It's gonna take a lot.
Yesterday she walked into a restaurant and thought she saw me at her first glance of some other guy.
It’s just those sorts of things that give me my worst anxiety. A few sentences maybe and I’ll do everything in my power to dissect them to the point where there’s nothing more than a pile of bones and guts. Maybe she inflects words and I just can’t know because I haven’t actually spoken to her in months, or maybe she’s “one of those”. The other day I felt awful because I found myself jealous of a friend. It only lasted a few hours before I was able to recognize it as jealousy and come to terms with myself. I felt really bad afterward, though not for that person, but for myself and that I would ever be jealous of anything about anyone. Lately I’ve been having the most optimistic dreams. I feel like Tony in the West Side Story. Like I’m waking up reaching out for something, feeling its presence but not knowing what it is.
It’s just those sorts of things that give me my worst anxiety. A few sentences maybe and I’ll do everything in my power to dissect them to the point where there’s nothing more than a pile of bones and guts. Maybe she inflects words and I just can’t know because I haven’t actually spoken to her in months, or maybe she’s “one of those”. The other day I felt awful because I found myself jealous of a friend. It only lasted a few hours before I was able to recognize it as jealousy and come to terms with myself. I felt really bad afterward, though not for that person, but for myself and that I would ever be jealous of anything about anyone. Lately I’ve been having the most optimistic dreams. I feel like Tony in the West Side Story. Like I’m waking up reaching out for something, feeling its presence but not knowing what it is.