So that WIP meme thing
I actually have several SGA WIPs I've been meaning to finish forever. Here there be excerpts of a few of them (maybe I'll finally get something done when someone bugs me about it):
Low Probability:
Rodney knew he was going to die here.
Of course, he'd also known he was going to choke on lemon pie, as he'd known he'd be burned, tied to a stake. Contrary to popular opinion*, he'd found that knowing the exact moment of one's demise usually gave one ample opportunity to take the appropriate countermeasures.
But still.
+++
* i.e. Granny Weatherwax's opinion. This is witchcraft we're talking about.
+++
Rodney and the Homeshopping King: Rodney McKay is a maligned scientist, kicked out of his cushy post at a leading university. When no other school will hire him, he falls back on his high school hobby--inventing simple items to help around the house. The problem is, his abrasive personality makes selling his brilliant inventions hard. Enter John Sheppard, king of late night infomercials. John's sure his good looks and charm can help sell Rodney's products, but first they'll have to sell John to Rodney...
"Oh, come on, how can you not want a self-cleaning litter box!" Rodney slammed his hand against the button with more force than was strictly necessary and the blue little construction whirred to life. With smooth mechanical movements, the automatic sieve separated the fake cat droppings from the litter, then rose with a hydraulic hiss. The top of the litter box slid out from underneath the sieve to reveal a smooth-walled container, wherein the plastic poop was unceremoniously dumped. The box slid back into place and the sieve buried itself beneath the litter, ready to do its job once more with the next press of the button.
"I'm certain your invention would be welcome in more than one household, Dr. McKay," Brian Cowen, CEO of Genii Industries Ltd. - distributor of the Radiant™ cell phone batteries and the infamous Nuke'Em™ cockroach traps - commented dryly. "However, your insistence to sell your products yourself is of some concern to our board of directors."
"I am not going to have a dim-witted would-be actor who spent more money on their dental work than on their education gush over how 'prettily blue' the LitterPal is and then proceed to break it on camera!" The mere thought made him want to puke. If anyone could explain the function of Rodney's inventions properly, it was Rodney himself.
Inconvenient:
"What, and I'm supposed to believe you're just that altruistic? You?"
Rodney stares at him like he's been slapped, white-faced and open-mouthed, like he can't believe John really just said that. And yeah, John is kind of surprised himself, but the words are out there now and he refuses to take them back. He wants to know - he deserves to know, god damn it! - why Rodney would do this; why he would give up his dream of a long-legged blonde and marry John; why he would walk around a military contingent that's made up of seventy percent U.S. forces and pretend he was gay; just, why?
And of course this one: Tremble:
Carefully, he spread Sheppard's legs and pulled the limp body onto his lap until he could feel his erection slide into the slick cleft between Sheppard's ass cheeks. Guided his cock against Sheppard's hole and pushed slowly, smoothly into the relaxed channel. Hot, wet, completely unresisting, and he groaned. He was about halfway in and about to push in the rest of the way, when a thought occurred to him.
Sheppard's head lolled back when Rodney grabbed his upper arms and pulled him upright, gasping at the way Sheppard's ass muscles moved into an entirely new and interesting position. He slipped his arms around Sheppard's back, leaning the other man's torso against his chest, supporting his weight. Sheppard's head rolled forward again, slumped heavily onto Rodney's shoulder, soft hair tickling his cheek. He could feel the still parted lips slightly moist against his skin where shoulder met neck, warm breath brushing over his throat at regular intervals. Rodney reached down to grab Sheppard's ass, lifted him up just a little bit, changed their angle - and then Sheppard's body was just sinking down Rodney's cock until he was sprawled fully impaled in Rodney's lap.
Bless gravity.
Low Probability:
Rodney knew he was going to die here.
Of course, he'd also known he was going to choke on lemon pie, as he'd known he'd be burned, tied to a stake. Contrary to popular opinion*, he'd found that knowing the exact moment of one's demise usually gave one ample opportunity to take the appropriate countermeasures.
But still.
+++
* i.e. Granny Weatherwax's opinion. This is witchcraft we're talking about.
+++
Rodney and the Homeshopping King: Rodney McKay is a maligned scientist, kicked out of his cushy post at a leading university. When no other school will hire him, he falls back on his high school hobby--inventing simple items to help around the house. The problem is, his abrasive personality makes selling his brilliant inventions hard. Enter John Sheppard, king of late night infomercials. John's sure his good looks and charm can help sell Rodney's products, but first they'll have to sell John to Rodney...
"Oh, come on, how can you not want a self-cleaning litter box!" Rodney slammed his hand against the button with more force than was strictly necessary and the blue little construction whirred to life. With smooth mechanical movements, the automatic sieve separated the fake cat droppings from the litter, then rose with a hydraulic hiss. The top of the litter box slid out from underneath the sieve to reveal a smooth-walled container, wherein the plastic poop was unceremoniously dumped. The box slid back into place and the sieve buried itself beneath the litter, ready to do its job once more with the next press of the button.
"I'm certain your invention would be welcome in more than one household, Dr. McKay," Brian Cowen, CEO of Genii Industries Ltd. - distributor of the Radiant™ cell phone batteries and the infamous Nuke'Em™ cockroach traps - commented dryly. "However, your insistence to sell your products yourself is of some concern to our board of directors."
"I am not going to have a dim-witted would-be actor who spent more money on their dental work than on their education gush over how 'prettily blue' the LitterPal is and then proceed to break it on camera!" The mere thought made him want to puke. If anyone could explain the function of Rodney's inventions properly, it was Rodney himself.
Inconvenient:
"What, and I'm supposed to believe you're just that altruistic? You?"
Rodney stares at him like he's been slapped, white-faced and open-mouthed, like he can't believe John really just said that. And yeah, John is kind of surprised himself, but the words are out there now and he refuses to take them back. He wants to know - he deserves to know, god damn it! - why Rodney would do this; why he would give up his dream of a long-legged blonde and marry John; why he would walk around a military contingent that's made up of seventy percent U.S. forces and pretend he was gay; just, why?
And of course this one: Tremble:
Carefully, he spread Sheppard's legs and pulled the limp body onto his lap until he could feel his erection slide into the slick cleft between Sheppard's ass cheeks. Guided his cock against Sheppard's hole and pushed slowly, smoothly into the relaxed channel. Hot, wet, completely unresisting, and he groaned. He was about halfway in and about to push in the rest of the way, when a thought occurred to him.
Sheppard's head lolled back when Rodney grabbed his upper arms and pulled him upright, gasping at the way Sheppard's ass muscles moved into an entirely new and interesting position. He slipped his arms around Sheppard's back, leaning the other man's torso against his chest, supporting his weight. Sheppard's head rolled forward again, slumped heavily onto Rodney's shoulder, soft hair tickling his cheek. He could feel the still parted lips slightly moist against his skin where shoulder met neck, warm breath brushing over his throat at regular intervals. Rodney reached down to grab Sheppard's ass, lifted him up just a little bit, changed their angle - and then Sheppard's body was just sinking down Rodney's cock until he was sprawled fully impaled in Rodney's lap.
Bless gravity.