If you never read any other entry, i suggest you read this one.
Today was grim reaper day.
i can't even begin to describe my frusteration caused by my fellow peers.
almost all of my encounters today made me see just how rude and ignorant people can be.
no one seemed to get the message because everyone was too busy making fun of the so-called "freaks" that partake in this day.
so i'm going to explain to you all why i did grim reaper day, and i hope that you take this seriously, because this is real life and this is not just another statistic.
Her names was Dina Goldstone.
She died early morning on July 5th, 2005 just a small distance away from my camp, French Woods.
She was 19.
Dina had gone to french woods as a camper for many years, and this was her second year as a counsler.
she was one of those extraordinary people that you rarely meet in life.
an amazing student, with an incredible gift for singing, dancing, acting, and playing sports.
more than that, she was one of the kindest people you could ever meet, and when i needed to talk to her, she was there for me.
The morning of July 5th we slept in late, and later that night we were supposed to go see a movie.
after brunch, we went back to our bunks and layed around.
i was doing something stupid like painting my toes, and when Carolyn our head counsler came in to tell us we had to report to the Pavillion immediately, i remember getting aggravated, and thinking they were going to yell at the campers for drinking on the 4th of July.
we were walking towards the pavillion, and we see a bunk of girls hysterically crying.
i started getting a little worried.
i went up to a girl i had met once before and i asked her what had happened.
she was crying so much she couldn't tell me, so i shook her a little and i said "What happened?!"
she said "Dina died."
it couldn't have been the Dina I knew. It had to be some other counsler named Dina. Some counsler i had never met.
as we walked to the pavillion i started to cry, and by the time we sat down, i was balling.
no one around me knew yet, and they thought i was crying because i didn't know what was going on.
i remember Ron, the hardened, scary, mean owner of our camp sitting down on the pavillion stage.
he talked for a while.
there was an accident.
two counslers had died, and one was in critical condition.
The first name was Chris.
i thought, oh god please don't let it be her name next.
and Dina Goldstone.
i swear, i have never heard as much screaming and sobbing as in that one moment.
everyone knew her.
everyone loved her.
Dina's younger sister Jamie has been one of my best friends since i was eight.
i went to the camp office and went online and she was on.
i talked to her, and i told her i wanted to go to the funeral and that i wanted to be with her and that i was so sorry to hear about Dina.
The camp wasn't going to let any campers attend the funeral because too many kids wanted to go and they would be taking too much of a risk, right after a car accident.
Dina's mom called Ron and told him that she wanted me there.
so they made an exception only for me.
The morning of the funeral i woke up early.
i had to scramble to find something appropriate to wear.
most kids going off to sleep away camp don't pack an outfit to wear to a funeral.
its not on the suggested packing list or anything.
i was the only camper sitting in a van of counslers.
Ron was driving, and i remember being very nervous by that, because he is a very frightening man.
On the way there, i slept a little, and listened to the song Two Zero Two by Northstar.
When we got to the temple, i found it really sad, because the last time i was at that temple, was to celebrate Jamie's bat mitzvah, and its sad to go from celebrating such a wonderful thing to mourning for the loss of a wonderful person.
Jamie was stoic.
she had no expression on her face the whole funeral.
Jamie and Dina's older sister Frankie cried a little.
Then their mother, Jill, got up to speak.
she said a lot of really nice things and told some funny stories about Dina. I think they captured her very well.
When her father got up to speak, it was quite different.
he said that Chris, the driver of the car was going 80 mph when they crashed into a large tree, on a road with no lights and many sharp turns.
he also said THAT CHRIS'S BLOOD ALCOHOL LEVEL WAD .18 WHEN THEY FOUND THEM.
he said "Dina, we will never know what made you get into that car that night."
i cried a little but i didn't want to cry infront of Ron because he hadn't wanted me to come in the first place because he didnt think i could handle it.
This next scene has been burned into my memory forever:
When we got to the graveyard, there was the casket laying just above the ground.
as we said the kadish, the casket started to be lowered into the ground.
i will never forget as long as i live, the image of Jill Goldstone, Dina's mother, as they lowered Dina.
she was screaming and grabbing, reaching for the casket, her daughters and her husband had to grab her back as she desperately tried to stop them from burying her child.
you should never have to bury your own child.
then came the point where the people at the funeral shovel a bit of dirt and throw it over the casket.
i could barely bring myself to do it, and Hallie, my good friend, had to help me.
the sound of the dirt hitting the casket, sounded like she was hitting from the inside, trying to get out.
it made me cry.
as Dina's family got into their limo, we hugged them, and Jill started crying really hard when she saw me, and i dont know why. i consoled her as best i could, but its so hard to know what to do in those situations.
on the way back to the van, Ron put his arm around me and said "you know, at first i didn't want you to come today, but now, i'm really glad that you came."
on the way home, we passed the scene of the accident.
the railing was completely broken off, and that tree, that huge tree, was completely knocked over.
when we got back to camp, i tried to go to the end of evening activity.
i sat there, but i only got more and more upset.
i went outside the pavillion and jeremy was there.
he hugged me and i started crying, much more than i had before.
then my ex boyfriend stephen came up to me and hugged me.
i broke down.
i started punching his stomach and screaming, saying
"HE MURDERED HER! HE MURDERED HER!" and i started breathing really hard, and screaming and crying.
and he grabbed me and he just held me really tight until i quieted down a little, still crying he walked me back to the main area of camp.
that's where i saw her luggage, packed up, waiting to be taken home.
it was extremely disturbing.
a few days after the funeral, Dina's family came up to camp and we held a memorial service in her and chris's name.
people sang songs, read poems, and gave messages to the families.
Caberet troupe sang. we sang Bridge Over Troubled Water.
we couldn't sing very well, and i remember seeing her mother cry when we sang
"sail on silver girl,
sail on by.
your time has come to shine.
all your dreams are on their way."
things like this happen.
tragedies happen.
i tell Dina's story, because i don't think i could handle another one of these tragedies happening to another friend, and i say most sincerely,
NEVER DRINK AND DRIVE, AND NEVER GET INTO A CAR WITH SOMEONE WHO IS DRINKING AND DRIVING.
please.
Dina i love you so much, and i hope that there is a heaven and that you are happy there.
♥
i can't even begin to describe my frusteration caused by my fellow peers.
almost all of my encounters today made me see just how rude and ignorant people can be.
no one seemed to get the message because everyone was too busy making fun of the so-called "freaks" that partake in this day.
so i'm going to explain to you all why i did grim reaper day, and i hope that you take this seriously, because this is real life and this is not just another statistic.
Her names was Dina Goldstone.
She died early morning on July 5th, 2005 just a small distance away from my camp, French Woods.
She was 19.
Dina had gone to french woods as a camper for many years, and this was her second year as a counsler.
she was one of those extraordinary people that you rarely meet in life.
an amazing student, with an incredible gift for singing, dancing, acting, and playing sports.
more than that, she was one of the kindest people you could ever meet, and when i needed to talk to her, she was there for me.
The morning of July 5th we slept in late, and later that night we were supposed to go see a movie.
after brunch, we went back to our bunks and layed around.
i was doing something stupid like painting my toes, and when Carolyn our head counsler came in to tell us we had to report to the Pavillion immediately, i remember getting aggravated, and thinking they were going to yell at the campers for drinking on the 4th of July.
we were walking towards the pavillion, and we see a bunk of girls hysterically crying.
i started getting a little worried.
i went up to a girl i had met once before and i asked her what had happened.
she was crying so much she couldn't tell me, so i shook her a little and i said "What happened?!"
she said "Dina died."
it couldn't have been the Dina I knew. It had to be some other counsler named Dina. Some counsler i had never met.
as we walked to the pavillion i started to cry, and by the time we sat down, i was balling.
no one around me knew yet, and they thought i was crying because i didn't know what was going on.
i remember Ron, the hardened, scary, mean owner of our camp sitting down on the pavillion stage.
he talked for a while.
there was an accident.
two counslers had died, and one was in critical condition.
The first name was Chris.
i thought, oh god please don't let it be her name next.
and Dina Goldstone.
i swear, i have never heard as much screaming and sobbing as in that one moment.
everyone knew her.
everyone loved her.
Dina's younger sister Jamie has been one of my best friends since i was eight.
i went to the camp office and went online and she was on.
i talked to her, and i told her i wanted to go to the funeral and that i wanted to be with her and that i was so sorry to hear about Dina.
The camp wasn't going to let any campers attend the funeral because too many kids wanted to go and they would be taking too much of a risk, right after a car accident.
Dina's mom called Ron and told him that she wanted me there.
so they made an exception only for me.
The morning of the funeral i woke up early.
i had to scramble to find something appropriate to wear.
most kids going off to sleep away camp don't pack an outfit to wear to a funeral.
its not on the suggested packing list or anything.
i was the only camper sitting in a van of counslers.
Ron was driving, and i remember being very nervous by that, because he is a very frightening man.
On the way there, i slept a little, and listened to the song Two Zero Two by Northstar.
When we got to the temple, i found it really sad, because the last time i was at that temple, was to celebrate Jamie's bat mitzvah, and its sad to go from celebrating such a wonderful thing to mourning for the loss of a wonderful person.
Jamie was stoic.
she had no expression on her face the whole funeral.
Jamie and Dina's older sister Frankie cried a little.
Then their mother, Jill, got up to speak.
she said a lot of really nice things and told some funny stories about Dina. I think they captured her very well.
When her father got up to speak, it was quite different.
he said that Chris, the driver of the car was going 80 mph when they crashed into a large tree, on a road with no lights and many sharp turns.
he also said THAT CHRIS'S BLOOD ALCOHOL LEVEL WAD .18 WHEN THEY FOUND THEM.
he said "Dina, we will never know what made you get into that car that night."
i cried a little but i didn't want to cry infront of Ron because he hadn't wanted me to come in the first place because he didnt think i could handle it.
This next scene has been burned into my memory forever:
When we got to the graveyard, there was the casket laying just above the ground.
as we said the kadish, the casket started to be lowered into the ground.
i will never forget as long as i live, the image of Jill Goldstone, Dina's mother, as they lowered Dina.
she was screaming and grabbing, reaching for the casket, her daughters and her husband had to grab her back as she desperately tried to stop them from burying her child.
you should never have to bury your own child.
then came the point where the people at the funeral shovel a bit of dirt and throw it over the casket.
i could barely bring myself to do it, and Hallie, my good friend, had to help me.
the sound of the dirt hitting the casket, sounded like she was hitting from the inside, trying to get out.
it made me cry.
as Dina's family got into their limo, we hugged them, and Jill started crying really hard when she saw me, and i dont know why. i consoled her as best i could, but its so hard to know what to do in those situations.
on the way back to the van, Ron put his arm around me and said "you know, at first i didn't want you to come today, but now, i'm really glad that you came."
on the way home, we passed the scene of the accident.
the railing was completely broken off, and that tree, that huge tree, was completely knocked over.
when we got back to camp, i tried to go to the end of evening activity.
i sat there, but i only got more and more upset.
i went outside the pavillion and jeremy was there.
he hugged me and i started crying, much more than i had before.
then my ex boyfriend stephen came up to me and hugged me.
i broke down.
i started punching his stomach and screaming, saying
"HE MURDERED HER! HE MURDERED HER!" and i started breathing really hard, and screaming and crying.
and he grabbed me and he just held me really tight until i quieted down a little, still crying he walked me back to the main area of camp.
that's where i saw her luggage, packed up, waiting to be taken home.
it was extremely disturbing.
a few days after the funeral, Dina's family came up to camp and we held a memorial service in her and chris's name.
people sang songs, read poems, and gave messages to the families.
Caberet troupe sang. we sang Bridge Over Troubled Water.
we couldn't sing very well, and i remember seeing her mother cry when we sang
"sail on silver girl,
sail on by.
your time has come to shine.
all your dreams are on their way."
things like this happen.
tragedies happen.
i tell Dina's story, because i don't think i could handle another one of these tragedies happening to another friend, and i say most sincerely,
NEVER DRINK AND DRIVE, AND NEVER GET INTO A CAR WITH SOMEONE WHO IS DRINKING AND DRIVING.
please.
Dina i love you so much, and i hope that there is a heaven and that you are happy there.
♥