(no subject)
God, my grandma was such a beautiful woman. I'm trying so much to be strong for them and not cry in front of my grandad or my mom but I feel like my hearts been broken. She was his best friend, he loved her so much. We all did. Her and I had so many plans for the future. We were going to go on another big awesome trip when I graudated Towson - to ANYWHERE I wanted to go. Anywhere. She was supposed to see me graduate, and Aidan graduate high school, and Kate start preschool. She was supposed to be at my wedding, one day. She didn't even get to completely move into her beach house - that was her dream. She would always sit on that back porch in her nightgown and robe, drinking coffee and reading the newspaper. My grandad told me how excited she was for that. God, I wish I could stop crying. I woke up this morning half-expecting her to come knocking loudly on my door like usual and start singing some made-up song about how it's a beautiful morning. Her little dog, Java, has been pacing around the house looking for her everywhere, I hate that dog but god it breaks my fucking heart. Please tell me this isn't really happening.