Season 2
Season 2 of Grad Students
Episode 1
Josh and Kyle are in Cuba discussing Geoff's case with a very drunk judge. At one point several men in camo drop off a large briefcase filled with money and a note with a heart on it signed "Castro." The students picketing the jail are starting to get violent. Geoff is terrified of when the time comes that he has to take a shower. Sanjeet is digging a tunnel underneath the jail. Varun has nobody to prod. Tensions are running high. Jeet finally breaks into Geoff's cell (he still hasn't taken a shower since being shot through the sewer system) Geoff is ready to escape (if only from the smell) when the guards come by to take him to trial, they dont notice Jeet or the large hole in the center of the floor (and are forever clueless as to why future residents of that cell always escape) Geoff is led to court, but along the way the bus gets lost and he is late. The judge later blames this on him
Episode 2
Geoff is in court, the video monitor is showing a very drunk judge, Kyle and Josh's voices can be heard in the background "he's a slob"
"typical judge"
"Lawyers are vastly superior"
"...that aint saying much" suddenly 2 men in camo holding AK-47s enter the field of view. One man: "For betraying our humble leader, Castro, you are hereby sentenced to death" seeing an opportunity, Kyle acts quickly "hey, listen buddy, before you kill him, could you make him say this to that camera?" the soldier reads the statement Josh quickly scribbles onto a Cuban newspaper "sure, kid"
Judge "I find the rioter innocent and cleared of all charges, Red Sox win World Series!" [news travels slowly to Cuba]
"thanks a lot Mr Soldierman"
the camera pans up as the soldier flashes a perfect smile A sound of thunder is heard in the background
Episode 3
Due to heightened terror watches, Kyle and Josh are not allowed back into the US from Cuba. They decide to rent a dingy and row to the mainland, about 100 Cubans follow them. Geoff finally gets home from his ordeal to find the futon empty, he is sad he did not get to say goodbye to Varun, but is too tired to fret about it; he goes upstairs to his bed to find Varun camped out on it "Hey Geoff, could you get me a bucket... and some paper towels?"
"Oh no! This will not fly!" but Varun won't get up, Geoff sleeps on the basement futon
Next day at school Prof "Well, if you missed the past few weeks of class, theres only one thing you need to know and that is -" Geoff cannot hear because the student next to him erupts into a coughing fit
Sanjeet has fashioned himself a suit of armor which he wears everywhere; he is also training some engineers to be his henchmen; he makes them wear purple nylons
Episode 4
Ahmad, Geoff and Varun's friend from Colgate got a job in Dearborn doing IT work for a hospital, hes moving in and is going to take the 2nd futon in the basement (Geoff is on the first) they are both excited about being roommates
Kyle and Josh are picked up by the Coast Guard along with the now 1000s of Cuban refugees who followed them, and are taken back to Cuba (it is a good thing too, as they were rowing out to sea)
Prof: "the most important thing you need to understand today is-" the same student started coughing next to Geoff
Sanjeet has named his henchmen "the Foot Clan" and has promoted Varun to "Big Toe" while Jeet is in class. Varun holds meditation classes from Geoff's bed. Sanjeet is now bent on world domination, little does he know that his "Foot Clan" has come to revere Varun as their lord. Varun enjoys the pampering (they clean his buckets for him out of devotion)
Episode 5
Sanjeet, distraught about his "Foot Clan's" fondness for Varun orders them on a mission to see where their loyalties lie. He sends them to bring back "Gopher" the former next-door-neighbor's daughter's new cat which her father got her after "Turtle" her possum-shaped cat was killed by Sanjeet with a brick and a tree. Sanjeet does not specify "Dead or Alive"
Geoff sits in a different spot at lecture but the cougher still sits next to him. Prof "the take home message for today is-" [Cough]
Ahmad is enjoying his first day at work. Boss "Ahmad, the only rule we have around here is that the women are always right-" [he was brought up on sexual harassment charges] "-because they're so sexy" [many charges]
Kyle and Josh explain their situation to the Coast Guard who, after going through days of Catch-22 style red tape, decides to take them back to the US
Episode 6
Kyle and Josh get stuck in a hurricane which capsizes and sinks the Coast Guard ship. They end up being the only survivors who float onto Florida's shore (the rest of the crew are stranded on Key West and have to wait until the bridge is rebuilt to go home)
Ahmad's boss was finally fired for sexual harassment and Ahmad was made boss [this made several senior women at the company upset] Ahmad tried to refuse but the owner would not promote anyone else Owner: "It's a man's world, we cant have women in key positions can we?" Ahmad: "but ma'am... you're a woman" Owner: "ironic, isn't it?"
The cougher sits next to Geoff again Prof: "A question we always ask on the exam is-" [Cough]
Sanjeet's Foot Clan brought him back a cat that has been dead a long time; they had dug up "Turtle" Sanjeet dismisses them, so they shaved their heads and now hold a constant vigil with Varun disciple
Episode 7
Kyle and Josh walk to the closest airport and buy tickets to Detroit. Due to the hurricane, all flights are delayed
Ahmad assumes the job of Mr. Manager [we just say Manager] and does a very good job even though the owner keeps popping her nose into every aspect of the company [this will lead to her downfall]
Geoff arrives late to lecture and the only open seat is next to the cougher! Prof: "When you see a patient with these symptoms it can mean only one thing: [cough] diagnose it immediately and you will save a life"
Varun is enjoying his disciples constant affection; he begins speaking in tongues hoping they will think he has supernatural powers and perhaps form a new religion based on him after he is gone [back to Dallas, not dead]
Sanjeet was forced to ditch his suit of armor after taking a shower with it on... now has taken to dressing as a Pirate known simply as "The Captain"
Episode 8
Varun decides to name his new religion 'Futonism' his followers are the Futonites. They feel enlightenment can only be achieved from atop any variety of foldable couch. Geoff and Ahmad are worshiped as demigods because they both sleep on futons in the basement, the living room futon has been moved to Geoff's room for the Futonite that most pleases Varun that day
Geoff sits next to the cougher, Prof: "You're going to want to remember-" [cough]
Kyle and Josh finally get back and Geoff thanks them for helping him out of jail by taking them out to dinner; surprisingly, nothing goes wrong during this outing. When they get back, they discover some of Varun's prayer candles have set Geoff's bed on fire. The Futonites were able to put it out before Varun was forced off the bed
The Captain [Sanjeet] now walks around with a sword, a compass that doesn't point north and a pistol with only one shot in it
Episode 9
Varun's Futonites have begun an 11:34 am and pm mass in which they chant, they are not good. Varun finds this custom as annoying as the rest of us and asks them to stop. Some of them refuse; a new sect of Futonism is born
Ahmad is doing wonders for his company. The owner is getting in the middle of day-to-day affairs. The employees are sick of her constant unnecessary interruptions and harrassments. As a collective, the employees (without Ahmad's knowledge) sue the owner. Long story short, the judge decrees that the owner is 'unfit' to own a company and decided to give the company to Ahmad. This pleases the employees
The cougher strikes again, Prof: "The absolute most important thing I will ever teach you is-" [cough]
Kyle and Josh join the touch-football Law team. Josh tears his ACL
Sanjeet is building a boat [ship] out of the several trees he has previously felled
Episode 10
Ahmad is fast turning his small company into a fortune 500
Geoff is feeling sick but still goes to class, wouldnt you know it, he sits next to the cougher, Prof: "The syllabus says I have to teach this, but it is insignificant, it is totally a waste of time but-" [cough] This time it was Geoff who coughed. The Cougher: "I'm sorry could you repeat that, this guy next to me coughed and I couldn't hear you." Prof: "He disturbed you? Son, what is your name?" [in front of a full lecture hall and the lecture is being recorded and posted on the internets] "me?... Geoff Siegel, why?" Prof: "Stand up! What is wrong with you, you need to be more considerate of other people, maybe you've chosen the wrong profession! Get out of my auditorium right now!" Geoff: "But... what?"
Sanjeet is sailing down the freeway on his new ship, he has hoisted his Jolly Roger. Cars are honking
Episode 11
Sanjeet sank his boat [ship] in the Detroit River, he escaped without getting wet by walking from the Crow's Nest directly onto a passing boat. It was really cool
Kyle and Josh win their touch-football game, but Kyle breaks an ankle and Josh tears his other ACL
Ahmad to employees: "we can make this company really great but it's going to require a lot of hard work, a lot of staying late. If you can't handle that, feel free to leave now, I will write you good recommendations, but I believe we can really do something here! Who's with me?" Not an employee leaves
The new Radical sect of Futonism has moved the futon back to the living room and are threatening to sacrifice themselves on it by drinking tainted tang. Varun, sick of this new sect, is egging them on with his [sacred] prodder but everyone else is worried about the mess/paperwork they will have to fill out if this mass suicide takes place
Episode 12
Heather, Geoff's friend from Colgate, has an overnight layover in Detroit and calls him up to see if she can crash at his place. He agrees and makes the radical futonites go home to clear up the living room futon. They do so, but are not happy about it, they take their tang with them. Varun is relieved to be rid of the radicals as they are the ones who tend to muck everything up. When Heather arrives it is still early and she and Geoff can't think of anything to do. Geoff suggests watching Stargate the movie and then subsequent TV show. Heather likes this plan. Ahmad stays the night at his company. Kyle and Josh spend the night pretending to work at the library while playing flag football in the aisles with law books. The librarians are not amused, one of them tears an ACL going for a hail mary to win the game, this was remarkable as no score was being kept and there were no organized teams so much as there was unorganized chaos
Episode 13
Geoff comes home to find Heather still watching Season 1 of Stargate. "didnt you have a plane to catch?" "its ok I'll rebook it, I still have 8 seasons to go" Ahmad comes home triumphantly, his company is planning to go public and some market analysts on Wall St. are predicting it will be the next Google. Sanjeet, having ditched his pirate garb, is now experimenting in the occult looking for an elixir of life. Kyle dares to venture into Jeet's crypt beneath the street to ask if he wants any pizza, he emerged several hours later dazed, confused, and his hair a shade of day-glo pink. He had Josh deliver 2 slices to Jeet's lair, when he did not return promptly, everyone decided to just wait longer. Varun is getting bored on Geoff's bed with his remaining loyalists, and is now upset that Heather is occupying his previous home (the futon) (of course she has the decency to get up to use the washroom when necessary)
Episode 14
Josh finally emerges from Sanjeets lair carrying a small bit of plumbing made of gold. Kyles day-glo pink hair wont wash off and dyes dont stick to it. Varun is getting bored being out of the loop and has begun his assault on Heather, using his sacred prodder, in an attempt to get her to leave so he can retake the futon. Heather will have none of that, and takes the prodder away from him. Shes now on season 2 of Stargate. Jeet briefly turned himself into a man-sized possum, but the potion wore off before he was able to look into a mirror and verify his success. Geoffs biochem prof holds up new textbook: "all you have to do is know everything in this book and you'll pass... oh, by the way there are a lot of errors in it and it was poorly edited you'll have to figure out whats right" students nod in zombie-agreement, Geoff: "but... what?!" Ahmads company goes public tomorrow, there is no coffee left in the house
Episode 15
The talk of the world is Ahmad's company setting all sorts of records on the stock market. Nobody concerned with this story, save Ahmad, knows what the company actually does. Sanjeet has inadvertantly invented a machine to turn lead into gold. The only lead he could find readily involved the plumbing system. There is no water pressure in the house and the basement is a pond. Sanjeet decided that he does not like gold, so he destroyed his machine. Heather is starting Season 3 of Stargate and has been heard muttering things like "Jack is awesome" and "Senator Kinsey is a [insert appropriate Cantonese/French/German swear word here]" Kyle has shaved off his head to get rid of the pink. It started snowing and Thanksgiving is tomorrow, Sanjeet is convinced that cooking the turkey overnight at 500F is the way to go. Josh, still holding his gold pipe, agrees. Geoff doesn't want to argue, he has his Ramen ready.
Episode 16
The turkey, in the oven all night and most of Thanksgiving day is more than burnt, it looks like a hockey puck, the leg and wing bones actually turned to dust and faded away. Sanjeet says this is no problem and takes the carbon mass to his subbasement, 10 minutes and an earth-shattering explosion later he emerges with an absolutely perfectly cooked Turkey. Geoff is skeptical and does not eat. Later the Detroit Local News' top story tells of a medical student who saves half a dozen lives. While everyone is recovering after dinner, they all enjoy Season 3 of Stargate. Inevitably, someone asks everyone to say what they're thankful for: in no particular order: "malleable laws of physics" "gullible airlines" "New York Stock Exchange" "fake hair" "orthopedic surgeons" "soft sheets and adequate treatment of bedsores" Happy Thanksgiving to all, and to all a good night!
Episode 1
Josh and Kyle are in Cuba discussing Geoff's case with a very drunk judge. At one point several men in camo drop off a large briefcase filled with money and a note with a heart on it signed "Castro." The students picketing the jail are starting to get violent. Geoff is terrified of when the time comes that he has to take a shower. Sanjeet is digging a tunnel underneath the jail. Varun has nobody to prod. Tensions are running high. Jeet finally breaks into Geoff's cell (he still hasn't taken a shower since being shot through the sewer system) Geoff is ready to escape (if only from the smell) when the guards come by to take him to trial, they dont notice Jeet or the large hole in the center of the floor (and are forever clueless as to why future residents of that cell always escape) Geoff is led to court, but along the way the bus gets lost and he is late. The judge later blames this on him
Episode 2
Geoff is in court, the video monitor is showing a very drunk judge, Kyle and Josh's voices can be heard in the background "he's a slob"
"typical judge"
"Lawyers are vastly superior"
"...that aint saying much" suddenly 2 men in camo holding AK-47s enter the field of view. One man: "For betraying our humble leader, Castro, you are hereby sentenced to death" seeing an opportunity, Kyle acts quickly "hey, listen buddy, before you kill him, could you make him say this to that camera?" the soldier reads the statement Josh quickly scribbles onto a Cuban newspaper "sure, kid"
Judge "I find the rioter innocent and cleared of all charges, Red Sox win World Series!" [news travels slowly to Cuba]
"thanks a lot Mr Soldierman"
the camera pans up as the soldier flashes a perfect smile A sound of thunder is heard in the background
Episode 3
Due to heightened terror watches, Kyle and Josh are not allowed back into the US from Cuba. They decide to rent a dingy and row to the mainland, about 100 Cubans follow them. Geoff finally gets home from his ordeal to find the futon empty, he is sad he did not get to say goodbye to Varun, but is too tired to fret about it; he goes upstairs to his bed to find Varun camped out on it "Hey Geoff, could you get me a bucket... and some paper towels?"
"Oh no! This will not fly!" but Varun won't get up, Geoff sleeps on the basement futon
Next day at school Prof "Well, if you missed the past few weeks of class, theres only one thing you need to know and that is -" Geoff cannot hear because the student next to him erupts into a coughing fit
Sanjeet has fashioned himself a suit of armor which he wears everywhere; he is also training some engineers to be his henchmen; he makes them wear purple nylons
Episode 4
Ahmad, Geoff and Varun's friend from Colgate got a job in Dearborn doing IT work for a hospital, hes moving in and is going to take the 2nd futon in the basement (Geoff is on the first) they are both excited about being roommates
Kyle and Josh are picked up by the Coast Guard along with the now 1000s of Cuban refugees who followed them, and are taken back to Cuba (it is a good thing too, as they were rowing out to sea)
Prof: "the most important thing you need to understand today is-" the same student started coughing next to Geoff
Sanjeet has named his henchmen "the Foot Clan" and has promoted Varun to "Big Toe" while Jeet is in class. Varun holds meditation classes from Geoff's bed. Sanjeet is now bent on world domination, little does he know that his "Foot Clan" has come to revere Varun as their lord. Varun enjoys the pampering (they clean his buckets for him out of devotion)
Episode 5
Sanjeet, distraught about his "Foot Clan's" fondness for Varun orders them on a mission to see where their loyalties lie. He sends them to bring back "Gopher" the former next-door-neighbor's daughter's new cat which her father got her after "Turtle" her possum-shaped cat was killed by Sanjeet with a brick and a tree. Sanjeet does not specify "Dead or Alive"
Geoff sits in a different spot at lecture but the cougher still sits next to him. Prof "the take home message for today is-" [Cough]
Ahmad is enjoying his first day at work. Boss "Ahmad, the only rule we have around here is that the women are always right-" [he was brought up on sexual harassment charges] "-because they're so sexy" [many charges]
Kyle and Josh explain their situation to the Coast Guard who, after going through days of Catch-22 style red tape, decides to take them back to the US
Episode 6
Kyle and Josh get stuck in a hurricane which capsizes and sinks the Coast Guard ship. They end up being the only survivors who float onto Florida's shore (the rest of the crew are stranded on Key West and have to wait until the bridge is rebuilt to go home)
Ahmad's boss was finally fired for sexual harassment and Ahmad was made boss [this made several senior women at the company upset] Ahmad tried to refuse but the owner would not promote anyone else Owner: "It's a man's world, we cant have women in key positions can we?" Ahmad: "but ma'am... you're a woman" Owner: "ironic, isn't it?"
The cougher sits next to Geoff again Prof: "A question we always ask on the exam is-" [Cough]
Sanjeet's Foot Clan brought him back a cat that has been dead a long time; they had dug up "Turtle" Sanjeet dismisses them, so they shaved their heads and now hold a constant vigil with Varun disciple
Episode 7
Kyle and Josh walk to the closest airport and buy tickets to Detroit. Due to the hurricane, all flights are delayed
Ahmad assumes the job of Mr. Manager [we just say Manager] and does a very good job even though the owner keeps popping her nose into every aspect of the company [this will lead to her downfall]
Geoff arrives late to lecture and the only open seat is next to the cougher! Prof: "When you see a patient with these symptoms it can mean only one thing: [cough] diagnose it immediately and you will save a life"
Varun is enjoying his disciples constant affection; he begins speaking in tongues hoping they will think he has supernatural powers and perhaps form a new religion based on him after he is gone [back to Dallas, not dead]
Sanjeet was forced to ditch his suit of armor after taking a shower with it on... now has taken to dressing as a Pirate known simply as "The Captain"
Episode 8
Varun decides to name his new religion 'Futonism' his followers are the Futonites. They feel enlightenment can only be achieved from atop any variety of foldable couch. Geoff and Ahmad are worshiped as demigods because they both sleep on futons in the basement, the living room futon has been moved to Geoff's room for the Futonite that most pleases Varun that day
Geoff sits next to the cougher, Prof: "You're going to want to remember-" [cough]
Kyle and Josh finally get back and Geoff thanks them for helping him out of jail by taking them out to dinner; surprisingly, nothing goes wrong during this outing. When they get back, they discover some of Varun's prayer candles have set Geoff's bed on fire. The Futonites were able to put it out before Varun was forced off the bed
The Captain [Sanjeet] now walks around with a sword, a compass that doesn't point north and a pistol with only one shot in it
Episode 9
Varun's Futonites have begun an 11:34 am and pm mass in which they chant, they are not good. Varun finds this custom as annoying as the rest of us and asks them to stop. Some of them refuse; a new sect of Futonism is born
Ahmad is doing wonders for his company. The owner is getting in the middle of day-to-day affairs. The employees are sick of her constant unnecessary interruptions and harrassments. As a collective, the employees (without Ahmad's knowledge) sue the owner. Long story short, the judge decrees that the owner is 'unfit' to own a company and decided to give the company to Ahmad. This pleases the employees
The cougher strikes again, Prof: "The absolute most important thing I will ever teach you is-" [cough]
Kyle and Josh join the touch-football Law team. Josh tears his ACL
Sanjeet is building a boat [ship] out of the several trees he has previously felled
Episode 10
Ahmad is fast turning his small company into a fortune 500
Geoff is feeling sick but still goes to class, wouldnt you know it, he sits next to the cougher, Prof: "The syllabus says I have to teach this, but it is insignificant, it is totally a waste of time but-" [cough] This time it was Geoff who coughed. The Cougher: "I'm sorry could you repeat that, this guy next to me coughed and I couldn't hear you." Prof: "He disturbed you? Son, what is your name?" [in front of a full lecture hall and the lecture is being recorded and posted on the internets] "me?... Geoff Siegel, why?" Prof: "Stand up! What is wrong with you, you need to be more considerate of other people, maybe you've chosen the wrong profession! Get out of my auditorium right now!" Geoff: "But... what?"
Sanjeet is sailing down the freeway on his new ship, he has hoisted his Jolly Roger. Cars are honking
Episode 11
Sanjeet sank his boat [ship] in the Detroit River, he escaped without getting wet by walking from the Crow's Nest directly onto a passing boat. It was really cool
Kyle and Josh win their touch-football game, but Kyle breaks an ankle and Josh tears his other ACL
Ahmad to employees: "we can make this company really great but it's going to require a lot of hard work, a lot of staying late. If you can't handle that, feel free to leave now, I will write you good recommendations, but I believe we can really do something here! Who's with me?" Not an employee leaves
The new Radical sect of Futonism has moved the futon back to the living room and are threatening to sacrifice themselves on it by drinking tainted tang. Varun, sick of this new sect, is egging them on with his [sacred] prodder but everyone else is worried about the mess/paperwork they will have to fill out if this mass suicide takes place
Episode 12
Heather, Geoff's friend from Colgate, has an overnight layover in Detroit and calls him up to see if she can crash at his place. He agrees and makes the radical futonites go home to clear up the living room futon. They do so, but are not happy about it, they take their tang with them. Varun is relieved to be rid of the radicals as they are the ones who tend to muck everything up. When Heather arrives it is still early and she and Geoff can't think of anything to do. Geoff suggests watching Stargate the movie and then subsequent TV show. Heather likes this plan. Ahmad stays the night at his company. Kyle and Josh spend the night pretending to work at the library while playing flag football in the aisles with law books. The librarians are not amused, one of them tears an ACL going for a hail mary to win the game, this was remarkable as no score was being kept and there were no organized teams so much as there was unorganized chaos
Episode 13
Geoff comes home to find Heather still watching Season 1 of Stargate. "didnt you have a plane to catch?" "its ok I'll rebook it, I still have 8 seasons to go" Ahmad comes home triumphantly, his company is planning to go public and some market analysts on Wall St. are predicting it will be the next Google. Sanjeet, having ditched his pirate garb, is now experimenting in the occult looking for an elixir of life. Kyle dares to venture into Jeet's crypt beneath the street to ask if he wants any pizza, he emerged several hours later dazed, confused, and his hair a shade of day-glo pink. He had Josh deliver 2 slices to Jeet's lair, when he did not return promptly, everyone decided to just wait longer. Varun is getting bored on Geoff's bed with his remaining loyalists, and is now upset that Heather is occupying his previous home (the futon) (of course she has the decency to get up to use the washroom when necessary)
Episode 14
Josh finally emerges from Sanjeets lair carrying a small bit of plumbing made of gold. Kyles day-glo pink hair wont wash off and dyes dont stick to it. Varun is getting bored being out of the loop and has begun his assault on Heather, using his sacred prodder, in an attempt to get her to leave so he can retake the futon. Heather will have none of that, and takes the prodder away from him. Shes now on season 2 of Stargate. Jeet briefly turned himself into a man-sized possum, but the potion wore off before he was able to look into a mirror and verify his success. Geoffs biochem prof holds up new textbook: "all you have to do is know everything in this book and you'll pass... oh, by the way there are a lot of errors in it and it was poorly edited you'll have to figure out whats right" students nod in zombie-agreement, Geoff: "but... what?!" Ahmads company goes public tomorrow, there is no coffee left in the house
Episode 15
The talk of the world is Ahmad's company setting all sorts of records on the stock market. Nobody concerned with this story, save Ahmad, knows what the company actually does. Sanjeet has inadvertantly invented a machine to turn lead into gold. The only lead he could find readily involved the plumbing system. There is no water pressure in the house and the basement is a pond. Sanjeet decided that he does not like gold, so he destroyed his machine. Heather is starting Season 3 of Stargate and has been heard muttering things like "Jack is awesome" and "Senator Kinsey is a [insert appropriate Cantonese/French/German swear word here]" Kyle has shaved off his head to get rid of the pink. It started snowing and Thanksgiving is tomorrow, Sanjeet is convinced that cooking the turkey overnight at 500F is the way to go. Josh, still holding his gold pipe, agrees. Geoff doesn't want to argue, he has his Ramen ready.
Episode 16
The turkey, in the oven all night and most of Thanksgiving day is more than burnt, it looks like a hockey puck, the leg and wing bones actually turned to dust and faded away. Sanjeet says this is no problem and takes the carbon mass to his subbasement, 10 minutes and an earth-shattering explosion later he emerges with an absolutely perfectly cooked Turkey. Geoff is skeptical and does not eat. Later the Detroit Local News' top story tells of a medical student who saves half a dozen lives. While everyone is recovering after dinner, they all enjoy Season 3 of Stargate. Inevitably, someone asks everyone to say what they're thankful for: in no particular order: "malleable laws of physics" "gullible airlines" "New York Stock Exchange" "fake hair" "orthopedic surgeons" "soft sheets and adequate treatment of bedsores" Happy Thanksgiving to all, and to all a good night!