(no subject)
They only want you when you're seventeen...
Well. I'm no longer 17. People keep asking me, how does it feel to be 18? Honestly, it feels no different than yesterday,
I've waited since I was a little girl for this day, waited to be an adult and be able to make my own decisions. Now, all I want is to be that little girl again. Nieve, innocent, happy. I want to be 3 again, putting band-aids on stuffed animals. It sucks when you learn that band-aids dont fix everything, and mommy can't always kiss it better. When you learn that the world isn't as big as it once seemed, and not nearly as beautiful. When the years start to feel more like months instead of decades.
I think this year is going to be a major turning point for me. I think by my next birthday I will be only a shadow of what I am now.
I never want to lose that sense of wonder I had as a child.
I never want to lose that sense of joy.
In this odd transition from child to "ädult," I find myself quite afraid.
Afraid of whats to come.
Afraid of things I've done.
Afraid of things I may do,
I'm afraid of the mistakes.
I'm afraid of the challenges.
I guess I'm just plain afraid.
I don't want to grow up. I want to jump in lakes, catch frogs, pursue butterflies. I want to fall off the monkey bars and scrape my knees. I want to look forward to things again.
When I was young, it seemed there was so much to discover, everything was so facinating. As I started to learn more and more, less and less of it interested me as much. Nothing seems as exciting anymore. The world was such a huge, beautifl place. Now I just feel like I'm only waiting to get old and die.
I wish I could stay 17 forever.
Unfortunately, nothing is forever.
Well. I'm no longer 17. People keep asking me, how does it feel to be 18? Honestly, it feels no different than yesterday,
I've waited since I was a little girl for this day, waited to be an adult and be able to make my own decisions. Now, all I want is to be that little girl again. Nieve, innocent, happy. I want to be 3 again, putting band-aids on stuffed animals. It sucks when you learn that band-aids dont fix everything, and mommy can't always kiss it better. When you learn that the world isn't as big as it once seemed, and not nearly as beautiful. When the years start to feel more like months instead of decades.
I think this year is going to be a major turning point for me. I think by my next birthday I will be only a shadow of what I am now.
I never want to lose that sense of wonder I had as a child.
I never want to lose that sense of joy.
In this odd transition from child to "ädult," I find myself quite afraid.
Afraid of whats to come.
Afraid of things I've done.
Afraid of things I may do,
I'm afraid of the mistakes.
I'm afraid of the challenges.
I guess I'm just plain afraid.
I don't want to grow up. I want to jump in lakes, catch frogs, pursue butterflies. I want to fall off the monkey bars and scrape my knees. I want to look forward to things again.
When I was young, it seemed there was so much to discover, everything was so facinating. As I started to learn more and more, less and less of it interested me as much. Nothing seems as exciting anymore. The world was such a huge, beautifl place. Now I just feel like I'm only waiting to get old and die.
I wish I could stay 17 forever.
Unfortunately, nothing is forever.