(no subject)
compassion is a good thing.
at least i think. so there's this homeless lady that comes into the community center (where i work at the desk in my apt complex in leonardtown) and goes to sleep at a table in the multipurpose room. she's in like...her 40s and clearly doesn't belong here (although i honestly used to think she was a student but then realized she did this basically EVERY night and was always wearing the same clothes).
our supervisor spoke with her one night and told her she couldn't be here if she wasn't an ltown resident, and he told us to call the campus police if she returned.
tonight around midnight, right as my shift started, she knocked on the door and i buzzed her in. because like...what else am i gonna do, let her stare at me from outside the door? (yes that's probably what i should do). and i called the campus police and told them and they came and escorted her out and i just felt terrible. she gave me this really sad look as she walked out. and i honestly wouldn't have called the police on her except the person who was working before me was still here and pressured me into it, and to be fair, we were given that explicit instruction. i just don't feel threatened by her at all and i feel bad for her.
and of course the police are saying that she should be medicated and isn't stable and even if she doesn't feel threatening you never know when something could happen blah blah blah. and they might be right i guess.
i've talked about the situation with some co-workers and basically keep getting told i need to be more assertive. but i don't understand why assertiveness and compassion have to be mutually exclusive.
homelessness is such a problem in this county, and sure it isn't really my cause and i've done nothing about it and am not comfortable with it either (who enjoys being asked for money on the street?). but this is complicated right? like... i know i can't be the only one who thinks it's complicated and who doesn't really want to be the one to address it but also doesn't want to lose all of my compassion.
maybe it's wasted compassion if i'm not doing anything about it. i mean i have no idea how i would help her. i just don't like being judged for feeling bad for her. i hate how our society values money and assertiveness and individualism but we forget about compassion and community. not to say the first three values are always bad but don't we need a little balance? i don't really want to live in a world where i'm afraid to have compassion for someone.
at least i think. so there's this homeless lady that comes into the community center (where i work at the desk in my apt complex in leonardtown) and goes to sleep at a table in the multipurpose room. she's in like...her 40s and clearly doesn't belong here (although i honestly used to think she was a student but then realized she did this basically EVERY night and was always wearing the same clothes).
our supervisor spoke with her one night and told her she couldn't be here if she wasn't an ltown resident, and he told us to call the campus police if she returned.
tonight around midnight, right as my shift started, she knocked on the door and i buzzed her in. because like...what else am i gonna do, let her stare at me from outside the door? (yes that's probably what i should do). and i called the campus police and told them and they came and escorted her out and i just felt terrible. she gave me this really sad look as she walked out. and i honestly wouldn't have called the police on her except the person who was working before me was still here and pressured me into it, and to be fair, we were given that explicit instruction. i just don't feel threatened by her at all and i feel bad for her.
and of course the police are saying that she should be medicated and isn't stable and even if she doesn't feel threatening you never know when something could happen blah blah blah. and they might be right i guess.
i've talked about the situation with some co-workers and basically keep getting told i need to be more assertive. but i don't understand why assertiveness and compassion have to be mutually exclusive.
homelessness is such a problem in this county, and sure it isn't really my cause and i've done nothing about it and am not comfortable with it either (who enjoys being asked for money on the street?). but this is complicated right? like... i know i can't be the only one who thinks it's complicated and who doesn't really want to be the one to address it but also doesn't want to lose all of my compassion.
maybe it's wasted compassion if i'm not doing anything about it. i mean i have no idea how i would help her. i just don't like being judged for feeling bad for her. i hate how our society values money and assertiveness and individualism but we forget about compassion and community. not to say the first three values are always bad but don't we need a little balance? i don't really want to live in a world where i'm afraid to have compassion for someone.