(no subject)
As I write, sometimes (because I tend to skip around and write whatever scene comes to me at the time) I find that I have ideas from long ago that don't work anymore, or that i just don't want to use anymore. Usually, I just delete these scenes, maybe pasting a line of dialogue or a really good description into a different scene, and move on with my life. But sometimes, I feel like I don't want to lose what I wrote, even though it's just not going to fit into the narrative any longer. So, I present to you, a deleted scene from my Rapunzel fic. (Which I swear to GOD I am going to finish sometime in 2012.)
Waaaaaaay back when I first started this fic, I had the terribly original idea (not) of making it sound like Remus' illness was lycanthropy, when really it was teh gay. I have since decided that that is dumb (within the context of my story) and has been done much better by others. Also, there were only two places where it really was mentioned at all; one I altered to work in the story still, but this scene had to go. So please enjoy.
Remus laughed, and leaned back against a rock. He held the map up in front of his face, expecting it to be hard to see, but it was illuminated by the light from the nearly full moon. Remus swore quietly and sat up.
“What?” Sirius asked. “Is your map wrong? I knew we were lost.” He was grinning, not seriously concerned, but his smile changed to a perplexed look as Remus began scribbling on the side of his map. “Remus? Remus? What’s wrong? What are you scribbling?” When he got no response, Sirius scooted around the fire to lean over Remus’s shoulder and see what he was doing. Remus simultaneously became aware of two things: how close Sirius was to him, and how good he smelled. The latter was completely illogical, as they had been trekking through the wilderness for weeks on end, but it was true nonetheless.
Remus moved a little away from Sirius, and said, “it’s just that the moon is going to be full tomorrow night, and I don’t think we’re going to be to this village,” he indicated a dot on the map, “by then.”
“And?” Sirius asked, raising his eyebrows.
“And,” Remus sighed, and moved further away. “Well, you see, er, my… condition gets bad, well, worse, around the full moon.”
Sirius looked genuinely concerned. “Will you need a doctor? Is that why you want to be in a village?”
“No, it’s… it’s not like that, it’s just…” Remus couldn’t figure out how to say “It’s just that I can’t be alone with you in the forest, in the dark, during the full moon, because I don’t know if I’ll be able to control myself as much as I could last full moon when you were out drinking and wenching and not around me,” without scaring Sirius, so he lied instead. “It’s just not really… good for me to be… outside during the full moon. I mean, I can be, but it would be… preferable if we were in an inn tomorrow night.” In separate beds, and, even better, in separate rooms, he added to himself.
Sirius looked as though he were going to pursue the subject further, possibly ask what bizarre illness Remus had that necessitated him being inside during the full moon, but he seemed to remember on the verge of speaking that he had agreed not to. Instead, he said, “well, we’ll just have to pick up the pace and get you there by nightfall then.” Remus smiled at him, incredibly relieved.
It occurred to Remus that if Sirius was scared, he was hiding his fear very well. He seemed as nonchalant as ever, and he didn’t even retreat back to the other side of the fire, but stayed next to Remus looking at his calculations of what time they would have to leave in order to get there by nightfall. Remus wasn’t sure if he was imagining it or not, but Sirius’ hand seemed to touch his more than could be coincidental. Remus had no idea how to say that this possibly imagined thing was making him uncomfortable though, as he was pretty sure he was just noticing it more because of what time in the lunar cycle it was, so he ignored it as best he could and suggested that they go to bed soon in order to make their early start.
In addition to not really working, it's also not terribly well-written. It's good that it's gone. The scene I wrote to replace it is much better :)