I now know EVEN LESS!

[legendaerie_lt]

So.

I am now officially dating Steampunk Kid.

But - today I got an e-mail from Non-Shika.  It turns out that, yes, I did ask him out on Wednesday but he's still recovering from a painful relationship and doesn't really want to date right now.

Do I still like him?  Yes.

Do I regret my choice?  Never.

I would rather kill myself than hurt Steampunk Kid - he just makes me so giddy and happy, despite the lack of sparks.  Maybe we'll fizzle out and be just friends, but...

I don't think I could make it work with Non-Shika anyway.  If we're both still scarred, our sparks would just start a fire and we'd both end up worse than before.

Do I feel guilty for harboring feelings for both of them?  Yes.  But I know I made the right choice.  Steampunk Kid is sweet, he's hilarious, adorkable to the extreme, and he's here and now.  I can't - won't - toss aside something that makes me so happy for the faint hope that maybe one day I'd be happier.

I still feel oddly conflicted, but...

I'm happy.

I've gained a boyfriend and possibly another close friend, and I think things will turn out right.

Now I just have to write 7k words today to try to get back on track with NaNo.