The story of the engagement
I want to put this, here, to remind myself later. I think how Ben and I got engaged really speaks of the nature of our relationship, and I want to remember that.
Months and months and months ago, we agreed we each needed to know someone a year before deciding to marry them. Sunday, Sept. 8th was our one-year anniversary.
Ben asked me to let him take me out to a nice dinner Saturday. Oh! I found somewhere we hadn't been before, where I could eat. I realized I was dissatisfied with my selections for warm-September dress up wear. I found an awesome dress Friday afternoon. I got all gussied up Saturday afternoon - painted my toenails, picked out earrings, even put on Spanx to give a nice, smooth line under the dress. Now, Spanx are a HUGE improvement over the girdles of yore. They don't threaten to pinch your legs off at the hip. But geeze, the "waistband" (can you call it that when it's right up in your boob pits?) digs. Ben put on a button down shirt, and real, lace-up dress shoes, which pinched. We were the only ones at the restaurant. The whole dinner. Where we sat, the sun was behind Ben's head, so I couldn't see his eyes. We like looking into each other's eyes. The food was good, but the dinner was not magical. I suggested that rather than getting dessert there, we get Christian yogurt,* go home, change clothes, and hang out on the back deck.
We got our yogurt, threw it in the freezer at Ben's house, and escaped our pretty clothes. I cannot take off Spanx over my Tevas. Penguin walking down the hallway to where I could plunk on the bed and take things off in the proper order was fun and amused both of us. In comfy clothes, we grabbed our yogurt and went out back to eat. The dogs were reasonably calm. Yogurt eaten, Ben leaned from his chair to give me a kiss. I had to lean in, too. Kissy, kissy, kissy, SLURP! Ben's dog Heathcliff executed an Epic Cock Block. I only had a hint of slobber. Ben got licked all the way up one side of his face. Kinda broke the romantic moment.
There was lots of cuddling and talking about how good life is and how much we liked each other and how we would love each other forever and ever. We like complimenting each other. We also seem to like to imagine what sort of nursing home antics we would engage in together in our dotage.
Meanwhile, I was torturing myself how to ask him if he wanted to get married. And torture. And torture.
Sunday morning, we took his other dog Keiko to get groomed, kanoodled a bit, went to breakfast, and then gave Heathcliff a bath. Heathcliff is a bit of a wuss, and washing him is not easy. The only thing you can do is strip to your undies and go for it - Ben lifts him into the tub and stays in it with him. Afterwards, we flopped on the bed to catch our breath and dry out. Some cuddling, some just lying next to each other talking. Sometimes, we just do that - tangle up together and talk about life, the universe, and everything. Every night we spend together, we cuddle a bit before rolling over to go to sleep (with butts touching! we're goobers!). I continued to torture myself about how to ask, and then finally go out with it: "Would you like to maybe get married?" Ben's eyes got wide and he was quiet. "Really?" "yeah" "Yes!" Much cuddling and we each almost cried and then we had to plotz and giggle and be silly.
* Our local frozen yogurt place has aggressively friendly staff. This puzzled me, until one day I heard contemporary Christian music being piped in. Oh. Happy Christians. So now we call it Christian yogurt.
Months and months and months ago, we agreed we each needed to know someone a year before deciding to marry them. Sunday, Sept. 8th was our one-year anniversary.
Ben asked me to let him take me out to a nice dinner Saturday. Oh! I found somewhere we hadn't been before, where I could eat. I realized I was dissatisfied with my selections for warm-September dress up wear. I found an awesome dress Friday afternoon. I got all gussied up Saturday afternoon - painted my toenails, picked out earrings, even put on Spanx to give a nice, smooth line under the dress. Now, Spanx are a HUGE improvement over the girdles of yore. They don't threaten to pinch your legs off at the hip. But geeze, the "waistband" (can you call it that when it's right up in your boob pits?) digs. Ben put on a button down shirt, and real, lace-up dress shoes, which pinched. We were the only ones at the restaurant. The whole dinner. Where we sat, the sun was behind Ben's head, so I couldn't see his eyes. We like looking into each other's eyes. The food was good, but the dinner was not magical. I suggested that rather than getting dessert there, we get Christian yogurt,* go home, change clothes, and hang out on the back deck.
We got our yogurt, threw it in the freezer at Ben's house, and escaped our pretty clothes. I cannot take off Spanx over my Tevas. Penguin walking down the hallway to where I could plunk on the bed and take things off in the proper order was fun and amused both of us. In comfy clothes, we grabbed our yogurt and went out back to eat. The dogs were reasonably calm. Yogurt eaten, Ben leaned from his chair to give me a kiss. I had to lean in, too. Kissy, kissy, kissy, SLURP! Ben's dog Heathcliff executed an Epic Cock Block. I only had a hint of slobber. Ben got licked all the way up one side of his face. Kinda broke the romantic moment.
There was lots of cuddling and talking about how good life is and how much we liked each other and how we would love each other forever and ever. We like complimenting each other. We also seem to like to imagine what sort of nursing home antics we would engage in together in our dotage.
Meanwhile, I was torturing myself how to ask him if he wanted to get married. And torture. And torture.
Sunday morning, we took his other dog Keiko to get groomed, kanoodled a bit, went to breakfast, and then gave Heathcliff a bath. Heathcliff is a bit of a wuss, and washing him is not easy. The only thing you can do is strip to your undies and go for it - Ben lifts him into the tub and stays in it with him. Afterwards, we flopped on the bed to catch our breath and dry out. Some cuddling, some just lying next to each other talking. Sometimes, we just do that - tangle up together and talk about life, the universe, and everything. Every night we spend together, we cuddle a bit before rolling over to go to sleep (with butts touching! we're goobers!). I continued to torture myself about how to ask, and then finally go out with it: "Would you like to maybe get married?" Ben's eyes got wide and he was quiet. "Really?" "yeah" "Yes!" Much cuddling and we each almost cried and then we had to plotz and giggle and be silly.
* Our local frozen yogurt place has aggressively friendly staff. This puzzled me, until one day I heard contemporary Christian music being piped in. Oh. Happy Christians. So now we call it Christian yogurt.