(no subject)
i hate winter. it drives me fucking crazy. i dont like this point in my life right now. well no. i shouldnt say that. because i am really happy. but i dont know if i like being 20. sounds lame. i know. i miss living in narragansett. i hate living in warwick. its not even the cool part of warwick. there is no ocean. i kinda just feel like bitching right now. i wish i was closer to certain people. i feel incomplete in some ways. you grow apart without even realizing it. and then when you do realize it everything is different. its like the people that have shaped your life arent there anyone. so then who are you without them. you grow up together and they know all your secrets. you think things will always be that way. but then they just arent. i miss narragansett/coventry. my home. i hate my dad. its been months since we've talked. i'd like to keep it that way. i love my friends. more than anything in this world. my mom/grandmother seth and my friends are the only things i need to be happy. i miss my friends. i miss them sooo bad. my life up to this point has been amazing. i wouldnt change a thing. even the bad parts of it. i wish there was a button to press. to just keep reliving my life. i dont really want to grow older. i liked things they were before. and i dont think anything could top that. thats why im scared. that i already lived the best part of my life. and the next 60 years will just be so so. i cant say that though. there is so much to come. just bring me summer for now and ill be happy.