MOM here
Hello. I am MOM. I am Lauren's other personality. Unlike her Skitzo side, I am neat, well organized, and use punctuation. Many people simply adore me and adorn their math homework with "I love MOM!" and "MOM is the best!". Not surprising. I am great, anyway. Well seeing as I rarely get out I'd figure I'd tell you a bit about myself. My name is MOM, I'm 42 years old, I like batmanton, chess, and yelling random phrases. My favorite foods include pizza, sprouts, and paper. My favorite movies are Gone With The Wind, Saving Private Ryan, and The Moron's Guide To Chewing Food. People describe me as playful, stuck-up, and just plain weird. I am a strong antidisastablishmentarianismist. I don't know what that is though. Strange because I married a dictionary and have three children named Felicity, Timothy, and Box. They are quite squate and a bit on the chunkular side, but no matter. I simply love tea, especially the black kind. It makes me all tingly inside. I must go paint my toenails black now in remembrance of fallen caterpillars. Toodles!
MOM