rant
I'm feeling really lost lately, like there's someone I'm ment to be but I'm not, and I can't figure out how to be that person. I can barely paint lately and when I do it's not the quality that I know I can. I'm pushing 30 with out ever having had a serious job. I want my life to have some sort of meaning and I only have a vague idea what that meaning is. I can barely talk to people, even close friends and have lost contact with so many people who used to be in my life I've dug my self into some sort of life hole that I can't even find the motivation to crawl back out of. I think I'm actually failing at life pretty fucking badly right now