(no subject)
I'm being really bad today. I slept late and missed my first bus....I could have rushed and made the next bus but my sweetie told me to take a day off and phone in sick. Okay, that might not sound like a big deal but it is for me. I am one of those people who's limbs have to be hanging off before I will consider even half a day off!! I worry so much even if I am really ill that I'm doing something wrong! I work in an office with 3 people and between them they have had numerous days off...and usually because of hangovers! Yet I still worry. My wife rightly points out that I work my ass off, regularly (at least 3 times a week) I am in the office early and working. I handle all the work completely on my own (several times without notice) when the other two women are off work and I rarely even use my 'proper' days off. So, is it a bad thing to take one day off and not really be ill??? I know that it's silly but I still worry and I have always been like that, even if the job is crappy, part-time, whether there are over 100 staff, or just 2 people...I automatically feel guilty when I'm off. I think it's a combination of my in-built guilt system and my dillusion that things won't work without me there!! Rationally, I know that the office existed before me and will after I go but I still ahve irrational thoughts that no one can do my job as well as me. Maybe it's actually true but I know that the place won't actually fall apart without me. Maybe that's the problem, I don't want to know that it can run without me because I would feel invalidated.......blah blah blah listen to me whine...
This is the most ridiculous post ever, I can't believe I'm committing this to print...of all the things in the world to be obsessing over. I'm going to shut up now after getting all that shite out of my system. I'm going to go and start dinner for the wife...it's nice to be at home before her for a change as she is home before me by about an hour normally.
Will be back tomorrow to let the world (well the several peeps that actually peruse my lj) know if the office has imploded while I had a day off! :) I doubt that it has!
Random side-note...while still in major crush mode (what age am I, 12??) regarding Natasha Kaplinsky, I'm adding two ladies to the list. I have always liked Mariska Hargitay (Olivia Benson on Law and Order SVU) but I'm liking her a lot more for some reason. I am also liking Marcia Cross (Bree Van De Kamp in Desperate Housewives) who is really stunning, particularly when she smiles, which her character doesn't do much in the series (so far) Here are some pics of them...one of which is them together at the Golden Globes where Mariska won for Best Actress in a Drama (I think)
There is also one of Mariska with her co-star in Law and Order, Stephanie March...there is a lot of fanfic about these two being together...here is a link to some of the ones I've read...the're quite good...http://www.ralst.com/storiesLO.html
This is the most ridiculous post ever, I can't believe I'm committing this to print...of all the things in the world to be obsessing over. I'm going to shut up now after getting all that shite out of my system. I'm going to go and start dinner for the wife...it's nice to be at home before her for a change as she is home before me by about an hour normally.
Will be back tomorrow to let the world (well the several peeps that actually peruse my lj) know if the office has imploded while I had a day off! :) I doubt that it has!
Random side-note...while still in major crush mode (what age am I, 12??) regarding Natasha Kaplinsky, I'm adding two ladies to the list. I have always liked Mariska Hargitay (Olivia Benson on Law and Order SVU) but I'm liking her a lot more for some reason. I am also liking Marcia Cross (Bree Van De Kamp in Desperate Housewives) who is really stunning, particularly when she smiles, which her character doesn't do much in the series (so far) Here are some pics of them...one of which is them together at the Golden Globes where Mariska won for Best Actress in a Drama (I think)
There is also one of Mariska with her co-star in Law and Order, Stephanie March...there is a lot of fanfic about these two being together...here is a link to some of the ones I've read...the're quite good...http://www.ralst.com/storiesLO.html