Ong Noi
My granddad passed away early this morning... They said that he died in his sleep, and that's a comfort to hear. It's trully a blessing to know that he didn't die suffering from anything, but peacefully in his sleep due to old age. He started forgetting things and got weaker but still it wasn't too serious. I did wish that I was able to see him 1 last time. I was hoping for more time. Too bad that the last time I saw him it wasn't 1 of my best memories of him because he was getting irritated and snapped at everyone all the time. So I was disappointed that he was acting that way. I had many good memories of him though. He was open to me about how he loved me. Like I know that in asian culture or at least during my dad's generation and before that it's not common to express your feelings, but my granddad wasn't that way. He used to tell me how much he loved me and missed me, something that I never heard from my other grandpa and my dad only would say that if it was for something serious. That just made me love my granddad even more because he was different. He didn't care too much about formalities, or at least when it came to me. I adored him sooo... much. I hoped he remembered that.
Now I don't know what to do. If I should go back to Vietnam for the funeral or not. Part of me wants to and part of me doesn't. I don't want to go through that rush and stress of planning anything or be there if there's any disput what-so-ever. It's really hard to say with the family to keep everything calm and going smoothing without any arguments. Afterall this is the Nghiem family we're talking about. Also I don't think I could see it. In Vietnam it's not like here that we go to the funeral parlor and everything is done. Over there they do everything with you in the room. It just would be too much for me, absolutely overwhelming. Also over there there's just too much decisions to be made and I'm not up for it. Over here I don't need to think of a thing because I'm not 1 of the people that they would go to for that.
Now I don't know what to do. If I should go back to Vietnam for the funeral or not. Part of me wants to and part of me doesn't. I don't want to go through that rush and stress of planning anything or be there if there's any disput what-so-ever. It's really hard to say with the family to keep everything calm and going smoothing without any arguments. Afterall this is the Nghiem family we're talking about. Also I don't think I could see it. In Vietnam it's not like here that we go to the funeral parlor and everything is done. Over there they do everything with you in the room. It just would be too much for me, absolutely overwhelming. Also over there there's just too much decisions to be made and I'm not up for it. Over here I don't need to think of a thing because I'm not 1 of the people that they would go to for that.