(no subject)
i have to hold on. right?
i cant even open up anymore. the people closest have gone long and far. funny, in my line of sight but nowhere near to me.
i cannot believe that after all this time....thats all it is is time. and once we wittle it down to that and decide that time is not love, nor reason to love, what are our reasons for loving? love...but not in love. we'll forever say it but what meaning will it have?
I am coming to conclusions and I cannot tell if they are absurd or honest. but behavior and the way it makes me feel, i know. the way it feels to be close for so long...the feel of it deteriorating...alone again. traded up for better friends.
I know i am not a good time. or pleasant to be around. so i stay in isolation and listen to interactions we will never have again.
and this is how we leave it.