Slipping
Im sorry to everyone but Im slipping again. I know i havent been great to talk to but Im trying, it's just very hard to help others right now. So if you feel ignored or hurt or angry that I havent been my usual self with everything please dont take it personally. It really isnt you and as cliche and ridiculous as this is, it really is me lol. It's all just built up, I need a little time before i can just pick up again. Who knows? Maybe this time I wont. I havent really decided at this point. Im not sure where or what or how this happened, it just seems to have escalated right now. I dont like me like this so if I leave unexpectedly or the dogs suddenly need walking or my room needs to be cleaned thats why. I refuse to talk to anyone when Im this way because really I think it's weak and i hate being weak and thats what i am right now. (So, lol, anyone who wanted to kick me when Im down, nows the perfect time :P) ...just kidding on that last part...really wouldnt be the best idea you've ever had. Honestly if any of you take this as suicidal I will never speak to you again, every last one of you should know im not that dumb. This is simply a vague detail-lacking explanation to my odd behavior, nothing more. It isnt a cry for help, it isnt a pity me speech, it's just what it is. So I guess what Im trying to say is I need patience, I need forgiveness, and for the love of anything that you've ever believed in, I need someone to know. Dont ask me questions, dont ask 'what can I do?' Dont ask if anything is wrong, dont tell me it's going to be ok, and dont you ever say you understand.