(no subject)
I just realized that i have three calenders. Weird...
My mother called me yesterday. She told me that Laura is pregnant. I am praying that she isn't, that the test was wrong, that the medicine changed it. Anything anything at all. I can't be with her this time. I don't know what impact my being with her the first time, had on her, but I love her so much and she is my sister. I have lost my best friend God. I gave up on you God last night. I am sorry. I know that you give her and me the strength to get through, the strength to perservere. Lord creator of heaven and earth, allow me to grow closer to you, in my understanding and love of you Lord. It is so hard for me right now to understand what is going on God. It is hard for me to wake up and go to sleep knowing that all of this is happening at home and i can't help. I can't even help my mother. Why does bad news have to be by phone. I need a good news/ bad news caller ID. My brother wants to go to BGSU. i'm excited. Grandpa will pay, and shawn will be able to go to school.
I am going out tonight. on the one hand, i am so excited that i could jump around and shout, on the other...i hate mystery and this guy is shrouded in it. mmnnn..he's nice. Mis. introduced us. amazing isnt it? i can't gt away from Muslim guys, i don't know what my problem is. I haven't dated or gone out w/ a white guy since i got here.for someone that talks as much and is as socialable as I am, i really don't want to go out and do stuff. I think that midterms are killing me.ladeda...i want to listen to papa roach again...
My mother called me yesterday. She told me that Laura is pregnant. I am praying that she isn't, that the test was wrong, that the medicine changed it. Anything anything at all. I can't be with her this time. I don't know what impact my being with her the first time, had on her, but I love her so much and she is my sister. I have lost my best friend God. I gave up on you God last night. I am sorry. I know that you give her and me the strength to get through, the strength to perservere. Lord creator of heaven and earth, allow me to grow closer to you, in my understanding and love of you Lord. It is so hard for me right now to understand what is going on God. It is hard for me to wake up and go to sleep knowing that all of this is happening at home and i can't help. I can't even help my mother. Why does bad news have to be by phone. I need a good news/ bad news caller ID. My brother wants to go to BGSU. i'm excited. Grandpa will pay, and shawn will be able to go to school.
I am going out tonight. on the one hand, i am so excited that i could jump around and shout, on the other...i hate mystery and this guy is shrouded in it. mmnnn..he's nice. Mis. introduced us. amazing isnt it? i can't gt away from Muslim guys, i don't know what my problem is. I haven't dated or gone out w/ a white guy since i got here.for someone that talks as much and is as socialable as I am, i really don't want to go out and do stuff. I think that midterms are killing me.ladeda...i want to listen to papa roach again...