Feb 02, 2007 18:57
I feel numb, i feel crushed..for no reason. I have been feeling like this for about 3 weeks..just like a nothing. I have no one to talk to with out just holding me, and telling me everything will be ok...i dont even have a reason to feel sad. When i am with friends i am not happy, when i am alonei am not happy...y i am i never happy ne more...It is like a huge wave of depression has just taken over my life. When ever i am alone all i do it cry. I dont know what to do or think...i act ahppy but inside i know i am not. I dont talk all day but yet i feel guilty for my actions. I have no confidence in myself...i sleep all day, and i dont feel like doing anything. I just want one day to go by with nothing wrong...i just want to not cry, no feel guilty, and to be excited about something. I just feel empty all of the time, like nothing ever makes me happy...i used to get excited over the smallest things, and now, i dont smile at all...i just want some one to hold me, and let me cry with out telling me to stop...i want some one to tell me i will be ok...i am scared. for no reason. i dont feel like me, and i think that is y. but who am i...i dont know...am i doing the right things, makeing the right choses...i am so sick of trying to make other people happy...what happened to making ME happy...i miss times of when i was happy..i miss times of when i didnt worry. I have no one. Not even myself ne more. I really questoin weather or not i should be here...if i make people so miserable y am i...but yet i dont even know if i do. I want to smile. I want to laugh. But i dont know y i cant. I dont even want to try anymore.