Moments from the household

[le_russe_satan]

 After doing some fencing in the garden, while counting up injuries:

Me: "A cut on my leg, and I'm pretty sure the base of my thumb is swelling."
Husband, just returned from toilet: "you cut me in an intimate area!"
Me: "I win then?"

Later on, discussing next weekend:
Me: "I wanna see the new Iron man!"
Husband: "I haven't seen any of them."
Me, spluttering: "Why did I marry you?!"