(no subject)
It's mother's day ...
It's the morning (yes) and the sun is coming up and it is most definitely the day
a day
a specific sentiment
and it just got a bit bigger than would seem appropriate
given
the limitations on time, and my limited attention
and my jewelry is just a bit heavier than I would expect
(black diamonds and pearls)
and it stands
More than anything, today
reminds me of many women
standing in place of some great intention I had lined up,
proudly,
speaking my name and place
like their own.
More than anything I wanted to belong to someone like that
like my bashful fingers intended.
Ruth and I talked tonight.
I told her,
how I think I am. How one wants to be. Outside of any man. And it does seem a shame to rely on other parts and ingredients. More than any paper.
Speaking of clothes.
I am increasingly
(more or less) transparent
as the years fall on...
I can speak more easily of the future
as my body becomes more like
my mother's ...
it's almost like I am speaking of a thought I once had when I was young, and didn't know
how my face would fall,
but how my heartwouldgrow
and grab on,
for dear life.
And how my tits would fall.
They do.
Everyone's do. Unless of course you die, and that's a whole nother story
entirely.
Once upon a time, everything we did mattered. We had black eyelids, and long lashes, and a hundred thousand dollar
senior award
commemorating all the time spent, and blowjobs given up,
in honor of the sacrifice. All the boyfriends and girlfriends who said,
"Don't worry about it. We'll get to it another time. You're beyond sexy. I want to chew on your arms, always. There is. No one else.
And in the nighttime there was no talk of the friends who had not made the point,
there were no backward glances
there was no other state,
there was nosuchthing.
It's the morning (yes) and the sun is coming up and it is most definitely the day
a day
a specific sentiment
and it just got a bit bigger than would seem appropriate
given
the limitations on time, and my limited attention
and my jewelry is just a bit heavier than I would expect
(black diamonds and pearls)
and it stands
More than anything, today
reminds me of many women
standing in place of some great intention I had lined up,
proudly,
speaking my name and place
like their own.
More than anything I wanted to belong to someone like that
like my bashful fingers intended.
Ruth and I talked tonight.
I told her,
how I think I am. How one wants to be. Outside of any man. And it does seem a shame to rely on other parts and ingredients. More than any paper.
Speaking of clothes.
I am increasingly
(more or less) transparent
as the years fall on...
I can speak more easily of the future
as my body becomes more like
my mother's ...
it's almost like I am speaking of a thought I once had when I was young, and didn't know
how my face would fall,
but how my heartwouldgrow
and grab on,
for dear life.
And how my tits would fall.
They do.
Everyone's do. Unless of course you die, and that's a whole nother story
entirely.
Once upon a time, everything we did mattered. We had black eyelids, and long lashes, and a hundred thousand dollar
senior award
commemorating all the time spent, and blowjobs given up,
in honor of the sacrifice. All the boyfriends and girlfriends who said,
"Don't worry about it. We'll get to it another time. You're beyond sexy. I want to chew on your arms, always. There is. No one else.
And in the nighttime there was no talk of the friends who had not made the point,
there were no backward glances
there was no other state,
there was nosuchthing.