geee someone slap me
ok well lets see
im depressed. its official. i hate my life. i love my friends. i love my family. but i fucking hate my life. i have feelings for a friend who is still in love with his ex and even if he wasn't he wouldnt have feelings for me (so basically i care about someone i can never be with go fucking figure isnt that what happens to me like all the fucking time) but i never tell him my feelings until i get drunk then i feel like a jackass the next fucking day cuz he just fucking ignores me spilling out my guts and shit and dont fucking talk to me. if he was a good friend he would be like cristy thats awesome that you feel that for me but i dont feel the same and it would make life a little easier on me but NOOOO instead im just going to ignore her until i happen to be at the same place at the same time with her and then im going to be like oh its ok no big deal. whatever fucker i need closure and you not fucking talking to me about how you feel bout me fuckin spilling my guts about my feelings for you fuckin hurts worse than if you said i dont fuckin like you cristy so get the fuck over it. SHIT!!! all i can say is inconsiderate bastard. now im being mean. whoo hoo fun.
well other thing thats bothering me is im here visiting my best friend and my god daughter and they live with her parents. this household is filled with alot of the bad things i grew up in and i cant take it much longer. the verbal abuse. the so called jokes that even if said jokingly doesnt make it not verbal abuse. the whole you cant do this or this or this and having to walk on eggshells... its driving me nuts and i wish i could get her out of this situation cuz i know its driving me nuts and i dont fucking live here... but she wont fucking some with me so i guess i cant do anything else except be here for her when she needs to vent....
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh
i hate my life. someone just shoot me.
on a good note i guess ( its hard to see it as good while im surrounded by all bad) a friend of mine who i hardly ever get to see but throughly enjoy when i do get to see him .... asked me this morning at like 3am if i wanted totry to date.. and i think it will rock.. but i dont know how much of myself i can put into it until i get closure from the fuckin asshole mentioned above.
whooo hooo what a fucking day to be me!!!!
i always did have to start the new year off right huh
peace and love
cristy leblanc :)
im depressed. its official. i hate my life. i love my friends. i love my family. but i fucking hate my life. i have feelings for a friend who is still in love with his ex and even if he wasn't he wouldnt have feelings for me (so basically i care about someone i can never be with go fucking figure isnt that what happens to me like all the fucking time) but i never tell him my feelings until i get drunk then i feel like a jackass the next fucking day cuz he just fucking ignores me spilling out my guts and shit and dont fucking talk to me. if he was a good friend he would be like cristy thats awesome that you feel that for me but i dont feel the same and it would make life a little easier on me but NOOOO instead im just going to ignore her until i happen to be at the same place at the same time with her and then im going to be like oh its ok no big deal. whatever fucker i need closure and you not fucking talking to me about how you feel bout me fuckin spilling my guts about my feelings for you fuckin hurts worse than if you said i dont fuckin like you cristy so get the fuck over it. SHIT!!! all i can say is inconsiderate bastard. now im being mean. whoo hoo fun.
well other thing thats bothering me is im here visiting my best friend and my god daughter and they live with her parents. this household is filled with alot of the bad things i grew up in and i cant take it much longer. the verbal abuse. the so called jokes that even if said jokingly doesnt make it not verbal abuse. the whole you cant do this or this or this and having to walk on eggshells... its driving me nuts and i wish i could get her out of this situation cuz i know its driving me nuts and i dont fucking live here... but she wont fucking some with me so i guess i cant do anything else except be here for her when she needs to vent....
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh
i hate my life. someone just shoot me.
on a good note i guess ( its hard to see it as good while im surrounded by all bad) a friend of mine who i hardly ever get to see but throughly enjoy when i do get to see him .... asked me this morning at like 3am if i wanted totry to date.. and i think it will rock.. but i dont know how much of myself i can put into it until i get closure from the fuckin asshole mentioned above.
whooo hooo what a fucking day to be me!!!!
i always did have to start the new year off right huh
peace and love
cristy leblanc :)