Like Ships at Sea... (4/5)
Title: Like Ships at Sea... (4/5)
Pairing: Akame
Word count: ~35000
Rating: NC-17
Genre/Warnings: AU, angst, fluff, smut (and everything in between).
Disclaimer: This story is a product of my imagination. Any parallels with real persons or events are pure coincidence.
Notes:Initially written for green_feelings on kizuna_exchange.
Many thanks to my wonderful, wonderful beta, who not only corrected my mistakes but generally was everything an author may need in the process of writing - the first audience, the steady hand that lead me through a series of inevitable panic attacks and generally made it possible for my fic to be finally completed. ladyc2, my dear, my gratitude goes beyond any simple thanks, I only hope that the whole process was not only a hard labor but also somewhat enjoyable to you too!.
Summary: Leaving on a cruise Jin hoped for a light holiday romance to inspire him in his song-writing.
Previous
Jin wakes up when his laptop hits him on the shoulder. It is turned off, thankfully, and even closed, so nothing breaks. Jin will have a nice bruise over his shoulder blade, that's all.
They decided to have a little nap before going up for dinner, or rather supper perhaps, because the dinner was starting fifteen minutes after they arrived, but with how drenched they were by a rather cold rain and both of them feeling more tired than hungry, a hot shower and nice nap under a warm comforter seemed just the recipe. Whoever wakes first knocks on the other's door, and if there is no answer (and Kame felt reasonably skeptical in his ability to wake a soundly sleeping Jin by a simple door-knocking, despite all Jin's petulant whines to the contrary and about how it worked just fine in the morning), repeat, if there is no answer, just wait some time and then knock again.
Now, well, Jin's roused by the jumping laptop, and once he sits up he discovers the reason for such an occurrence: the ship is rolling heavily on the waves, and it's kind of surprising that his laptop is actually the only thing that fell. Then again, what else could have fallen? The heavier pieces of the furniture are all immobile, firmly connected to the floor and walls, and the mobile ones, such as chairs, are designed in that special way that makes them slide rather than fall.
That is somehow reassuring - this ship is made in view of weather like this, and it is so big and sturdy, and even the way it lurches feels somehow reluctant and safe. Besides, if the captain thought the storm might be dangerous, he could have just waited it out in Valetta harbor.
Now that Jin's sort of established that it is safe, he thinks that it's kind of fun. Almost like some roller-coaster of a milder variety: left, right, left, right, up aaaand down. It's kind of exciting and he dies to see how it all looks from an open deck.
He knocks on Kame's door on his way up to see if the turtle is awake already, but obviously Kame doesn't have jumping laptops to wake him up and no sound comes from behind his door. Alright then, Jin will just have a smoke outside, check out the storm for himself, and then he will try again.
The elevators don't work, and it sort of makes sense, since they would only rattle inside the shaft with this kind of listing, and going upstairs by foot is another new adventure that Jin finds “fun”, so long as he maintains a firm grip on the railings, almost like being in an... elevator, exactly, that goes alternately up and down right under his feet.
The storm is... wow! Just - wow! It's certainly something Jin has never experienced before. The waves, the howling of the wind, the water spray flying up and over not only this deck but probably the one over it as well. He makes himself a mental reminder that he will have to put on his parka when he goes up again, because the hoody doesn't save him at all, neither from the wind nor the spray.
It's nature at its most primal, it's most violent, and it's a kind of exhilaration he just dies to share with Kame.
***
This time there is a shuffle behind the door when he knocks, and then the handle turns and he's greeted with the sight of his turtle, barefooted and clad in rumpled t-shirt and equally rumpled sweat-pants, and looking like hell. Looking like he is really ill, actually.
“Sorry, Jin... I'm afraid I can't keep you company, I'm afraid... I'm not feeling too well...”
It is the understatement of the year, he is greenish pale and sweating a little, and Jin's mother-hen instinct kicks immediately into full gear.
“What's wrong? Is it because you've overexerted yourself today? Or do you have a fever because of the rain?” he fires in quick succession, his brain succumbing to something akin to panic with all the worst case scenarios.
“Nothing of the kind,” Kame tries to smile, but the smile comes out more like a grimace and he presses his hand over his mouth and nose for a moment, and then breathes out heavily, “I'm just feeling sick... really sick... because of all that...” He makes a vague gesture imitating the hither and thither rolling of the ship. “Don't you feel it at all?”
Oh... Oh! That's the proverbial coin-drop, most surely. So Kame is seasick. Well, this is one area of medicine that Jin feels himself a proper expert in. Not personally, mind you - he's never felt even a twinge of any motion sickness in his life, but a friend's small daughter suffered from it really badly, and Jin, who doted on the girl, spent nights searching the Internet for some remedy and in the end a combination of his suggestions and prescribed medicine worked enough to allow the poor child to at least go for a boat-ride across the Channel with her parents.
“Have you taken any pills for it?” He questions at once, sounding all efficient, like a proper doctor in charge.
Kame's answering head-shake carries a tinge of slight exasperation, of 'I'm already sick, do you need to ask stupid questions as well?' And then the ship lurches and Jin has to catch Kame by the shoulder when he nearly stumbles forward, and it's a sure sign of how weak he feels right now that he doesn't shake immediately out of Jin's grip, but allows him to hold himself upright for a moment while his free hand flies to cover the mouth again.
“No. No pills,” he answers when the nausea passes, “I'm not that seasick usually, as you might have noticed. Actually, I only felt this bad once, and I was barely ten back then.”
“The doctor should have some,” Jin contemplates the possibilities. “But really we should take you outside first. There is fresh air, and it might really help if you see that we are rolling with the sea and not just feel it.”
“Jin,” this time Kame dislodges Jin's hand from his shoulder finally, and just leans wearily on the opened door. “Thanks for your readiness to help, but I'd really rather just stay here.”
Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) for Kame, it is a rare occurrence where Jin actually knows what he is speaking about, and he's not taking “no” for an answer, even though his heart lurches stronger than any ship in storm at the sight of just how tired and sick the turtle looks.
“Can you,” he asks, “can you just trust me, this once? I read about it a lot, for a friend's daughter, who couldn't even step on a ship before. It helped her, so it might help you, isn't that what you told me in the morning? And if it doesn't, I'll go and bring you medicine from the doctor. Agreed?”
There is a glimmer of real interest, of hope on Kame's tired face, as he nods slightly.
“It did help her, really?”
“Yes,” and Jin is already past Kame and into his cabin, searching for something warm for the turtle to put on to go on deck, even as he speaks. “Doctors say, it's all in the head, the whole motion sickness thing.” Here is his blue woolen cardigan, which wouldn't help any more than Jin's hoody did, but his coat is still water-logged from the earlier rain, and the thin long-coat he finds on the hanger is just too thin, sooo, the woolen cardigan it is then, “Your brain feels the motion, but your eyes only see everything good and stable, here inside the cabin... No, no, don't bend, it's bad for both your sprained side and the sickness, just put your foot inside the boot and I'll do the zipper. So your body thinks - something is wrong with the brain, maybe it is some kind of toxins inside your system, et voila, it decides to purge the system!”
Jin doesn't know how much of what he says registers with the turtle, he's only aware that his diatribe distracts Kame from his condition long enough for Jin to put the cardigan on him, fasten his boots and once he drops the key-card inside Kame's pocket - they are all set to go.
The turtle follows him listlessly and blindly, without really looking where he is going, and almost decides to turn back when he learns that the elevators are out of order and there are stairs to climb. It takes Jin whispering “trust me” into his ear, and then guiding him gently but relentlessly up the steps, ready to catch him at any moment if Kame stumbles, and still the turtle grows paler for each flight of stairs they take. The more so the higher they climb.
And then he finds his strength quite suddenly when they finally reach the first deck with the outside opening and actually lunges forward from Jin's supporting arm to quickly disappear inside the public loo, too quickly for Jin to properly react. So Jin only enters it a few moments later - to the sounds of someone hurling his heart out in the nearest cabin. Which may be Kame, but then there are similar sounds from the cabin further to his left and Jin pauses undecided.
His indecision is resolved however when a greenish looking stranger emerges from the cabin closest to him, splashes some water on his face and proceeds out seemingly unaware of Jin standing there at all. The other one is Kame then.
He tugs on the door-knob experimentally, and it turns out to be unlocked, and upon a look inside Jin can understand why - his first reaction to either look quickly away or follow suit... let's say, the cleaning staff will have a really nasty shift come tomorrow. But there is the turtle, looking lost and disoriented, and slightly shocked by the mess he created (everywhere... just everywhere), and Jin tugs lightly on his clean hand, leads him outside and closes the door firmly before he even speaks.
“Are you alright? I mean, do you need to... uh... puke again?”
A slight head-shake is an answer to this question, Kame is probably still shell-shocked by his “misbehavior” or maybe listening intently to a “gut reaction” to the question Jin posed.
“Well, wash your hand then, and, well, gurgle... you'll feel better for it.”
Jin himself uses a wet paper towel to try and wash off at least the brightest of speckles from the side of the cardigan that was... well, that was nearest to the “splash”. All is for the best, he thinks to distract himself from his task; at least Kame doesn't seem as pale as a few moments ago...
They aren't out of the loo for more than five steps though, when the turtle makes as if he wants to turn back, but this time Jin is unrelenting and virtually pushes him a few steps towards the sliding door and then through it and onto the deck.
“Come on, let's try the deck first! And if you feel like continuing after that, you can just do it over the railing, the way they do it in all those adventure stories. Don't need to worry where it gets either. It's all just gonna get washed right off by the sea-water anyway...”
And, hey, they are out on the deck, and the turtle just breathes heavily, almost drinks the wind in his desperation (“Look at the waves, look how we move,” Jin advises), and Jin can tell the exact moment when his frame relaxes imperceptibly and he doesn't feel like “hurling it up immediately” any more.
That's all good, but the sea is as rough, the wind as biting, and the water-spray flying as high as Jin remembers from his earlier visit. And Kame shivers inside his cardigan, whether from cold or from the aftereffects of his seasickness, and the cardigan is too thin and not at all waterproof, but what worries Jin more are his really, really thin sweatpants, which are no shield from weather such as this at all. That, and the fact that he can't seem to find the equilibrium as easily as Jin does, especially with his eyes closing involuntarily in an exhausted relief.
There is no other way, Jin thinks, as he shrugs out of his parka, then out of his hoody, and back into his parka again. The turtle nearly jumps in surprise when he wraps the hoody's arms around his waist from behind and then lowers himself to zip it into something resembling a longish skirt around the turtle's legs.
“I'm not a girl,” Kame objects with a little smile, which is nothing at all compared to his usual contagious grins, but it is the first proper smile Jin has seen on his face since they parted after the journey.
“I know,” Jin confirms from where he's crouched in front of him, “believe me, I do.”
And then he does what he just has to do, which is the wisest thing he can come up with given the moment, and something that Kame will probably object to till no end. He stands up and pulls the turtle into his embrace, connecting the sides of his still opened parka as best as he can (which is too wide, as all Jin's clothes tend to be, just wide enough for both of them to fit in) and wrapping his arms tightly around Kame's waist in preparation to the inevitable reaction.
“What!” Kame huffs indignantly, and he pushes quite hard against Jin's chest for someone who seems so exhausted. “I'm. Not. A. Girl.”
“And I know it,” Jin ascertains again, though in a milder, conciliatory tone, “but you are cold, and my parka is waterproof, and we will both be warmer this way,” he refrains from pointing out that the turtle can barely stand straight either, just spreads his own legs wider for better purchase and tugs the turtle back close to himself.
“If you turn your face to the side and lay your head on my shoulder,” he continues, “you will have all the fresh air you need, while staying nice and warm. Is that bad?”
“But what if someone sees us?” There is another push, and it's good that Jin has foreseen this question and has the answer prepared.
“The only ones out here in this weather would be those that feel as bad as you do. Do you think they will notice or care who else is here besides them?”
Kame seems to contemplate it for a moment, his body stiff and unyielding, but then it sort of sags against Jin's, allowing him to carry at least a part of the turtle's weight, as he apparently comes to a decision. And when his head drops onto Jin's shoulder as well, it's a sure sign for Jin, just how tired and weak the turtle feels, as well as a silent admission that he too doesn't truly care in his state whether they can be seen or judged.
“You know,” Kame mumbles after a while, so quietly that Jin has to strain his ears to decipher it around the howling of the wind and the constant booming of waves against the ship's hull, “it's really the first time I’ve had it as bad as back then. I just turned ten, and my parents took me to an amusement park. Only it turned out not all that amusing. It was the roller-coasters. The one that went just up and down in more or less a straight line was still bearable, and I didn't want to tell them I wasn't feeling up for the other one, because this whole trip, it was supposed to be my birthday present and they were so happy about it... And I ended up just feeling ill for the rest of that day. I hope I don't now. I really, really don't want to be that ill again...”
Jin doesn't answer, because - what can he answer exactly? Just tries to stand steadier, lean further back so that more of the turtle's weight is carried by him, and tightens his arms, bringing him closer still.
It's strange, Jin thinks, how their touches are all so impersonal, so asexual today. What with Kame massaging his temples in the morning, and then when they stumbled together after Jin's close call with death on top of that cliff; and when they huddled together against the wind behind that rock-outcropping and watched the approaching sunset, and well, right now, with Kame pressed against himself as closely as he couldn't even hope - and still there is no desire, as if it's washed away by the overwhelming concern.
Somehow, it's a first for Jin. He is no stranger to lust - has felt it many times and to many people, some of whom he has never seen for the second time after the feeling was assuaged. Caring, however... He doubts he's ever cared for anyone but his family and a few close friends, those that he has known for years. And now he thinks about it, it's sort of scary how much he's come to exactly care about Kame in just a few days...
***
“I think we can try to go inside now,” Kame says quietly. They have been standing here for more than half an hour, and the turtle hasn't shown any signs of nausea ever since they came out on the deck. “Maybe I can just sleep the rest of the storm off, if I'm lucky.” Well, his voice at least sounds like he is already halfway asleep.
They don't even make it to the stairs, before the turtle stops and shakes his head sadly in answer to Jin's inquiring gaze.
“You go down. I'll stay outside for a little longer, I guess...” And when Jin follows him anyway, “Go down, Jin, really. You're tired too. It's unfair for you to stay up with me, because I'm such a nuisance...”
“Like hell you are going there alone,” Jin protests immediately. He is tired, true, but nowhere near as much as the turtle. “You had difficulty standing upright even with me holding you. Do you want me to worry if you are washed into the sea or something when you are sleepy like that?”
“I'll sit,” Kame sighs, “there is bound to be some bench deep enough under the awning that it is not all wet. Now excuse me, I really need to go out there.”
Jin follows him nonetheless. He knows that Kame is beyond exhausted. He also sort of feels that Kame would in fact appreciate Jin's presence, rather than stay there cold and miserable, all alone on a stormy night. It's just that he thinks it's unfair towards Jin - in short it's the turtle's damn stubbornness showing up again. And Jin is absolutely not obliged to honor this trait of his - especially considering where it had landed Kame so far.
The benches are all wet. The one in the very corner perhaps a trifle less so, but only marginally, and Jin sits himself gingerly on the cold plastic, cringing as the water seeps immediately into the fabric of his pants.
“Come on,” he beckons to Kame, who is still inspecting the benches blearily. “You sit here,” he indicates his lap, “or nowhere at all.”
“Jin!” There is a wealth of indignation in that one word, Jin's sure, only - he doesn't really give a damn.
“What?” he queries in a matching tone. “I'm in jeans, you are in cotton sweat-pants. I'm healthy, and you are ill right now. I have parka, and you know it's warmer if we share it. Bottom-line - you are sitting here or we both stand. Your choice?”
“Are you leaving me one?” The retort sounds gruff, but there is... yeah, there it is, a little smile on the turtle's lips, shy and grateful at once.
He sits down on Jin's thighs after that, lightly at first, still carrying most of his weight, but Jin is too tired to bear with such ceremonies, so he leans back into the corner, tugs Kame to almost lie on his chest, and pulls the parka as closely as he can around both of their bodies (the sides do not meet as good as they did while they were standing, but it is better than nothing).
The turtle squirms a little indignantly, but eventually his arm sneaks around Jin, to hold firmly onto his back, and the head lowers tiredly into the crook between Jin's shoulder and neck.
“That's right,” Jin can't help acknowledging, “and now sleep already.”
“And you?”
“I'm alright, I'm not sleepy...”
They sit quietly for awhile, and then, when Kame's body is starting to grow heavier in Jin's lap, relaxing into the approaching sleep, he whispers softly, the words just a tiny gust of wind against Jin's sensitive collarbones, “Jin?.. Thanks.”
“Are you an idiot?” Jin huffs, suddenly embarrassed, into the slightly damp locks tickling his chin. “It's nothing. You'd do just the same for me... correction, you've done just the same for me!”
“I know...” comes the soft answer, “but thanks anyway.”
And then the turtle's head grows heavier yet, buries itself further into Jin's shoulder, and after awhile Jin's pretty sure that he is asleep.
When Jin wakes an hour and a half later, the storm has somewhat abated, or else the ship has turned in its route. At least it goes up and down, up and baaack down now without any considerable sideways listing. The water spray doesn't fly as high either, but instead it is raining heavily outside - beyond the awning that they are hiding under, and every so often, as the ship's nose rises higher onto the wave there is a heavy slosh of rainwater pouring down from the upper deck not two meters from where they are.
His feet are cold and numb, and his head is heavy, but the rest of him is wonderfully warm and comfy where there is a welcome weight breathing regularly somewhere into his neck.
Day 5 - Day at sea
When Jin wakes again, sufficient time later that he feels almost well-rested, he is greeted by bright sunlight filtering through the window of his cabin, and for a moment last night seems to him nothing but a bad dream.
He knows better soon enough, when he tries to pull the fingers through his sleep-ruffled hair and finds them coarse and stiff - a result of salt-water spray drying on them over the night. And if there is salt in his hair it means that the storm was real too, and that means that...
Jin turns around with a jolt, and there he is, indeed - the turtle, curled on his side and completely wrapped from the waist down in Jin's comforter that he has somehow hogged all for himself. Well, that at least accounts for why Jin is feeling all shivery. Then again, maybe not...
It is a rare chance and Jin scoots closer, lifts himself on his elbow to have a better view of the unsuspecting object of his inspection. Kame looks cute. Looks healthy too, thank God. Sure, there are the telltale eye-bags under his long lashes, bespeaking a rough and troublesome night, but his skin is no longer pale and he smiles to something in his sleep, his slightly parted lips a little chapped, but still as rosy as some girl's.
The turtle looks cute and it makes something tighten inside Jin, though not exactly in the chest area, as it did yesterday... well, there too, but mostly a lot lower than that. Makes sense, doesn't it? There is no more reason for concern, so, well, it doesn't wash away...eh... other things?
Kame's hair has fallen prey to the salt-water as well, and for a moment Jin plays with the notion of selling the idea to someone in the hair-product industry: 'Sea water - the most natural and (he can bet) hair-friendly fixing spray'. With the present craze about ecology it would sell like hotcakes.
Abstract musings can't distract him for long, because there is that single strand that has fallen right into Kame's face when he moved, and now the turtle is frowning slightly every time that it brushes the tip of his nose in time with his breathing.
It mesmerizes Jin, hypnotizes him completely - until he somehow doesn't even notice how his hand sneaks forward to remove the offending lock, carefully, with one finger... but it's stiff with the salt and won't stay behind the turtle's ear however Jin tries.
He's so concentrated on this task that it doesn't register at first that Kame's eyes are... hazelnut, really? He never noticed it before... and open, even if they squint on Jin with a bit of sleepy confusion.
“How?” The turtle asks finally. “How come I'm... here? I don't remember going down at all...”
“I brought you down after a couple of hours,” Jin explains simply, “The storm was lessening, and you were sleeping soundly, so I figured you wouldn't get seasick again. But I didn't want to leave you alone in your cabin just in case.”
“Thanks for taking care of me,” Kame says politely, lifts his hand to push the irritating strand firmly behind the ear, where it belongs and where Jin had been trying to position it so gently and carefully earlier. And, eh, speaking of Jin's hand which is still there, hovering forgotten millimeters from the turtle's ear. It is trapped now under the smaller palm, pressed where he can feel Kame's pulse beating steadily - sending something akin to electric jolts into the tips of Jin's fingers.
He tries to move one of them experimentally, just a little - short soft strokes over the tender vein underneath the skin, and Kame's lips part some more, his breath quickening along with his pulse that Jin is so intimately aware of.
A rosy tongue darts out to lick over the dry lips, a nervous habit that Jin already knows by heart, but this time the turtle's face wrinkles in abject disgust.
“Ugh, I stink! I should wash my teeth at least. Better yet take a showe... Ah...” Jin's thumb brushing over his lips makes him drop the complaint and finish the sentence with a deep shuddering breath. A soft flush spreads up from the neck of his t-shirt over that long, long graceful neck, where the adam's apple moves sharply up and down. “I... should?” He tries again, but without the surety he had earlier.
Jin has a big problem. A big and rather obvious problem down there. More obvious, because all the blankets are wrapped in a protective cocoon around Kame, concealing whatever problem the turtle might sport as well, while Jin is left completely on display, clad in nothing but his boxer shorts, and he wonders whether the turtle has already noticed how dire the... uh, situation?.. is for Jin.
He is still a little afraid to rush it, to act on what his body dictates most urgently. The turtle seems to be responding favorably for now, but Jin doesn't want to prompt another repeat of what happened in Naples, doesn't want to remind him of anything, so he keeps the touches light, tentative, unassuming, even though it demands a lot more control than he’s displayed in a long, long time.
He tries to move his hand lower, down the neck, over the defined collarbones, down into the opening of the turtle's t-shirt... And nobody stops him! In fact, Kame's breathing shudders under Jin's palm, his eyes growing darker, as his pupils dilate with growing awareness of Jin's touches, and his own hand slides over Jin's arm, brushes along the underside of his elbow, up, up, to clutch on Jin's bicep, when the latter goes deep enough to find one tiny, already hard nipple and circles it with his finger.
Ah! It is probably alright now... Is it alright? Jin moves closer, never let’s go of the turtle's gaze, just in case, just so that Kame knows how serious, how... shit, Jin doesn't know what he is even thinking any more. Only that his lips find at first the slightly salty temple, the flushed cheekbone, moving gradually, gradually down towards that slightly opened mouth...
And then Kame whirls out from under his hands, out from under his already descending lips. A moment and he is just - not there. Sits on the edge of the bed, stutters some nonsense about “really, really n-needing to brush his t-teeth,” looks frantically for his sweat-pants that Jin has removed because the very bottom of their legs was soaked through to the point of dripping...
Jin wants to roar. Jin wants to curse and rant and throw something heavy and... But he doesn't. Is probably too shell-shocked with how something that started so good turned into an utter disaster. Just watches how the turtle... (Kamenashi... Kamenashi, probably from now on, because Jin has fucked up royally, as both a wannabe lover and a friend… Should have chosen one or the other and stuck to his decision...) ...watches as Kamenashi pulls on his pants, his boots, catches his cardigan that would need some thorough dry cleaning before it could be worn again, and is gone.
Is gone.
And Jin can curl on his side, can roll and kick and groan... because fuck... because just - fuck! And it isn't even that he is aroused almost to the point of explosion, and it means the bathroom again and miserable jerking off under the lukewarm water. It just hurts; hurts in so many ways from his crotch all the way up to his brain. He wonders whether it will be alright, understandable - if he cries now? Because he feels like someone died, maybe himself. Maybe this is the reason why - though he is already jerking off unconsciously (fuck the bathroom) - he isn't even able to make himself come. It is only pain, pain and no release...
***
In his state he doesn't notice the knocking at once. Who could be knocking anyway? Who would need him so urgently now of all times? But the knocking persists, and so he trudges listlessly to the door, picks up a robe from the bathroom on his way to cover his nudity - though truly he could've opened the door in his shorts just as well, for all he cares...
And there is Kame in front of him. Barefooted and in a similar cruise-issue robe, his hair dripping water all over his shoulders as if he hasn't even taken time to dry it properly.
Kame. Barefooted. In nothing but a bathrobe. In the corridor.
He looks serious, almost grim, a little impatient...
“Aren't you going to let me enter?”
Kame. In a bathrobe. Before Jin's door. In the corridor...
Jin takes a step back. Kame takes a step forward. And then the door goes “click” behind him and they are both inside Jin's cabin now.
Kame. In a bathrobe. With his hair dripping wet... And Jin's lost. Jin doesn't know what to think anymore.
“It's not,” he mumbles, “not because you feel grateful, or something? For yesterday? Or...”
'Or because you took pity on me', but it is too pathetic even for Jin to say it out loud, and also maybe, maybe he assumes again, and it is something else altogether, like, maybe Kame just wants to borrow his hairdryer?
“Idiot,” Kame says.
And Jin thinks that it is some new Kame. Not completely new, because he really knows already that the turtle can be as decisive and assertive as that, he's just... sort of never expected to see this side of him within this particular context.
“Bakanishi indeed,” and it sounds almost like an endearment. Jin can totally be called this way always so long as it is pronounced with such tender exasperation. “I told you that I just needed to brush my teeth, didn’t I?” Kame takes a step forward and Jin takes a step back, it's purely instinctual. Only there isn't much way to step back, because, well, 'hello, bed!'
“I can't fathom how it is that it doesn't even enter that 'baka' head of yours, that I may want you,” and one stubby forefinger jabs rather painfully into Jin's chest, “just as much as you want me.”
Jin can only gulp, because if the “cute Kame” was already a sensual overload, this “dominant” one is just beyond hot, and Jin's skin burns where the turtle's finger traces some indecipherable kanji over his ribs.
Only as his eyes trace the outline of Kame's face, lingering on wet strands falling onto his forehead, glinting and darker than usual, he remembers...
“It's... I guess I need to brush my teeth now as well, and well, take a shower...”
But Kame dismisses the idea without even a thought.
“Later.”
“But...”
“I was sick, for god's sake! That's why I just couldn't let you kiss me like that! But believe me, right now I don't give a shit if your breath is a little stale. Besides, I like how you smell!”
And this last phrase is just... is all the push that Jin needs, and he steps forward, and so does Kame...
And Kame's mouth tastes like strawberries and mint and hungry almost desperate passion.
They fall to the bed somehow, without breaking the kiss, and it doesn't matter who was initially on top, because they sort of roll, frantically discarding the robes - a tangle of limbs reaching everywhere at once - tugging, clinging, hips bucking wildly for more friction. And it takes only a little help - just Jin's hand wrapped around both their erections at once, just Kame's finger circling around their respective heads and brushing the slits - for both of them to come, painfully and violently, Jin with a high-pitched whimper and Kame with something akin to a low roar.
***
They breathe. Lay there, where the tidal-wave of passion has left them as two fishes on the shore, and just breathe (also like those fishes, what a fitting comparison).
“Wow, that was intense,” Kame exhales finally, and Jin knows that he has to answer something, maybe do something, but he is just too spent. So he just turns his head and watches the sharp profile - Kame's face more relaxed and unguarded now than he has ever seen it before.
And then Kame turns his head as well, watches Jin in return, smiles that little secret smile that is in the eyes more than it actually stretches his mouth. Looks happy. Jin has made him happy, and Jin feels warm at the thought. Feels strong and all-powerful.
Strong enough to rouse himself finally and go to the bathroom and clean the damn teeth. And take a shower. Both of them need a shower now, in fact.
“Join me in the bathroom?” He asks as he sits up and scrambles to the foot of the bed. “Or do you want me to bring a wet towel and clean you up here?” His finger traces over the line of the turtles's hipbone; smudges the white splashes around the navel.
“Uhm...the latter, I think,” Kame stretches lazily, unconsciously sensual like a cat, and Jin can't help but to bend down and place a feather-light kiss to where his abdomen dips just so under the ribs; to lay his cheek there momentarily, and feel the involuntary upward jerk of the turtle's hips in response to his caress... and hear the angry growl of his stomach under Jin's ear.
Jin chuckles at the incongruity of reactions and straightens up, placing a warm palm where his cheek just lay - to sooth a hungry tiger within.
“We need to order something from room-service after that. You need to eat.” Him too, probably - he hasn't had anything since those sandwiches yesterday, he just somehow hasn't thought about it, but now he does - he's starving.
Kame has similar thoughts, perhaps, because he chuckles too, the warm chocolaty sound that Jin remembers ever since their first proper meeting in Rome. The one he promised to write a song about (and maybe he can now).
“Don't you need it as well?”
“Ah,” Jin drawls teasingly, “it's different, you see. I want to eat, but you need to. You are way too thin.”
“That's what everybody says.” The answer sounds light, but Kame turns a little, curls a little, places his hand above Jin's to keep it in place, as if it soothes some very real ache, or maybe - some insecurity inside. “But once I put on weight, they all just think I'm fat.”
Jin bends again, places another kiss on the ribs, right over where both their hands lay.
“I won't.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.” He tugs his hand out gently.
It's deep waters. They don't need to go there, not when they were so comfortable just a moment ago. And this time Kame sits up as well, pulls Jin close, into a sloppy short kiss that is half gratitude for the understanding and half lighthearted teasing.
“Go already. Or I will be tempted to join you after all.”
***
He goes, and washes, and dries his hair, just because he doesn't like it when it's wet, and then brings the hairdrier out to dry what's still wet of Kame's, just because he likes to pull his fingers through it. Likes how it is at once both straight and fluffy.
Jin is the one responsible for the food-ordering, and Kame retires to the bathroom for the time when the room-service actually arrives - partly for proprietary reasons and partly, because he is unsatisfied with Jin's wet-cloth-washing quality, which turned out into more of a sensual caress than actual cleaning, and they had to put a stop to it or else they would've never gotten to ordering the food.
They end up eating too much too fast - both have been starving, really. So their meal probably looks like something from a documentary movie about primitive tribes, as they sit on the bed in unfastened robes and just glomp whatever there is without even speaking - and it leaves them heavy and sleepy. In the end they decide to act on it and just cuddle together, relegating their half-back-there arousals to sometime later, when they are supposedly able to move again.
Kame actually sleeps after a while, not peculiarly curled for once, but sprawled lazily against Jin's side, nose buried somewhere in Jin's armpit. Which makes Jin smile - makes him remember just how assertive the turtle sounded when he claimed to “like Jin's smell”. Looks like the claim was true.
Jin wants to sleep too, but cannot, because finally, finally he feels the music returning into his head - a soft, wistful ballad-like song that just needs to be written. After some time he sighs in defeat, disentangles himself from Kame's overthrown arm cautiously and sits in the armchair, taking out the guitar and putting some paper and pen in ready access to jot down the chords.
He can't really play the guitar, not if he doesn't want to wake Kame, but it helps anyway - to be able to press the chords, to listen with his fingertips more than ears to almost inaudible vibrations of the sound as he touches the strings.
The song is all music for now, but he is sure that the words will come later, by the time that Jin polishes the melody into its final form. But even now, imperfect and wordless, it already sounds good - quite possibly the best ballad that he's ever written.
When he finishes with the chords, he plays right through it again, this time actually plays it even if it is as soft as possible, humming where the words are supposed to be, and then puts the guitar down by the chair quietly. Yeah... and now perhaps he can sleep.
“Does it have a name?”
The question startles Jin. He hadn't even noticed that Kame was awake. But, well, the turtle hasn't moved either. Just opened his eyes, and there is a kind of restrained wistfulness in them, something quite in tune with Jin's song.
“Not yet,” Jin answers truthfully, “Do you have any ideas?”
“Well, it sort of depends on what the words will be about...”
“Yeah...” Jin agrees. “There is that.”
Kame pulls Jin close, once he climbs back in bed, scrambles a little higher to be on a level with him.
“I liked it... the song...”
Jin nods, combs his fingers through Kame's hair, ruffled from sleep, idly thinks that he perhaps likes him like this, with an open forehead...
“Sleep some more?”
“Don't know...” But he lays his head alongside Jin's anyway, and Jin just can't help petting his hair a little more, it's soothing somehow...
Well, not to Kame perhaps, because he huffs indignantly and raises his hand to tug none-too-gently on Jin's own strands.
“Stop it already! Am I a cat for you? Would you want me to do that to you?”
Before he can continue with his rant, Jin lowers his head and rubs it on Kame's shoulder, exactly the way that cats do, when they ask for petting, looking upward beseechingly and even purrs a bit...
“Hm...yes please?”
He is rewarded with the spectacle of an indignant expression melting into mild incredulity and then into unbound mirth, when Kame laughs out loudly and freely...
And Jin... lays his head onto the turtle's shoulder and lets him pet it - a lot gentler now and with undeniable affection... feels something tighten in his chest almost unbearably, and tries not to think about how tomorrow they will be on Mallorca, and then there is Barcelona, where Jin comes ashore, and Nice, where Kame does... tries not to speak, because if he does now, he would undeniably sprout something entirely sappy, something along the lines of 'Come to England with me'.
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