mums feelings
well more on whats going on in my life, this shall be divided into 3 sections
1.how my mum feels
2.how my dad feels.
3.and how i feel about me dad
I think it the right time for you to know just how I do feel.
I think that I never really did love you, not properly (this is not said to hurt you). You hear people say how they feel when they truly love someone. I never had that feeling. Looking at it all now, your leaving me should have hurt a lot more than it did. It was more the inconvience of having to reevaluate my life, sorting out my goals and what I want out of life. I think we just get ourselves in a rut and it suits to stay there because its safe. I must admit over the past few months I have been thinking, is this what I want my life to be like over the next 20 years. The answer was No but I had the kids to think of first and foremost and would never have done anything to upset them. I would have carried on through life wondering what if but at least the kids would have been happy. There were good times and bad. The good I am thankful for the bad I would like to forget.
Maybe you are right I probably do have a bit of an attitude now but given the circumstances and you in my position do you honestly think you would have been any different (Think hard on this one).
I thought I was a forgiving person but things that have been said and done over the past 2 years have made that not possible for me at the moment. I suppose in time it will happen but not right now. Promises that were made and broken have seen to that.
I’m sad at the way things have turned out as far as our relationship goes but that all comes under the forgiving thing but they say time is a great healer (I hope so). We will always have contact as far as the kids go.
I have never really told the kids how I feel because I didn’t want it to affect there relationship with you and believe me I do want them to have one with you. As you said you are still there father and I know that you do love them. I will never interfere with that but as I said to you and them it will be on their terms.
I was not trying to interfere in your life as far as you telling the kids things I was only trying to get you to see that preparing them for things instead of putting them on the spot was a better way. I have been a mother for 18 years and sometimes we get a feeling for these things more so than a father (that is not a dig at you). But that is your decision as you put it.
I really hope you find whatever it is that your looking for. Life is far too short.
This email is to help me move on and for you to have a better understanding of me. I am not a bad person and you are right I do deserve better. We just never really had anything in common (apart from the kids). Our priorities were different.
Do not respond to this email. I said I would send you my feelings. Now you will have a better understanding of where I am at.
As for the houses another option is for me to keep Lindsay St and you to have the other two. We could wait for the valuations to see whether it is an option. Means I don’t have to move and you could leave your tenants in the other houses
Just a thought.
Pam Cox ;-)
1.how my mum feels
2.how my dad feels.
3.and how i feel about me dad
I think it the right time for you to know just how I do feel.
I think that I never really did love you, not properly (this is not said to hurt you). You hear people say how they feel when they truly love someone. I never had that feeling. Looking at it all now, your leaving me should have hurt a lot more than it did. It was more the inconvience of having to reevaluate my life, sorting out my goals and what I want out of life. I think we just get ourselves in a rut and it suits to stay there because its safe. I must admit over the past few months I have been thinking, is this what I want my life to be like over the next 20 years. The answer was No but I had the kids to think of first and foremost and would never have done anything to upset them. I would have carried on through life wondering what if but at least the kids would have been happy. There were good times and bad. The good I am thankful for the bad I would like to forget.
Maybe you are right I probably do have a bit of an attitude now but given the circumstances and you in my position do you honestly think you would have been any different (Think hard on this one).
I thought I was a forgiving person but things that have been said and done over the past 2 years have made that not possible for me at the moment. I suppose in time it will happen but not right now. Promises that were made and broken have seen to that.
I’m sad at the way things have turned out as far as our relationship goes but that all comes under the forgiving thing but they say time is a great healer (I hope so). We will always have contact as far as the kids go.
I have never really told the kids how I feel because I didn’t want it to affect there relationship with you and believe me I do want them to have one with you. As you said you are still there father and I know that you do love them. I will never interfere with that but as I said to you and them it will be on their terms.
I was not trying to interfere in your life as far as you telling the kids things I was only trying to get you to see that preparing them for things instead of putting them on the spot was a better way. I have been a mother for 18 years and sometimes we get a feeling for these things more so than a father (that is not a dig at you). But that is your decision as you put it.
I really hope you find whatever it is that your looking for. Life is far too short.
This email is to help me move on and for you to have a better understanding of me. I am not a bad person and you are right I do deserve better. We just never really had anything in common (apart from the kids). Our priorities were different.
Do not respond to this email. I said I would send you my feelings. Now you will have a better understanding of where I am at.
As for the houses another option is for me to keep Lindsay St and you to have the other two. We could wait for the valuations to see whether it is an option. Means I don’t have to move and you could leave your tenants in the other houses
Just a thought.
Pam Cox ;-)