(no subject)
i slipped again.
im back up now but still.
i cant believe i let myself get like that again.
i think i can look deeper this time to try and figure out why.
maybe its because i feel like im lost or hopeless or something.
i know that sounds pathetic but itl change.
it sucks because ive said i was done, so i even have trouble believing myself, and that scares the shit out of me.
but no more.
ive got to take control of my life. im tired of being disconnected from everything and everyone. i want to suck it all up. life has so much to offer even if sometimes it dosnt seem that way. i keep shutting everyone and everything out. thats not the kind of life i want to live.
thats no way to live life.
maybe its because theres alot of shit to do and i just want to push it all away. im just going to man up and do some shit.
things WILL get better. im changing.
im back up now but still.
i cant believe i let myself get like that again.
i think i can look deeper this time to try and figure out why.
maybe its because i feel like im lost or hopeless or something.
i know that sounds pathetic but itl change.
it sucks because ive said i was done, so i even have trouble believing myself, and that scares the shit out of me.
but no more.
ive got to take control of my life. im tired of being disconnected from everything and everyone. i want to suck it all up. life has so much to offer even if sometimes it dosnt seem that way. i keep shutting everyone and everything out. thats not the kind of life i want to live.
thats no way to live life.
maybe its because theres alot of shit to do and i just want to push it all away. im just going to man up and do some shit.
things WILL get better. im changing.