(no subject)
Why is it that everyone everywhere is constantly talking about their grandmothers and/or death? Maybe I'm just crazy, but it seems like every single show on TV I've watched lately just strikes a terrible chord with me. I feel like I'm constantly on the line between okay and breaking down and crying. This is going to be the worst Christmas of my life. And to make matters worse, my grandad is going down to Atlanta for Christmas. I don't even get to spend it with him. I don't get to spend it with either of them. Oh, there's that crying reflex again.
And while I'm on the topic of Atlanta, I am still really angry at my uncle for how he treated me during the week of my grandma's funeral. I also hate (is there a stronger word? i need a stronger word) the fact that he tried to get my grandad to move down to Atlanta and live with them. I understand he had good intentions but if he had stopped just once and actually listened to what my grandad told us he wanted to do, he would've shut his fucking mouth instead. I really don't like feeling this resentful towards a family member, but good god how self-centered can you be?!
I also still can't get over the fact that my aunt had the audacity to ask me if my grandmother dying made me believe in God. Excuse me, WHAT? Why the FUCK would I want to believe in some stupid fucking imaginary person, who just took my grandmother away from my family and I? HOW FUCKING STUPID ARE YOU?
I've been holding onto these thoughts for a while now. End rant.
And while I'm on the topic of Atlanta, I am still really angry at my uncle for how he treated me during the week of my grandma's funeral. I also hate (is there a stronger word? i need a stronger word) the fact that he tried to get my grandad to move down to Atlanta and live with them. I understand he had good intentions but if he had stopped just once and actually listened to what my grandad told us he wanted to do, he would've shut his fucking mouth instead. I really don't like feeling this resentful towards a family member, but good god how self-centered can you be?!
I also still can't get over the fact that my aunt had the audacity to ask me if my grandmother dying made me believe in God. Excuse me, WHAT? Why the FUCK would I want to believe in some stupid fucking imaginary person, who just took my grandmother away from my family and I? HOW FUCKING STUPID ARE YOU?
I've been holding onto these thoughts for a while now. End rant.