my mind now so I'm going to lay awake all night while Eric snores. That's why I decided to come in here and at least be productive.
I wish we could find a townhome or something that we could rent with someone. That way we could have the space but have someone to help with the burden of finances and what not. But since Eric's mom bought that condo, she is out of the picture.
I don't know what to do.
I really want to just drop everything and help Eric through school, but at the same time I don't want to because I went to school full time and worked damn near 60 hours a week and I survived. I pretty much said that to Eric and he got pissy so I came out here to the computer.
I had a shitty day so maybe this was just the straw that broke the camel's back.
I just don't fucking know anymore...
A couple of my co-workers are driving me batty...part of me want's to bring up how shitty they are being, and the other part of me just wants to leave it alone for fear of me getting the backlash for them being lazy. I guess I don't have the right to bitch.
I think I've bitched enough. I'm just really lonely. I never see Eric anymore and when I do he is snoring or hogging the bed. I don't see any of my friends anymore because they have all either moved away or don't return my phone calls.
I really need a mental health day but if I were to take a day off I think my boss would have a stroke.
Well, I think I'm going to TRY to go to sleep now. I have a consumer at 10 tomorrow morning that is really mentally and emotionally draining. Not to mention, I'm at 20 hours for the week and it's only Tuesday. Hopefully I don't go into overtime...
G'night
I know I haven't updated in practically forever...
I'm just updating because I'm really torn right now and maybe typing it out and seeing it on the screen will help me figure out what to do.
Eric started school a couple weeks ago (YAY for him!)and is totally kicking ass.
The sucky thing is that he dropped down to part time at work. Sucky...
He wants to move in with his mom (not a bad idea in theory) to save money so he can focus on school and not have to worry when he has to do his externship. The thing that sucks about this is that she lives in a 2br condo. I do think this is a good idea so we can pay off our bills and save money and hopefully get me a new car. I think this is a great idea. The selfish part of me doesn't want to do it. We were talking about it as we were finishing the news and getting ready to go to sleep. I got really crabby and baisically told him to suck it up and work full time so we don't have to move. I just think that if we were to move in with his mom, that I would feel like a guest in her house. I think that would be the craziest condo in the world. Eric's mom, the two of us, and our two cats in a 2 bedroom condo. WOW! I don't know. I just don't think that we could make it on my income plus the couple hundred Eric gets every other week working part time. I've been looking for cheap apartments, but they pretty much don't exist.
I really don't want to have to move again. It seems like every time we move, we say that we are going to stay there until we get a house, then something changes and we end up having to move when the lease is up. I am getting really tired of that. I just want to stay put for more than a year.
I know I'm being totally selfish, especially because if we were to move I wouldn't do a whole lot of it, but I almost don't care.
I'm never going to get to sleep. I have all this shit on my mind now so I'm going to lay awake all night while Eric snores. That's why I decided to come in here and at least be productive.
I wish we could find a townhome or something that we could rent with someone. That way we could have the space but have someone to help with the burden of finances and what not. But since Eric's mom bought that condo, she is out of the picture.
I don't know what to do.
I really want to just drop everything and help Eric through school, but at the same time I don't want to because I went to school full time and worked damn near 60 hours a week and I survived. I pretty much said that to Eric and he got pissy so I came out here to the computer.
I had a shitty day so maybe this was just the straw that broke the camel's back.
I just don't fucking know anymore...
A couple of my co-workers are driving me batty...part of me want's to bring up how shitty they are being, and the other part of me just wants to leave it alone for fear of me getting the backlash for them being lazy. I guess I don't have the right to bitch.
I think I've bitched enough. I'm just really lonely. I never see Eric anymore and when I do he is snoring or hogging the bed. I don't see any of my friends anymore because they have all either moved away or don't return my phone calls.
I really need a mental health day but if I were to take a day off I think my boss would have a stroke.
Well, I think I'm going to TRY to go to sleep now. I have a consumer at 10 tomorrow morning that is really mentally and emotionally draining. Not to mention, I'm at 20 hours for the week and it's only Tuesday. Hopefully I don't go into overtime...
G'night