It is done!
While You Were Sleeping SGA Redux 8/8
Pairing: Mckay/Sheppard
Rating: PG-13, sadly. Overall NC-17
Summary: Rodney McKay is an ordinary guy who just happens to rescue the woman he's been pining for from afar for months. Now she's in a coma and her family thinks they're engaged - except for her brother, John. And that's not the only problem, because over the course of a crazy week, Rodney finds himself falling harder than he ever has before.
Notes: Again, for the last time, fusing While You Were Sleeping and Stargate: Atlantis. I can't believe I really finished this - thanks to nightfreyja, who bribed into writing the damn ending. *laughs* This has been great fun, shameless plagiarism, and I thank everyone who kept commenting and asking for more. Really, you guys are the greatest!
Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five Part Six Part Seven
~~~
It was early afternoon when Rodney went to return Elizabeth's stuff. He'd been tempted to simply hand it over to Radek and avoid the accusing stares he knew where waiting for him, but he figured he owed Elizabeth a personal apology for the mess he'd made. He couldn't regret being part of her family for a precious few days, not really. This last week had been easily the happiest time of his life. But he could regret the way he'd gotten into that lucky position, by lying and cheating to some of the greatest people he knew, and he did. Regret that. Almost as much as he regretted the fact that it was over.
Elizabeth was dozing when he entered the room, and Rodney tried to be as quiet as possible as he walked over to the small corner table. Being willing to apologise was one thing, being able to get around it without stirring up more trouble quite another, and preferable at that.
"Rodney."
Rodney stilled, his fingers tightening painfully around the handles of the box he was carrying. Forcing yet another smile on his face, he turned to face Elizabeth's open expression.
"Elizabeth, uh. Hi."
"Hi." She stared at him, searching, and Rodney tried very hard not to squirm. She was probably trying to find out what kind of man betrayed a desperate family. He would have liked to know the answer to that himself.
"I, uh, I brought your things," he said, offering the box. Waiting for the accusations to start. Or the disappointment to show on that beautiful face. Elizabeth really was every bit as charming as he remembered. She had her brother's eyes… which was entirely irrelevant and not helpful. At all.
"Say, Rodney."
"Yes?" Here we go.
"Would you like my Jell-O?"
Huh?
"I, uh, no. No, thank you. Um. Do you, uh, can I get you anything?" What was this, some new and inventive way of torture? Why couldn't she just damn him to hell and be done with it?
"I miss ice-cream," Elizabeth sighed wistfully, still staring at him. Waiting for him to break?
"Baskin-Robbins?"
"Oh, yes."
"I, uh, like caramel," Rodney said stupidly, and she smiled.
"That's my favourite."
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Huh." They stared at each other for a year-long moment, then Elizabeth pointed at the nearby plastic chair.
"Please sit down."
Rodney did, warily, trying to avoid her wide-eyed gaze. Was it possible she still didn't know? Perhaps Radek had started with the rest of the family and they hadn't been here yet. "I, uh, I saw a picture of you. When you, uh, won the national spelling bee."
"Ah, yes. Past glory." She waved it away, embarrassed, and Rodney was enchanted by her modesty. He'd probably have a framed copy of that article hanging on his wall.
"Well, I guess we don't get to do that many great things when we grow up."
"Oh, but you did!"
"Oh, please. Jumping in front of a train isn't great, it's stupid. Uh, no offence."
"None taken." Elizabeth finally stopped staring at him to gaze pensively at the far wall. "I don't think I've ever done anything truly selfless. I mean, yes, I helped reunite Germany, but that's my job."
"Well, a lot of people do their jobs without putting in an effort, so that's got to count for something. And, uh, I've seen you give up your seat in the train, several times. That's pretty selfless."
"But hardly great."
"It is for the person who gets to sit down." Rodney paused, trying to find a way to cheer her up. He thought back to the day he first saw her, and to every morning since. "And I looked forward to your smile every morning. That did have a certain greatness."
Elizabeth was staring again, this time with a slight frown. "You know, I think I do remember you." She smiled. "Isn't that great?"
Rodney smiled back, knowing he was just digging his own grave a little deeper and not caring in the face of that lovely smile. So he'd keep pretending for a little while, no problem. He had developed a routine by now.
He was a sick and depraved person.
~~~
Back in Elizabeth's apartment building, a dark-skinned man strode confidently through the door and walked to the elevator with quick, sure steps.
"Excuse me!" The doorman hurried to follow him. "Sir, excuse me!"
The man stopped and turned around, his impatience clear in his posture. "What?"
"Sir, I'm sorry, but I have to sign you in."
The man eyed the poor doorman up and down. "You're new."
"Uh, yes, sir." The doorman looked apologetic. "What apartment?"
"Elizabeth Weir's apartment. 57G."
"Thank you, sir. And your name, please?"
"Norman Bates. I'm Dr. Weir's fiancé."
The doorman chuckled at that. "Pardon, sir, but you're not."
Norman stared at him in incredulity. "What?"
~~~
"Hey. You're looking great."
"Thank you, John." Elizabeth gave her brother a smile as the nurse helped her sit down in a wheelchair.
"What's that for?" he asked, pointing at it.
"Oh, they're moving me to the second floor. Apparently I'm well enough to share a room."
"Cool. You'll get to charm new people." John grinned at her, then motioned at the nurse. "Hey, can I drive that thing?"
"Sure," the guy said, stepping back from both wheelchair and hospital regulations. "I'll meet you at the elevators."
"All right." John grabbed the handles, and off they went. It was a cool wheelchair, with a little IV stand attached, and he noticed that it could be folded up when it wasn't used. Elizabeth complained about the cold hospital air as they made their way to the elevators - and true, her red silk bathrobe looked pretty but not very warm. And she was about to get even colder. "Here. I smuggled something in for you."
Elizabeth gave a delighted little squeak as John pulled the container of Baskin-Robbins from under his jacket. "Ohhh, caramel, thank you!"
"Only the best for my big sister. Here you go." John handed her the spoon and she dug in, once again making him wonder how a person with her eating habits could stay that thin.
"Oh, say, have you met Rodney?" she asked around a mouthful of ice-cream. At his nod, she smiled. "He's terrific, isn't he?"
"Yeah, he is." He was, with his crooked smile and honest blue eyes and soft skin and don't go there, John. He wasn't jealous of his sister. She was happy, Rodney was happy, everybody was happy. John would get a terrific brother-in-law. That was… that was cool. That was… terrific.
Elizabeth was waxing poetic about the joys of ice-cream when they reached the elevators. "It tastes better than I remembered. Everything is better, looks better, feels better - even this caramel ice-cream."
"That's nice. It's vanilla, by the way."
"Oh?" They stopped and waited for the nurse to arrive. "I don't care. I'm a new person, John. I'm getting a second chance. Forget about the past, I'm a new Elizabeth."
"Well, that's nice to hear." John started to pace. He really hoped the nurse would show up before this turned into something mushy.
"You know, I don't even know what my secretary got you for Christmas," Elizabeth admitted, a thoughtful look on her face. Great. Now they were confessing stuff. Hey, while we're at it, I slept with your boyfriend.
"It was a sweater. A very nice one. Hey, speaking of sweaters, did you-"
"I betrayed my husband." Oh, God.
"You know, I think I'd better-" John pointed down the hall, already turning away from her guilty face.
"Remember the spelling bee?"
He turned back. "I don't want to know this, do I."
"I knew the words. Mrs. Mal Doran told them to me so she'd look good as a teacher."
John couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Elizabeth! You cheated?" She nodded glumly, and John just had to ask. "Does Rodney know about this?"
"No! I'm the new Elizabeth with Rodney. He is…" Elizabeth paused, looking for the right words to describe her fiancé. "He is, what is he…"
"He's one of the most open people you'll ever meet," John said, thinking of the way Rodney's feelings were always right there on his face. "He drives you crazy with his arrogance and is still so vulnerable that you never want to hurt him." He ran a shaky hand through his hair, remembering how Rodney had touched him, clumsy and awed and like John was worth something. Everything. "He'll probably kill someone to get into a space shuttle, no matter if it's American or Russian or Japanese, and I don't know if that's scary or just…" and he had to smile, "kind of cute."
Elizabeth nodded contemplatively, then she frowned. "No, I don't think that's it."
John felt like he'd been hit. Of course Elizabeth's relationship to Rodney would be different, how could it not be? She probably got to see sides of him John never would, and that was okay, really. Except…
Except it wasn't. Except he wanted what she had, for the first time in his life. And he didn't know what to do about it.
"But I'm sure there's something special about him," Elizabeth continued blithely, "and I'll have the rest of my life to figure out what it is."
Disgusted with her luck and his own envy, John left her sitting in front of the elevators, talking with herself. He had to get that man out of his system. Fast.
~~~
Radek was smiling when Rodney met him in front of the hospital, so he took that to mean that the deed was done. He felt… relieved, kind of. Awful and guilty and afraid of what might happen next, but also relieved. "What did they say?"
"Who?" Radek wanted to know.
"The, the Sheppards." Rodney glanced over to the hospital doors. "Are they inside? Did they yell? What did they say?"
"Ah. No, you just missed them." Radek pushed his glasses up his nose and Rodney could have cheerfully strangled him.
"Well that's nice, so I guess my untimely demise has been rescheduled for another day. For God's sake, Radek, what did they say?"
"Nothing. I did not tell them yet."
"What? Radek, you said you were going to take care of it!"
"I am taking take of it."
"Like hell you are, all you're doing is drawing it out! What the hell did I ever do to you?"
"Rodney, would you please calm down?"
"No! No I'm not going to calm down, this is, this is my life we're talking about, and you said you'd help me!"
"I am!"
Rodney stared at the other man until Radek started to fidget. "No, you know what? If this is your idea of help, you're fired."
Radek blinked. "I'm… fired, what?" But Rodney didn't pay any more attention to him. This would end, right now. He turned around to walk into the hospital, almost running into a dark-skinned man who was also on his way inside. "Pardon."
"Excuse me," the guy said, and they ended up in the elevator together.
"Fourth floor, please," Rodney told the elderly woman next to the floor buttons, so nervous he barely heard the dark-skinned man say, "Second, please."
They were going to kill him. But he'd rather confess to Elizabeth than look into John's accusing eyes. He knew he'd never really had a chance with either of them, but if he had to choose, he knew which one of the siblings he wanted to grow old with.
Too bad that was never going to happen.
~~~
Norman strode down the hospital corridor, fuming. While he was heroically doing his duty protecting the oil fields in Iraq, not only did Elizabeth find herself some new guy, no, she even had the gall to get engaged! Before he'd even asked her! He'd known she was a difficult woman, but this was unacceptable.
Some nurse was changing Elizabeth's IV when Norman entered the room. Another woman, a petite thing with reddish-blonde hair, was sitting in the bed by the window, reading. Elizabeth looked up when she heard the door and smiled at Norman.
"Norman!"
"Elizabeth." Something in his expression must have told the nurse that this was going to be a private conversation, for the man hurried to finish fixing the IV and quickly left the room. Too bad the blonde by the window couldn't get lost as easily. "I hear you're engaged?"
"Yes." She beamed, and a vein in Norman's temple started to throb.
"May I remind you that you were going to marry me?"
Elizabeth looked at him, apparently puzzled. "You broke up with me, remember? When I said the war in Iraq was foolish and dangerous?"
"We did not break up, I agreed to give you some space to think. I didn't realise that meant you were going to burn all bridges and marry the first loser you met."
Elizabeth shook her head. "Rodney is no loser."
"Rodney?" Even the name sounded pathetic. "'Rodney' who?" Norman demanded, ignoring window girl who had apparently decided that they were more entertaining than whatever crap she was reading, judging from the wide-eyed way she was watching them.
"I don't know." Elizabeth shrugged, smiling again. "I have amnesia."
"Amnesia," Norman repeated slowly, and window girl's head bobbed along with Elizabeth's empathetic nod. "Are you fucking with me?"
"No."
All right, fine. If that was the way she wanted to play it: "I want the cat back."
"Sure. But then I want my stuff back, too."
"Your stuff?" Norman laughed. "Like what?"
"Your dick." Elizabeth nodded in the general direction of his privates, and Norman barely resisted the urge to cup them protectively as he felt himself blanch.
"What, are you crazy? You can't have my dick!"
"Well, I don't want to be unreasonable about this. I'd be satisfied with the three inches I paid for."
Window girl's eyes were bulging as she stared at Norman's groin. Disgusted with women in general, he straightened and snapped, "Fine, keep the damn cat, be happy with your wimp. See if he likes to play with one nipple!" With those parting words, Norman strode out of the room, his gut churning with humiliation. To think he'd wanted to marry that… that bitch! Taking away his dick - the nerve! Scowling, Norman stepped into the elevator, waiting until the doors had closed before he readjusted himself.
Just checking.
~~~
Katie Brown stared open-mouthed after the retreating soldier. "Wow, Elizabeth. On to raise your flag on the next pole, huh?"
Elizabeth smiled smugly and said nothing.
~~~
"Rodney!" Laura Cadman's voice made Rodney turn around with something akin to gratitude. Elizabeth's room was empty, her things packed and gone, and the stupid blonde at the nurses' station wouldn't tell him if she'd been discharged. Certainly Cadman would- "They moved her."
Bingo. Wait. "They moved her? Why?"
"Because she's no longer a case for the ICU?" Cadman's voice clearly implied the 'duh'. "Come on, I'll take you."
Not even two minutes later, Cadman was dragging him down a corridor and then pushing him through a door. "And there you go."
"Rodney, hi." Elizabeth's expression brightened when she spotted him. She looked gorgeous in her red silk bathrobe, and her cheeks bore a little more colour. Rodney felt his own cheeks flush as he remembered that he had no business even talking to her.
"Elizabeth, you look, uh, you look good. Really good," he told her inanely, cursing himself for delaying the inevitable yet again. He should just tell her and leave, no doubt with her curses following him down the corridor.
"I feel good," she answered brightly, and he nodded.
"Good, that's good, uh, listen-"
"Rodney, I've been thinking. About my life and what has gone wrong in it. I've seen a woman with influence, money, and power. A woman who owns a ranch in Texas as well as banana plantations in Esna."
"Esna?" Rodney asked, confused, and the pretty redhead from the next bed over smiled dreamily: "Egypt."
"I've also seen a woman who is alone," Elizabeth carried on before Rodney could inject anything about how she shouldn't waste her breath on a liar, "who needs a man by her side when she feels lonely, who will stand by her and raise her children."
"I-" What? Children? Was she on medication? Rodney opened his mouth once again to tell her, to tell her, but she wouldn't let him.
"I want you to be that man, Rodney. You saved my life. You gave me a second chance at living. I want to live that life with you."
Rodney felt the blood fall from his face as he swayed on his feet. She couldn't be serious. This was… this was handing him his dreams from a week ago on a plate, surely she couldn't mean what he thought she meant? And even if she did, he couldn't possibly accept it, could he?
"Meredith Rodney McKay. Will you marry me?"
Oh God.
~~~
Steve Jr. was walking down the stairs arm in arm with a cute blonde when John opened the door to Rodney's apartment building. "Hey, uh, Sheppard." John raised his eyebrow at the man's use of his name, but then remembered that it was in capital letters on the truck. "You gonna visit Rodney?"
"Yeah." John smiled and tried to pass the man, but Steve Jr. heartily thumped his shoulder.
"Good choice. He's the hottest guy in this building."
"Hey!" the blonde exclaimed and swatted Kavanagh's arm.
"Oh, uh, you. You're the hottest chick on the block," Kavanagh said lamely, and John had to suppress a snort. The blonde beamed, though, giving Kavanagh a playful slap.
"Aww, Kavanagh!"
"Come on, Simpson. Hot wings are waiting for no man."
"Have fun," John called after them and walked the final steps to Rodney's door, playing with the wedding present in his pocket. A few more days, and Rodney would marry Elizabeth. John knew he should be happy for them. Hell, he was happy for them, in a way. Still he couldn't help feeling a niggling regret when he thought about the easy banter that had been flowing between him and Rodney, about the way they had just seemed to fit together. Not just physically. But Rodney was taken, had been taken from the start, and it had been stupid to pretend otherwise. No matter how much John wanted, Rodney wasn't for him.
He cleared his throat as he knocked, his forced smile widening at the thumps from inside. Rodney's muffled voice from the other side of the door stated very clearly what he thought about the interruption, although his words didn't seem to make much sense: "I don't want to go to the next physics symposium, I'm not wearing my charcoal grey boxers, and I sure as hell won't have sex with-"
The door was yanked open, Rodney's expression one of comical surprise as he finished weakly, "you."
"Well, I don't have much interest in physics anyways," John drawled, one eyebrow raised, "I certainly wouldn't mind seeing your charcoal grey boxers, and I think we already agreed that sex would be a bad idea."
"Yeah," Rodney said faintly, a slight flush creeping up his cheeks. "I, uh, thought you were Kavanagh."
"It's the hair, isn't it?" John deadpanned, and Rodney was startled into a laugh before he opened the door a little further and took a step back.
"Do you want to come in?"
No, see, because that's another really bad idea. "Sure, why not?"
"Sure."
Walking into the cluttered apartment was like walking into a memory. That was where John had dropped his torn pants, that was the door to the bedroom where they'd kissed, that was where-
John cleared his throat, again, nodding at Rodney's formal clothes. "That your wedding gown?"
Rodney looked down his tuxedo. "Yes, I was thinking of virginal white, but then I figured that black is the new, uh, black."
They both avoided one another's eyes, and John would bet his father's business that Rodney's thoughts had taken the same direction as his own at the word 'virginal'. The living room suddenly seemed too small for the two of them, never mind the cat on the sofa. John fumbled for the present in his pocket and hurriedly pressed it into Rodney's hand.
"Here. Uh. I thought I'd go first, make the present more memorable."
"Thank you."
Rodney seemed grateful for the distraction as he took the shapeless lump of brown wrapping paper and started to open it.
"It's… I was buying up some stuff for Dad," John said, suddenly wishing he'd never come here, "and there was…"
"Hmm?" Rodney made an inquiring little sound, but then the last of the paper came loose and he stilled, staring at the model in his hands. "A space shuttle."
"Yeah." It was stupid, mushy, and still John's heart beat faster at the look of quiet awe on Rodney's face, like this was the first time someone had ever went to the trouble to pick out an individual present for him. Thinking back on what little Rodney had told about his family, maybe it was.
"Thank you. This is… certainly memorable." Rodney's voice was thick, his eyes impossibly blue in the dim light of his apartment as he looked up. John wanted to kiss him. He took a few steps back to get himself out of temptation's reach.
"I also wanted to say that Elizabeth is one very lucky girl. I know you two will make each other very happy."
"I- thank you." Rodney swallowed and smiled. "I expect we'll be seeing each other frequently, after the marriage."
"Yeah." John couldn't breathe, his eyes burning from the same thing that was constricting his chest. He had to get away from that smile, before he did something they'd all regret. "I think I better-"
He waved in the general direction of the door and didn't even wait for Rodney's answer before he turned around and very much fled from the smothering emotions that hovered in the too-small apartment. He was halfway down the stairs when Rodney called after him.
"Wait! John?"
John stopped and turned, hands clenching at his side. He met Rodney's uncertain gaze with an easy smile, looking up at his designated brother-in-law. "Yeah?"
"I, uh." Rodney straightened, his expression determined and frightened at the same time. "Is there anything… anything that would prevent me from marrying Elizabeth?"
Yeah. I think I've fallen in love with you, John thought and hated himself for it. He'd messed things up so badly between them already. Even now, Rodney was thinking of all the doubts and accusations John had heaped upon him. No wonder he was feeling insecure. "No," John said firmly with a reassuring smile. "There's nothing."
Rodney hesitated, then he nodded, still looking unhappy. John gave him a last little smile, then he turned and walked away. He needed to drive the truck back to his parents', maybe have a late dinner. And then he needed to get really, really drunk.
~~~
"Here."
"Whassat?"
Rodney shrugged and made his way to the door to Ronon's office, hoping he could get away before-
"McKay."
"What?" Rodney asked, a single step away from freedom.
"A wedding invitation."
"So?"
"So… which one?
"If you'd just-" Rodney stomped back to Ronon's desk and jabbed his finger at the name on the invitation. "There! Elizabeth Weir."
"The coma chick?" Ronon grunted in surprise. "McKay, are you nuts?"
"Oh, sure, because why would I want to marry a gorgeous woman who's obscenely rich and has promised to pull some strings and get me a job at NASA, when I could instead be sitting happily in my tiny booth and spend yet another holiday pushing a stupid button because the only one who misses me at home is my cat!" Rodney exploded. "Yes, clearly I am nuts!"
Ronon had watched the outbreak completely unfazed and was leaning back in his enormous chair, cocking his head at Rodney. "Thought you wanted the brother."
Just like that, Rodney deflated, remembering how John had walked down those stairs. Yeah. He'd wanted the brother, only... he just... "He didn't want me." Under Ronon's sympathetic look, Rodney managed a tiny smile. "Elizabeth does, though." And that was more than he'd ever hoped for.
"You're not gonna be happy, McKay," Ronon said surprisingly softly.
"No, I'm not." Rodney raised his chin and met the larger man's gaze. "But I'll be close."
And close had to count.
~~~
It didn't count, however, if you were only close to punctual on your own wedding day. Rodney had battled doubts and second thoughts nearly the whole night and promptly overslept. Now he was almost as tired as he felt sick, and wasn't this supposed to be a happy day? Because if anything was seriously lacking, it was happiness. Even a slight elation would have been nice, but no. Not a trace of anything remotely smile-inducing. If that wasn't completely wrong, Rodney didn't know what was.
Elizabeth was already waiting when Rodney finally rushed into the chapel, an IV stand at her side, looking slightly impatient. Bad form, McKay. John was standing next to her, their best man, and Rodney felt the lump in his throat tighten a little further at the soft smile the other man was giving him. Everything inside him screamed wrong, wrong, wrong! and yet he was walking down the aisle, trying to smile and failing if Radek's grimace was anything to go by. Everyone was there, the Sheppards, Ronon, Teyla, even Cadman and Elizabeth's shy roommate. Everyone was looking at him, especially the priest, who was grinning happily. He probably loved marrying people.
Oh God, he was going to get married!
Rodney stopped in front of the altar and turned to his bride - his bride! - feeling very close to hyperventilating. Over Elizabeth's shoulder, behind the IV stand, he could see John.
"Dearly beloved," the priest started, "we are gathered here today to-"
"I object," Rodney blurted. Moments later he flushed, not believing he'd really said that. A murmur went through the room, but Rodney's attention was solely on John, who was looking at him with a searching expression.
"Excuse me, but we didn't get to that part yet," the priest stammered, but John nodded.
"I kind of object, too."
Rodney's pulse was racing; he felt hot and cold at the same time. This was far worse than any thesis defence ever could have been. Why was John objecting? Was it possible that-
"Hey, what the hell is going on here?" Art wanted to know, ignoring the priest's reproachful look. Rodney took a deep breath. So this was it.
"I, I'm in love with your son," he explained with a slight stutter, and Art nodded indulgently.
"You mean my daughter."
"No." Rodney's voice cracked. "I… I mean your son."
He barely dared to look at John, who was wearing a slight smile, blinking fast. Elizabeth looked like she'd been hit by another train, and the rest of the assembly was in various stages of disbelief, except for Ronon. He was rubbing his forehead as if he were developing a headache.
"John?" Art asked incredulously while his wife's face fell. Staring at his son, he demanded, "What the hell did you do?"
"Nothing," Rodney hurried to assure them, "he did nothing, it, it was me." He took another deep breath. "Uh, Marshal, are you feeling all right?"
The old man beamed at him and took a picture. Right. Wouldn't want anyone to forget this day. Feeling sick to his stomach, Rodney started to explain. "Uh. Do you remember when we met at the hospital. Never mind, of course you do. I, uh, I had saved Elizabeth from the tracks, but the doctors wouldn't let me see her, and someone," he didn't look at Cadman, "kind of got the impression I was Elizabeth's fiancé." Another deep breath. "Which was wrong. I was never engaged to Elizabeth."
There, he'd said it. But now, with everyone staring at him like he'd betrayed them - and of course, he had - there was no trace of relief, only guilt and regret and the hollow feeling of disappointing someone you cared about. Gathering all his courage, Rodney raised his eyes to look at John. The other man's face was pained as he asked quietly, "Why didn't you say something?"
"I didn't know how," Rodney admitted, and now his eyes were burning. He'd screwed up. He'd screwed up what could have been one of the best things in his life because he'd been a coward, and now he had to face the consequences. If only it wouldn't hurt so much. "You all… you accepted me so readily, and I… I've never been part of a family before, but there you were, treating me like I was a part of yours, and I, I loved that. I loved all of you, I… I didn't know how to let that go. I'm sorry." He looked down so he wouldn't have to meet anyone's gaze, so he wouldn't have to see John's expression. "I'm sorry," he repeated quietly, wiped a hand across his running nose and slowly made his way away from the altar back along the aisle.
He hadn't gone very far when a vaguely familiar dark-skinned man stormed into the chapel.
"I object to this wedding," he boomed, "Elizabeth is engaged to me!"
"And I object to your objection!" a pretty Asian woman who was barely two steps behind him yelled.
"Who's that?" Aiden wanted to know.
Elizabeth shrugged. "Norman's wife."
"You're engaged to a married man?"
"Hey, my brother used my coma to hit on my… boyfriend, sort of."
Rodney used the ensuing chaos to quietly slip away, waving a silent goodbye to Radek. The Czech offered him a slight smile, and that was the last glimpse Rodney had of the Sheppard family.
~~~
A few hours later, Rodney was un-decorating the Christmas tree. It seemed fitting somehow to do that on the day his bubble of lies had finally burst - after all, the whole mess had kind of started on the day he'd bought it. Tonight he'd get rid of the tree, and tomorrow he'd hand Ronon his notice. Pack up his stuff, move somewhere else, start over. Perhaps even get a better job, one that actually demanded his qualifications. And live out his life in blessed boredom, far away from Chicago and its wind and excitement and stupidly trusting families and far too attractive men with messy hair.
Yes, he was running away. But then he'd probably be the first to admit that he was a coward.
The knock came so unexpected it startled him. Who could be possibly wanting to talk to him on this hellish day? He was reasonably certain he'd already ticked off everyone he knew.
It was Steve Jr. "Hey, Rod. I, uh, just wanted to say I'm sorry you didn't get the guy. You know, with the leaning."
Rodney's slight smile fell at the reminder. Steve Jr. must have noticed, because he hurried to continue, "I mean, I'm sure you can work it out, maybe hypnotherapy or something like that. Just… don't start eating chocolate and stuff, because you'll just get fat. You, uh, you don't deserve that."
For Kavanagh, that was almost sweet, so Rodney allowed himself to be hugged. He wasn't even groped this time, which probably had to do with Steve Jr.'s new girlfriend.
"So. How are things going with you and the hottest chick on the block?"
To Rodney's horrified amazement, Kavanagh burst into tears. "She's… I… she's…"
Crooning softly, thanking the heavens that soon he'd be leaving this nuthouse behind, Rodney led the sobbing man into his apartment. Nobody should be alone with their misery tonight. "Come on, Steve. I'm sure she didn't deserve you anyway."
"Right." Kavanagh sniffed wetly. "Do you have any chocolate?"
"Sorry. But if you want, you can smell at my laundry."
"Okay."
~~~
His last day at work was incredibly slow. Rodney was lost in glum thoughts, trying to keep his mind on pressing the button instead of drifting back to memories of Elizabeth. Those led inevitable to John, and he was trying his best to forget that particular disaster. And he was doing well, he really was. Already the painful tug at his insides whenever he came across the name was gone - or, well, almost - and he didn't even think about him that much anymore. Barely remembered the way John's hazel eyes had lit up when he'd talked about his model planes, how silky-soft his messy hair had felt sliding through Rodney's fingers, how hot his skin had been, that strange grin that lifted one side of his mouth at a time, his voice, his hands, that stupid jacket that didn't warm at all-
No, Rodney very definitely didn't miss John Sheppard. In the slightest.
"I am sorry that you are leaving us, Rodney." Teyla had already cleared up her side of the booth, her shift having ended three minutes ago. "Working with you has been surprisingly pleasant.
"Yeah, same here," Rodney mumbled. He'd really liked her quiet competence; at least she hadn't chattered continuously like some of the other employees. She smiled at him and then drew him into that weird kind of hugging thing she had, her hands on his shoulders and their foreheads touching.
"I shall miss you."
"I'll write."
"Don't forget to keep that promise." Teyla smiled impishly. "Or I will have to send Ronon after you."
"The horror," Rodney muttered, grinning. Then she was gone, and he was alone in his booth, with nothing to distract him but the occasional click of train tokens landing in the little brass bowl, prompting him to press the button that unlocked the turnstile. Clack - ding. Clack - ding. Clack - ding. Ding - cla- No, wait a minute, what?
Confused, Rodney stared into the brass bowl, slowly reaching out to touch the slim silver ring that had stopped spinning and was now resting peacefully inside. Breath stuttering in his chest with hope, trepidation, something, whatever, he looked up.
The whole Sheppard family was assembled in front of his booth - well, Elizabeth was missing, but Radek was hovering in the background, grinning wildly - wearing identical expectant expressions. At the very front, wearing his stupid jacket, was John, looking even more attractive than Rodney remembered him. His eyes were almost green, bright with his small uncertain smile.
"Hey, Rodney."
Rodney looked at them, at the ring he'd pulled out of the bowl, back at John's hopeful smile. He didn't know what to say, his throat so tight no words would've come out anyway. All he could do was blink rapidly and smile back, face-splittingly wide, because this looked very much like something he hadn't dared to believe in.
"We need to talk," John said, nodding at the ring Rodney kept turning over and over in his fingers.
"Tell him you'll move to Canada." Marshal elbowed John between the ribs, his gaze fixed on Rodney.
"Shhh, let the boy ask his question," Radek admonished him, and Marshal shot back, "I am letting him ask his question, I'm just helping him."
Rodney tried very hard not to laugh, afraid that he wouldn't stop if he did, and John grinned at him like he wanted to say, 'well, what can you do?'
"Care to let me in?"
And Rodney wanted to let him in, he really did, but-
"I can't."
John's face fell.
"You need to have a train token."
John flipped a token into the brass bowl without the slightest bit of hesitation. Clack. His eyes never leaving John's face, Rodney pressed the button. Ding.
Smiling more confidently now, John walked through the turnstile and into the booth.
"Get on your knees," Aiden suggested, and they both laughed a little shakily as John sank down in front of Rodney's chair.
"Marry me?" he asked softly.
"You're not Canadian," Rodney replied just as softly, and John cocked his head.
"I could be. Marry me, Rodney."
"Yeah." Rodney was so full of happiness he felt he might burst any moment. John was leaning in to kiss him, grinning smugly, but there was something Rodney needed to say first. "I'm. I love you."
He flushed with the awareness that it was the first time he'd ever said those words. John's self-satisfied grin faded into something softer, like he knew what this meant to Rodney. Perhaps he did. "Yeah. Me too."
The rest of the family crooned happily as John closed the small space between himself and Rodney. Rodney barely heard them, too lost in the feel of John's lips soft and warm on his own, a promise of love and happily ever after. And while he generally didn't believe in that kind of stuff, he thought he could make an exception.
Just this once.
~~~
So, instead of marrying Elizabeth I ended up with John. Like Professor Hohenstein said, theories don't always work out. And that's for the best sometimes, apparently.
John and I spent our honeymoon in Florida, where besides alligators and mosquitoes and radioactive panthers there are also space-shuttles. We didn't get to fly one, obviously, but John was talking to someone and I corrected them, and that someone knew someone who had this ridiculous theory I shot down, and I started working for NASA two months later. So I guess in a way, John actually gave me the stars.
Elizabeth once asked me just why, exactly, I fell in love with John
I said, "Don't tell him - but he is perfect."
~~~
[Roll Credits]
Cast - (Not Really) In Order of Appearance
Lucy . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Rodney
Jack. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . John
Peter . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Elizabeth
Landlord . . . . . . . . . . . . Caldwell
Joe Jr. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Kavanagh (Steven Caldwell-Kavanagh)
Jerry . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Ronon Dex
Nurse . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Cadman
Ox Callahan . . . . . . . . . . Own Character (Art Sheppard)
Midge Callahan . . . . . . . Own Character (Marcy Sheppard)
Mary Callahan . . . . . . . . Aiden Ford
Elsie . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Old Col. Marshal Sumner
Saul . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Radek Zelenka
Dr. Rubin . . . . . . . . . . . . Carson Beckett
Ashley Barlett Bacon. . . (Norman) Bates
Celeste . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Teyla Emmagan
Becky . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Allina
Miss Third-Floor. . . . . . . Simpson
Peter's Lawyer-Friend . . Chaya
Black Nurse . . . . . . . . . . Peter Grodin
Peter's Roommate . . . . . Katie Brown
Ashley's Husband . . . . . Dr. Kusanagi
Hot Dog Guy . . . . . . . . . Mildred's
Callahan & Sons (Estate Furniture) - Sheppard & Consorts (Aerophiliae)
Pairing: Mckay/Sheppard
Rating: PG-13, sadly. Overall NC-17
Summary: Rodney McKay is an ordinary guy who just happens to rescue the woman he's been pining for from afar for months. Now she's in a coma and her family thinks they're engaged - except for her brother, John. And that's not the only problem, because over the course of a crazy week, Rodney finds himself falling harder than he ever has before.
Notes: Again, for the last time, fusing While You Were Sleeping and Stargate: Atlantis. I can't believe I really finished this - thanks to nightfreyja, who bribed into writing the damn ending. *laughs* This has been great fun, shameless plagiarism, and I thank everyone who kept commenting and asking for more. Really, you guys are the greatest!
Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five Part Six Part Seven
~~~
It was early afternoon when Rodney went to return Elizabeth's stuff. He'd been tempted to simply hand it over to Radek and avoid the accusing stares he knew where waiting for him, but he figured he owed Elizabeth a personal apology for the mess he'd made. He couldn't regret being part of her family for a precious few days, not really. This last week had been easily the happiest time of his life. But he could regret the way he'd gotten into that lucky position, by lying and cheating to some of the greatest people he knew, and he did. Regret that. Almost as much as he regretted the fact that it was over.
Elizabeth was dozing when he entered the room, and Rodney tried to be as quiet as possible as he walked over to the small corner table. Being willing to apologise was one thing, being able to get around it without stirring up more trouble quite another, and preferable at that.
"Rodney."
Rodney stilled, his fingers tightening painfully around the handles of the box he was carrying. Forcing yet another smile on his face, he turned to face Elizabeth's open expression.
"Elizabeth, uh. Hi."
"Hi." She stared at him, searching, and Rodney tried very hard not to squirm. She was probably trying to find out what kind of man betrayed a desperate family. He would have liked to know the answer to that himself.
"I, uh, I brought your things," he said, offering the box. Waiting for the accusations to start. Or the disappointment to show on that beautiful face. Elizabeth really was every bit as charming as he remembered. She had her brother's eyes… which was entirely irrelevant and not helpful. At all.
"Say, Rodney."
"Yes?" Here we go.
"Would you like my Jell-O?"
Huh?
"I, uh, no. No, thank you. Um. Do you, uh, can I get you anything?" What was this, some new and inventive way of torture? Why couldn't she just damn him to hell and be done with it?
"I miss ice-cream," Elizabeth sighed wistfully, still staring at him. Waiting for him to break?
"Baskin-Robbins?"
"Oh, yes."
"I, uh, like caramel," Rodney said stupidly, and she smiled.
"That's my favourite."
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Huh." They stared at each other for a year-long moment, then Elizabeth pointed at the nearby plastic chair.
"Please sit down."
Rodney did, warily, trying to avoid her wide-eyed gaze. Was it possible she still didn't know? Perhaps Radek had started with the rest of the family and they hadn't been here yet. "I, uh, I saw a picture of you. When you, uh, won the national spelling bee."
"Ah, yes. Past glory." She waved it away, embarrassed, and Rodney was enchanted by her modesty. He'd probably have a framed copy of that article hanging on his wall.
"Well, I guess we don't get to do that many great things when we grow up."
"Oh, but you did!"
"Oh, please. Jumping in front of a train isn't great, it's stupid. Uh, no offence."
"None taken." Elizabeth finally stopped staring at him to gaze pensively at the far wall. "I don't think I've ever done anything truly selfless. I mean, yes, I helped reunite Germany, but that's my job."
"Well, a lot of people do their jobs without putting in an effort, so that's got to count for something. And, uh, I've seen you give up your seat in the train, several times. That's pretty selfless."
"But hardly great."
"It is for the person who gets to sit down." Rodney paused, trying to find a way to cheer her up. He thought back to the day he first saw her, and to every morning since. "And I looked forward to your smile every morning. That did have a certain greatness."
Elizabeth was staring again, this time with a slight frown. "You know, I think I do remember you." She smiled. "Isn't that great?"
Rodney smiled back, knowing he was just digging his own grave a little deeper and not caring in the face of that lovely smile. So he'd keep pretending for a little while, no problem. He had developed a routine by now.
He was a sick and depraved person.
~~~
Back in Elizabeth's apartment building, a dark-skinned man strode confidently through the door and walked to the elevator with quick, sure steps.
"Excuse me!" The doorman hurried to follow him. "Sir, excuse me!"
The man stopped and turned around, his impatience clear in his posture. "What?"
"Sir, I'm sorry, but I have to sign you in."
The man eyed the poor doorman up and down. "You're new."
"Uh, yes, sir." The doorman looked apologetic. "What apartment?"
"Elizabeth Weir's apartment. 57G."
"Thank you, sir. And your name, please?"
"Norman Bates. I'm Dr. Weir's fiancé."
The doorman chuckled at that. "Pardon, sir, but you're not."
Norman stared at him in incredulity. "What?"
~~~
"Hey. You're looking great."
"Thank you, John." Elizabeth gave her brother a smile as the nurse helped her sit down in a wheelchair.
"What's that for?" he asked, pointing at it.
"Oh, they're moving me to the second floor. Apparently I'm well enough to share a room."
"Cool. You'll get to charm new people." John grinned at her, then motioned at the nurse. "Hey, can I drive that thing?"
"Sure," the guy said, stepping back from both wheelchair and hospital regulations. "I'll meet you at the elevators."
"All right." John grabbed the handles, and off they went. It was a cool wheelchair, with a little IV stand attached, and he noticed that it could be folded up when it wasn't used. Elizabeth complained about the cold hospital air as they made their way to the elevators - and true, her red silk bathrobe looked pretty but not very warm. And she was about to get even colder. "Here. I smuggled something in for you."
Elizabeth gave a delighted little squeak as John pulled the container of Baskin-Robbins from under his jacket. "Ohhh, caramel, thank you!"
"Only the best for my big sister. Here you go." John handed her the spoon and she dug in, once again making him wonder how a person with her eating habits could stay that thin.
"Oh, say, have you met Rodney?" she asked around a mouthful of ice-cream. At his nod, she smiled. "He's terrific, isn't he?"
"Yeah, he is." He was, with his crooked smile and honest blue eyes and soft skin and don't go there, John. He wasn't jealous of his sister. She was happy, Rodney was happy, everybody was happy. John would get a terrific brother-in-law. That was… that was cool. That was… terrific.
Elizabeth was waxing poetic about the joys of ice-cream when they reached the elevators. "It tastes better than I remembered. Everything is better, looks better, feels better - even this caramel ice-cream."
"That's nice. It's vanilla, by the way."
"Oh?" They stopped and waited for the nurse to arrive. "I don't care. I'm a new person, John. I'm getting a second chance. Forget about the past, I'm a new Elizabeth."
"Well, that's nice to hear." John started to pace. He really hoped the nurse would show up before this turned into something mushy.
"You know, I don't even know what my secretary got you for Christmas," Elizabeth admitted, a thoughtful look on her face. Great. Now they were confessing stuff. Hey, while we're at it, I slept with your boyfriend.
"It was a sweater. A very nice one. Hey, speaking of sweaters, did you-"
"I betrayed my husband." Oh, God.
"You know, I think I'd better-" John pointed down the hall, already turning away from her guilty face.
"Remember the spelling bee?"
He turned back. "I don't want to know this, do I."
"I knew the words. Mrs. Mal Doran told them to me so she'd look good as a teacher."
John couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Elizabeth! You cheated?" She nodded glumly, and John just had to ask. "Does Rodney know about this?"
"No! I'm the new Elizabeth with Rodney. He is…" Elizabeth paused, looking for the right words to describe her fiancé. "He is, what is he…"
"He's one of the most open people you'll ever meet," John said, thinking of the way Rodney's feelings were always right there on his face. "He drives you crazy with his arrogance and is still so vulnerable that you never want to hurt him." He ran a shaky hand through his hair, remembering how Rodney had touched him, clumsy and awed and like John was worth something. Everything. "He'll probably kill someone to get into a space shuttle, no matter if it's American or Russian or Japanese, and I don't know if that's scary or just…" and he had to smile, "kind of cute."
Elizabeth nodded contemplatively, then she frowned. "No, I don't think that's it."
John felt like he'd been hit. Of course Elizabeth's relationship to Rodney would be different, how could it not be? She probably got to see sides of him John never would, and that was okay, really. Except…
Except it wasn't. Except he wanted what she had, for the first time in his life. And he didn't know what to do about it.
"But I'm sure there's something special about him," Elizabeth continued blithely, "and I'll have the rest of my life to figure out what it is."
Disgusted with her luck and his own envy, John left her sitting in front of the elevators, talking with herself. He had to get that man out of his system. Fast.
~~~
Radek was smiling when Rodney met him in front of the hospital, so he took that to mean that the deed was done. He felt… relieved, kind of. Awful and guilty and afraid of what might happen next, but also relieved. "What did they say?"
"Who?" Radek wanted to know.
"The, the Sheppards." Rodney glanced over to the hospital doors. "Are they inside? Did they yell? What did they say?"
"Ah. No, you just missed them." Radek pushed his glasses up his nose and Rodney could have cheerfully strangled him.
"Well that's nice, so I guess my untimely demise has been rescheduled for another day. For God's sake, Radek, what did they say?"
"Nothing. I did not tell them yet."
"What? Radek, you said you were going to take care of it!"
"I am taking take of it."
"Like hell you are, all you're doing is drawing it out! What the hell did I ever do to you?"
"Rodney, would you please calm down?"
"No! No I'm not going to calm down, this is, this is my life we're talking about, and you said you'd help me!"
"I am!"
Rodney stared at the other man until Radek started to fidget. "No, you know what? If this is your idea of help, you're fired."
Radek blinked. "I'm… fired, what?" But Rodney didn't pay any more attention to him. This would end, right now. He turned around to walk into the hospital, almost running into a dark-skinned man who was also on his way inside. "Pardon."
"Excuse me," the guy said, and they ended up in the elevator together.
"Fourth floor, please," Rodney told the elderly woman next to the floor buttons, so nervous he barely heard the dark-skinned man say, "Second, please."
They were going to kill him. But he'd rather confess to Elizabeth than look into John's accusing eyes. He knew he'd never really had a chance with either of them, but if he had to choose, he knew which one of the siblings he wanted to grow old with.
Too bad that was never going to happen.
~~~
Norman strode down the hospital corridor, fuming. While he was heroically doing his duty protecting the oil fields in Iraq, not only did Elizabeth find herself some new guy, no, she even had the gall to get engaged! Before he'd even asked her! He'd known she was a difficult woman, but this was unacceptable.
Some nurse was changing Elizabeth's IV when Norman entered the room. Another woman, a petite thing with reddish-blonde hair, was sitting in the bed by the window, reading. Elizabeth looked up when she heard the door and smiled at Norman.
"Norman!"
"Elizabeth." Something in his expression must have told the nurse that this was going to be a private conversation, for the man hurried to finish fixing the IV and quickly left the room. Too bad the blonde by the window couldn't get lost as easily. "I hear you're engaged?"
"Yes." She beamed, and a vein in Norman's temple started to throb.
"May I remind you that you were going to marry me?"
Elizabeth looked at him, apparently puzzled. "You broke up with me, remember? When I said the war in Iraq was foolish and dangerous?"
"We did not break up, I agreed to give you some space to think. I didn't realise that meant you were going to burn all bridges and marry the first loser you met."
Elizabeth shook her head. "Rodney is no loser."
"Rodney?" Even the name sounded pathetic. "'Rodney' who?" Norman demanded, ignoring window girl who had apparently decided that they were more entertaining than whatever crap she was reading, judging from the wide-eyed way she was watching them.
"I don't know." Elizabeth shrugged, smiling again. "I have amnesia."
"Amnesia," Norman repeated slowly, and window girl's head bobbed along with Elizabeth's empathetic nod. "Are you fucking with me?"
"No."
All right, fine. If that was the way she wanted to play it: "I want the cat back."
"Sure. But then I want my stuff back, too."
"Your stuff?" Norman laughed. "Like what?"
"Your dick." Elizabeth nodded in the general direction of his privates, and Norman barely resisted the urge to cup them protectively as he felt himself blanch.
"What, are you crazy? You can't have my dick!"
"Well, I don't want to be unreasonable about this. I'd be satisfied with the three inches I paid for."
Window girl's eyes were bulging as she stared at Norman's groin. Disgusted with women in general, he straightened and snapped, "Fine, keep the damn cat, be happy with your wimp. See if he likes to play with one nipple!" With those parting words, Norman strode out of the room, his gut churning with humiliation. To think he'd wanted to marry that… that bitch! Taking away his dick - the nerve! Scowling, Norman stepped into the elevator, waiting until the doors had closed before he readjusted himself.
Just checking.
~~~
Katie Brown stared open-mouthed after the retreating soldier. "Wow, Elizabeth. On to raise your flag on the next pole, huh?"
Elizabeth smiled smugly and said nothing.
~~~
"Rodney!" Laura Cadman's voice made Rodney turn around with something akin to gratitude. Elizabeth's room was empty, her things packed and gone, and the stupid blonde at the nurses' station wouldn't tell him if she'd been discharged. Certainly Cadman would- "They moved her."
Bingo. Wait. "They moved her? Why?"
"Because she's no longer a case for the ICU?" Cadman's voice clearly implied the 'duh'. "Come on, I'll take you."
Not even two minutes later, Cadman was dragging him down a corridor and then pushing him through a door. "And there you go."
"Rodney, hi." Elizabeth's expression brightened when she spotted him. She looked gorgeous in her red silk bathrobe, and her cheeks bore a little more colour. Rodney felt his own cheeks flush as he remembered that he had no business even talking to her.
"Elizabeth, you look, uh, you look good. Really good," he told her inanely, cursing himself for delaying the inevitable yet again. He should just tell her and leave, no doubt with her curses following him down the corridor.
"I feel good," she answered brightly, and he nodded.
"Good, that's good, uh, listen-"
"Rodney, I've been thinking. About my life and what has gone wrong in it. I've seen a woman with influence, money, and power. A woman who owns a ranch in Texas as well as banana plantations in Esna."
"Esna?" Rodney asked, confused, and the pretty redhead from the next bed over smiled dreamily: "Egypt."
"I've also seen a woman who is alone," Elizabeth carried on before Rodney could inject anything about how she shouldn't waste her breath on a liar, "who needs a man by her side when she feels lonely, who will stand by her and raise her children."
"I-" What? Children? Was she on medication? Rodney opened his mouth once again to tell her, to tell her, but she wouldn't let him.
"I want you to be that man, Rodney. You saved my life. You gave me a second chance at living. I want to live that life with you."
Rodney felt the blood fall from his face as he swayed on his feet. She couldn't be serious. This was… this was handing him his dreams from a week ago on a plate, surely she couldn't mean what he thought she meant? And even if she did, he couldn't possibly accept it, could he?
"Meredith Rodney McKay. Will you marry me?"
Oh God.
~~~
Steve Jr. was walking down the stairs arm in arm with a cute blonde when John opened the door to Rodney's apartment building. "Hey, uh, Sheppard." John raised his eyebrow at the man's use of his name, but then remembered that it was in capital letters on the truck. "You gonna visit Rodney?"
"Yeah." John smiled and tried to pass the man, but Steve Jr. heartily thumped his shoulder.
"Good choice. He's the hottest guy in this building."
"Hey!" the blonde exclaimed and swatted Kavanagh's arm.
"Oh, uh, you. You're the hottest chick on the block," Kavanagh said lamely, and John had to suppress a snort. The blonde beamed, though, giving Kavanagh a playful slap.
"Aww, Kavanagh!"
"Come on, Simpson. Hot wings are waiting for no man."
"Have fun," John called after them and walked the final steps to Rodney's door, playing with the wedding present in his pocket. A few more days, and Rodney would marry Elizabeth. John knew he should be happy for them. Hell, he was happy for them, in a way. Still he couldn't help feeling a niggling regret when he thought about the easy banter that had been flowing between him and Rodney, about the way they had just seemed to fit together. Not just physically. But Rodney was taken, had been taken from the start, and it had been stupid to pretend otherwise. No matter how much John wanted, Rodney wasn't for him.
He cleared his throat as he knocked, his forced smile widening at the thumps from inside. Rodney's muffled voice from the other side of the door stated very clearly what he thought about the interruption, although his words didn't seem to make much sense: "I don't want to go to the next physics symposium, I'm not wearing my charcoal grey boxers, and I sure as hell won't have sex with-"
The door was yanked open, Rodney's expression one of comical surprise as he finished weakly, "you."
"Well, I don't have much interest in physics anyways," John drawled, one eyebrow raised, "I certainly wouldn't mind seeing your charcoal grey boxers, and I think we already agreed that sex would be a bad idea."
"Yeah," Rodney said faintly, a slight flush creeping up his cheeks. "I, uh, thought you were Kavanagh."
"It's the hair, isn't it?" John deadpanned, and Rodney was startled into a laugh before he opened the door a little further and took a step back.
"Do you want to come in?"
No, see, because that's another really bad idea. "Sure, why not?"
"Sure."
Walking into the cluttered apartment was like walking into a memory. That was where John had dropped his torn pants, that was the door to the bedroom where they'd kissed, that was where-
John cleared his throat, again, nodding at Rodney's formal clothes. "That your wedding gown?"
Rodney looked down his tuxedo. "Yes, I was thinking of virginal white, but then I figured that black is the new, uh, black."
They both avoided one another's eyes, and John would bet his father's business that Rodney's thoughts had taken the same direction as his own at the word 'virginal'. The living room suddenly seemed too small for the two of them, never mind the cat on the sofa. John fumbled for the present in his pocket and hurriedly pressed it into Rodney's hand.
"Here. Uh. I thought I'd go first, make the present more memorable."
"Thank you."
Rodney seemed grateful for the distraction as he took the shapeless lump of brown wrapping paper and started to open it.
"It's… I was buying up some stuff for Dad," John said, suddenly wishing he'd never come here, "and there was…"
"Hmm?" Rodney made an inquiring little sound, but then the last of the paper came loose and he stilled, staring at the model in his hands. "A space shuttle."
"Yeah." It was stupid, mushy, and still John's heart beat faster at the look of quiet awe on Rodney's face, like this was the first time someone had ever went to the trouble to pick out an individual present for him. Thinking back on what little Rodney had told about his family, maybe it was.
"Thank you. This is… certainly memorable." Rodney's voice was thick, his eyes impossibly blue in the dim light of his apartment as he looked up. John wanted to kiss him. He took a few steps back to get himself out of temptation's reach.
"I also wanted to say that Elizabeth is one very lucky girl. I know you two will make each other very happy."
"I- thank you." Rodney swallowed and smiled. "I expect we'll be seeing each other frequently, after the marriage."
"Yeah." John couldn't breathe, his eyes burning from the same thing that was constricting his chest. He had to get away from that smile, before he did something they'd all regret. "I think I better-"
He waved in the general direction of the door and didn't even wait for Rodney's answer before he turned around and very much fled from the smothering emotions that hovered in the too-small apartment. He was halfway down the stairs when Rodney called after him.
"Wait! John?"
John stopped and turned, hands clenching at his side. He met Rodney's uncertain gaze with an easy smile, looking up at his designated brother-in-law. "Yeah?"
"I, uh." Rodney straightened, his expression determined and frightened at the same time. "Is there anything… anything that would prevent me from marrying Elizabeth?"
Yeah. I think I've fallen in love with you, John thought and hated himself for it. He'd messed things up so badly between them already. Even now, Rodney was thinking of all the doubts and accusations John had heaped upon him. No wonder he was feeling insecure. "No," John said firmly with a reassuring smile. "There's nothing."
Rodney hesitated, then he nodded, still looking unhappy. John gave him a last little smile, then he turned and walked away. He needed to drive the truck back to his parents', maybe have a late dinner. And then he needed to get really, really drunk.
~~~
"Here."
"Whassat?"
Rodney shrugged and made his way to the door to Ronon's office, hoping he could get away before-
"McKay."
"What?" Rodney asked, a single step away from freedom.
"A wedding invitation."
"So?"
"So… which one?
"If you'd just-" Rodney stomped back to Ronon's desk and jabbed his finger at the name on the invitation. "There! Elizabeth Weir."
"The coma chick?" Ronon grunted in surprise. "McKay, are you nuts?"
"Oh, sure, because why would I want to marry a gorgeous woman who's obscenely rich and has promised to pull some strings and get me a job at NASA, when I could instead be sitting happily in my tiny booth and spend yet another holiday pushing a stupid button because the only one who misses me at home is my cat!" Rodney exploded. "Yes, clearly I am nuts!"
Ronon had watched the outbreak completely unfazed and was leaning back in his enormous chair, cocking his head at Rodney. "Thought you wanted the brother."
Just like that, Rodney deflated, remembering how John had walked down those stairs. Yeah. He'd wanted the brother, only... he just... "He didn't want me." Under Ronon's sympathetic look, Rodney managed a tiny smile. "Elizabeth does, though." And that was more than he'd ever hoped for.
"You're not gonna be happy, McKay," Ronon said surprisingly softly.
"No, I'm not." Rodney raised his chin and met the larger man's gaze. "But I'll be close."
And close had to count.
~~~
It didn't count, however, if you were only close to punctual on your own wedding day. Rodney had battled doubts and second thoughts nearly the whole night and promptly overslept. Now he was almost as tired as he felt sick, and wasn't this supposed to be a happy day? Because if anything was seriously lacking, it was happiness. Even a slight elation would have been nice, but no. Not a trace of anything remotely smile-inducing. If that wasn't completely wrong, Rodney didn't know what was.
Elizabeth was already waiting when Rodney finally rushed into the chapel, an IV stand at her side, looking slightly impatient. Bad form, McKay. John was standing next to her, their best man, and Rodney felt the lump in his throat tighten a little further at the soft smile the other man was giving him. Everything inside him screamed wrong, wrong, wrong! and yet he was walking down the aisle, trying to smile and failing if Radek's grimace was anything to go by. Everyone was there, the Sheppards, Ronon, Teyla, even Cadman and Elizabeth's shy roommate. Everyone was looking at him, especially the priest, who was grinning happily. He probably loved marrying people.
Oh God, he was going to get married!
Rodney stopped in front of the altar and turned to his bride - his bride! - feeling very close to hyperventilating. Over Elizabeth's shoulder, behind the IV stand, he could see John.
"Dearly beloved," the priest started, "we are gathered here today to-"
"I object," Rodney blurted. Moments later he flushed, not believing he'd really said that. A murmur went through the room, but Rodney's attention was solely on John, who was looking at him with a searching expression.
"Excuse me, but we didn't get to that part yet," the priest stammered, but John nodded.
"I kind of object, too."
Rodney's pulse was racing; he felt hot and cold at the same time. This was far worse than any thesis defence ever could have been. Why was John objecting? Was it possible that-
"Hey, what the hell is going on here?" Art wanted to know, ignoring the priest's reproachful look. Rodney took a deep breath. So this was it.
"I, I'm in love with your son," he explained with a slight stutter, and Art nodded indulgently.
"You mean my daughter."
"No." Rodney's voice cracked. "I… I mean your son."
He barely dared to look at John, who was wearing a slight smile, blinking fast. Elizabeth looked like she'd been hit by another train, and the rest of the assembly was in various stages of disbelief, except for Ronon. He was rubbing his forehead as if he were developing a headache.
"John?" Art asked incredulously while his wife's face fell. Staring at his son, he demanded, "What the hell did you do?"
"Nothing," Rodney hurried to assure them, "he did nothing, it, it was me." He took another deep breath. "Uh, Marshal, are you feeling all right?"
The old man beamed at him and took a picture. Right. Wouldn't want anyone to forget this day. Feeling sick to his stomach, Rodney started to explain. "Uh. Do you remember when we met at the hospital. Never mind, of course you do. I, uh, I had saved Elizabeth from the tracks, but the doctors wouldn't let me see her, and someone," he didn't look at Cadman, "kind of got the impression I was Elizabeth's fiancé." Another deep breath. "Which was wrong. I was never engaged to Elizabeth."
There, he'd said it. But now, with everyone staring at him like he'd betrayed them - and of course, he had - there was no trace of relief, only guilt and regret and the hollow feeling of disappointing someone you cared about. Gathering all his courage, Rodney raised his eyes to look at John. The other man's face was pained as he asked quietly, "Why didn't you say something?"
"I didn't know how," Rodney admitted, and now his eyes were burning. He'd screwed up. He'd screwed up what could have been one of the best things in his life because he'd been a coward, and now he had to face the consequences. If only it wouldn't hurt so much. "You all… you accepted me so readily, and I… I've never been part of a family before, but there you were, treating me like I was a part of yours, and I, I loved that. I loved all of you, I… I didn't know how to let that go. I'm sorry." He looked down so he wouldn't have to meet anyone's gaze, so he wouldn't have to see John's expression. "I'm sorry," he repeated quietly, wiped a hand across his running nose and slowly made his way away from the altar back along the aisle.
He hadn't gone very far when a vaguely familiar dark-skinned man stormed into the chapel.
"I object to this wedding," he boomed, "Elizabeth is engaged to me!"
"And I object to your objection!" a pretty Asian woman who was barely two steps behind him yelled.
"Who's that?" Aiden wanted to know.
Elizabeth shrugged. "Norman's wife."
"You're engaged to a married man?"
"Hey, my brother used my coma to hit on my… boyfriend, sort of."
Rodney used the ensuing chaos to quietly slip away, waving a silent goodbye to Radek. The Czech offered him a slight smile, and that was the last glimpse Rodney had of the Sheppard family.
~~~
A few hours later, Rodney was un-decorating the Christmas tree. It seemed fitting somehow to do that on the day his bubble of lies had finally burst - after all, the whole mess had kind of started on the day he'd bought it. Tonight he'd get rid of the tree, and tomorrow he'd hand Ronon his notice. Pack up his stuff, move somewhere else, start over. Perhaps even get a better job, one that actually demanded his qualifications. And live out his life in blessed boredom, far away from Chicago and its wind and excitement and stupidly trusting families and far too attractive men with messy hair.
Yes, he was running away. But then he'd probably be the first to admit that he was a coward.
The knock came so unexpected it startled him. Who could be possibly wanting to talk to him on this hellish day? He was reasonably certain he'd already ticked off everyone he knew.
It was Steve Jr. "Hey, Rod. I, uh, just wanted to say I'm sorry you didn't get the guy. You know, with the leaning."
Rodney's slight smile fell at the reminder. Steve Jr. must have noticed, because he hurried to continue, "I mean, I'm sure you can work it out, maybe hypnotherapy or something like that. Just… don't start eating chocolate and stuff, because you'll just get fat. You, uh, you don't deserve that."
For Kavanagh, that was almost sweet, so Rodney allowed himself to be hugged. He wasn't even groped this time, which probably had to do with Steve Jr.'s new girlfriend.
"So. How are things going with you and the hottest chick on the block?"
To Rodney's horrified amazement, Kavanagh burst into tears. "She's… I… she's…"
Crooning softly, thanking the heavens that soon he'd be leaving this nuthouse behind, Rodney led the sobbing man into his apartment. Nobody should be alone with their misery tonight. "Come on, Steve. I'm sure she didn't deserve you anyway."
"Right." Kavanagh sniffed wetly. "Do you have any chocolate?"
"Sorry. But if you want, you can smell at my laundry."
"Okay."
~~~
His last day at work was incredibly slow. Rodney was lost in glum thoughts, trying to keep his mind on pressing the button instead of drifting back to memories of Elizabeth. Those led inevitable to John, and he was trying his best to forget that particular disaster. And he was doing well, he really was. Already the painful tug at his insides whenever he came across the name was gone - or, well, almost - and he didn't even think about him that much anymore. Barely remembered the way John's hazel eyes had lit up when he'd talked about his model planes, how silky-soft his messy hair had felt sliding through Rodney's fingers, how hot his skin had been, that strange grin that lifted one side of his mouth at a time, his voice, his hands, that stupid jacket that didn't warm at all-
No, Rodney very definitely didn't miss John Sheppard. In the slightest.
"I am sorry that you are leaving us, Rodney." Teyla had already cleared up her side of the booth, her shift having ended three minutes ago. "Working with you has been surprisingly pleasant.
"Yeah, same here," Rodney mumbled. He'd really liked her quiet competence; at least she hadn't chattered continuously like some of the other employees. She smiled at him and then drew him into that weird kind of hugging thing she had, her hands on his shoulders and their foreheads touching.
"I shall miss you."
"I'll write."
"Don't forget to keep that promise." Teyla smiled impishly. "Or I will have to send Ronon after you."
"The horror," Rodney muttered, grinning. Then she was gone, and he was alone in his booth, with nothing to distract him but the occasional click of train tokens landing in the little brass bowl, prompting him to press the button that unlocked the turnstile. Clack - ding. Clack - ding. Clack - ding. Ding - cla- No, wait a minute, what?
Confused, Rodney stared into the brass bowl, slowly reaching out to touch the slim silver ring that had stopped spinning and was now resting peacefully inside. Breath stuttering in his chest with hope, trepidation, something, whatever, he looked up.
The whole Sheppard family was assembled in front of his booth - well, Elizabeth was missing, but Radek was hovering in the background, grinning wildly - wearing identical expectant expressions. At the very front, wearing his stupid jacket, was John, looking even more attractive than Rodney remembered him. His eyes were almost green, bright with his small uncertain smile.
"Hey, Rodney."
Rodney looked at them, at the ring he'd pulled out of the bowl, back at John's hopeful smile. He didn't know what to say, his throat so tight no words would've come out anyway. All he could do was blink rapidly and smile back, face-splittingly wide, because this looked very much like something he hadn't dared to believe in.
"We need to talk," John said, nodding at the ring Rodney kept turning over and over in his fingers.
"Tell him you'll move to Canada." Marshal elbowed John between the ribs, his gaze fixed on Rodney.
"Shhh, let the boy ask his question," Radek admonished him, and Marshal shot back, "I am letting him ask his question, I'm just helping him."
Rodney tried very hard not to laugh, afraid that he wouldn't stop if he did, and John grinned at him like he wanted to say, 'well, what can you do?'
"Care to let me in?"
And Rodney wanted to let him in, he really did, but-
"I can't."
John's face fell.
"You need to have a train token."
John flipped a token into the brass bowl without the slightest bit of hesitation. Clack. His eyes never leaving John's face, Rodney pressed the button. Ding.
Smiling more confidently now, John walked through the turnstile and into the booth.
"Get on your knees," Aiden suggested, and they both laughed a little shakily as John sank down in front of Rodney's chair.
"Marry me?" he asked softly.
"You're not Canadian," Rodney replied just as softly, and John cocked his head.
"I could be. Marry me, Rodney."
"Yeah." Rodney was so full of happiness he felt he might burst any moment. John was leaning in to kiss him, grinning smugly, but there was something Rodney needed to say first. "I'm. I love you."
He flushed with the awareness that it was the first time he'd ever said those words. John's self-satisfied grin faded into something softer, like he knew what this meant to Rodney. Perhaps he did. "Yeah. Me too."
The rest of the family crooned happily as John closed the small space between himself and Rodney. Rodney barely heard them, too lost in the feel of John's lips soft and warm on his own, a promise of love and happily ever after. And while he generally didn't believe in that kind of stuff, he thought he could make an exception.
Just this once.
~~~
So, instead of marrying Elizabeth I ended up with John. Like Professor Hohenstein said, theories don't always work out. And that's for the best sometimes, apparently.
John and I spent our honeymoon in Florida, where besides alligators and mosquitoes and radioactive panthers there are also space-shuttles. We didn't get to fly one, obviously, but John was talking to someone and I corrected them, and that someone knew someone who had this ridiculous theory I shot down, and I started working for NASA two months later. So I guess in a way, John actually gave me the stars.
Elizabeth once asked me just why, exactly, I fell in love with John
I said, "Don't tell him - but he is perfect."
~~~
[Roll Credits]
Cast - (Not Really) In Order of Appearance
Lucy . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Rodney
Jack. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . John
Peter . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Elizabeth
Landlord . . . . . . . . . . . . Caldwell
Joe Jr. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Kavanagh (Steven Caldwell-Kavanagh)
Jerry . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Ronon Dex
Nurse . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Cadman
Ox Callahan . . . . . . . . . . Own Character (Art Sheppard)
Midge Callahan . . . . . . . Own Character (Marcy Sheppard)
Mary Callahan . . . . . . . . Aiden Ford
Elsie . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Old Col. Marshal Sumner
Saul . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Radek Zelenka
Dr. Rubin . . . . . . . . . . . . Carson Beckett
Ashley Barlett Bacon. . . (Norman) Bates
Celeste . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Teyla Emmagan
Becky . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Allina
Miss Third-Floor. . . . . . . Simpson
Peter's Lawyer-Friend . . Chaya
Black Nurse . . . . . . . . . . Peter Grodin
Peter's Roommate . . . . . Katie Brown
Ashley's Husband . . . . . Dr. Kusanagi
Hot Dog Guy . . . . . . . . . Mildred's
Callahan & Sons (Estate Furniture) - Sheppard & Consorts (Aerophiliae)