Thoughts
Since Boxing Day I've had the flu. I'm feeling alot lot better today (I only just got up at er 1.15am!)though Christmas has been pretty shit because I've been sleeping or feeling like death most of the time. I haven't been out of the house since Christmas day. How depressing. I haven't even looked at my presents since opening them.
When I've been burning up, been trying to sleep in bed inbetween the coughing and tossing and turning and awfulness I have been having the most awful upsetting thoughts. I think it's partly being poorly and partly anxiety/depression rearing it's head because I've been so shut in and because I'm so upset that Christmas has been a wash out. I've had terrible thoughts...things like my baby nephew being dead and every graphical detail to go along with thoughts like that. It's scary and horrible and has made me feel physically sick. Horrible thought after horrible thought.
I know this isn't a cheerful or Christmassy post. I'm sorry. Tommorrow, if I'm feeling better I'll write about pre-flu Christmas and presents and things.
In good news, Charley has his first tooth!
When I've been burning up, been trying to sleep in bed inbetween the coughing and tossing and turning and awfulness I have been having the most awful upsetting thoughts. I think it's partly being poorly and partly anxiety/depression rearing it's head because I've been so shut in and because I'm so upset that Christmas has been a wash out. I've had terrible thoughts...things like my baby nephew being dead and every graphical detail to go along with thoughts like that. It's scary and horrible and has made me feel physically sick. Horrible thought after horrible thought.
I know this isn't a cheerful or Christmassy post. I'm sorry. Tommorrow, if I'm feeling better I'll write about pre-flu Christmas and presents and things.
In good news, Charley has his first tooth!