(no subject)
Once upon a time there was a girl named Lauren…
She thought it would be a good idea to both ride camels in the Sahara and ski in the Alps all in just ONE week. She was obviously wrong and after being cursed by some freaky voodoo shit on the streets of Africa she has suffered…
Violent and sporadic stomach pains
And BURGLARY
En route to said ski trip Lauren and Meghan and Megan and Dad’s rental car was broken into at a rest stop, they collectively lost…
5 cameras
3 ipods
3 cell phones
3 $$$ sunglasses
1 DVD player
22 DVDs
20 CDs
4 passports
Lauren’s wallet (containing her ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE)
and the 4 bags which once contained all of the items
Lauren is sick and she is tired and she thinks this joke is not funny, she wants her things back NOW.
Lauren apologizes for writing in the third person (but psychological studies HAVE shown extreme trauma to be a leading cause of disorders such as multiple personality syndrome and schizophrenia) and she is also sorry in advance for cross posting this fairytale all over the internet.
She thought it would be a good idea to both ride camels in the Sahara and ski in the Alps all in just ONE week. She was obviously wrong and after being cursed by some freaky voodoo shit on the streets of Africa she has suffered…
Violent and sporadic stomach pains
And BURGLARY
En route to said ski trip Lauren and Meghan and Megan and Dad’s rental car was broken into at a rest stop, they collectively lost…
5 cameras
3 ipods
3 cell phones
3 $$$ sunglasses
1 DVD player
22 DVDs
20 CDs
4 passports
Lauren’s wallet (containing her ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE)
and the 4 bags which once contained all of the items
Lauren is sick and she is tired and she thinks this joke is not funny, she wants her things back NOW.
Lauren apologizes for writing in the third person (but psychological studies HAVE shown extreme trauma to be a leading cause of disorders such as multiple personality syndrome and schizophrenia) and she is also sorry in advance for cross posting this fairytale all over the internet.