(no subject)

[laurxcore]

i feel so lost today, and yesterday..and the day before. I feel like dave was my guidence. Its corny i know, but im so cold and distant without him here. I think we are meant to be together, just not right now. Its going to take some readjustment, but thats what life is about right? Im 19, i know the whole shpeel on living life, and no regrets, and living like youll die tomorrow but i felt so happy and enlightened around him. I felt like i was living life to the fullest, and enjoying it greatly with him. I guess our fighting sort of outweighed it though. It hurts to know that we cant be together right now, even tomorrow or the day after. Im going to be strong, and im going to take this in an adult old fashioned manor. Im going to give him his space, and i know hes going to give me mine.. its going to be one hell of a ride but if were right, and meant..well both come back feeling the same. I wish he knew that i had nothing to hide, i wish he knew that i could and would never hurt him..i wish i could be trusted more. Dont ya ever just want to put youre brain onto someone elses neck just so they could know the truth..because words dont work nowadays. I hate knowing that im not trusted, when in reality i can be, and i am. I hate being thought of somthing that im not..i just wish he knew this..and i wish he felt it. im just depressed, and lonely. As much as i miss him ive got to suck it up and be the strong woman everyone thinks i am.
or am i?

i just want everything back to the good days.