crossposted from Lee Edward McIlmoyle's blog
I posted this on Facebook a few moments ago:
I think I just figured out why my books aren’t selling, even when I do some promotions work; I’ve been writing for an intended audience that might not actually exist in the numbers I previously believed were out there somewhere. I’ve been writing for a future that isn’t coming. A sensibility that is dying. A people that are being hushed into extinction. In short, I’m fighting a losing battle. I’d ask why folks hadn’t told me this before, but I suspect the answer is, they told me so long ago, I just refused to believe them. I thought Pump Up The Volume was a vanguard, a rallying cry for my generation. Turns out it was an outlier. A dead end. A eulogy.
So, what should I do now? I have no interest in watching the human race circling down the drain. I still think we should talk and sort out our problems. But the human race as an entity seems to be regressing to simian behaviour. I ask you, is it fair that empty headed money men are going to destroy the ecosystem and take us all down with them, when there are at least a handful of us who have been screaming our heads off to stop all along? Are we really this stupid as a species? Was all of that great art, music and literature a ruse? Did we learn nothing? Why can’t I get that into my head?
See, the problem for me is, I was born in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada in the winter of 1970. It wasn’t an idyllic time, but I rather innocently believed all of the half-baked crap that Pierre Trudeau’s government taught us about multiculturalism and social democracy and treating one another fairly and sensitively. I was a perfect little soldier for the Canadian Kindness Revolution. But there were quite a few of us, before, during, and since, who didn’t buy it for one minute. See, they knew something I refused to accept: people are basically no good. Human Beings are nasty and hateful and spiteful and simple and miserable. We have done so little to make this planet survivable, and we have conjured up every pathetic excuse we could to justify killing one another with bullets and bats and bombs and bills and bullshit. Humans are inherently wrong for this beautiful planet, and the best thing we could do is pack up and leave, so the rest of the planet can resume its beautiful existence.
In a nihilistic society like ours, is it any wonder I’ve been completely financially unsuccessful? Is it any wonder I’ve utterly failed to tap into the zeitgeist? I’m completely at odds with the society I grew up in. I’m hopeless.
But hey, let’s put another record on and try to forget that we’re killing ourselves and everyone around us.
Lee.
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