A Futon, A College Party, and One Really Sober Yoochun
1:37 am sees Yoochun struggling to make it to the car, as a pervert has wrapped himself snugly against him and it is making it difficult to walk.
“You are a jerk off in the face!” Yoochun cursed at the man breathing down his neck; the scent of alcohol overwhelming.
“Mmmm, sounds tasty,” he said wrapping his unwanted arms around Yoochun.
“Get off!” Yoochun tried to escape the hold but his squirms only urged the man on.
“You first.” He smirked, a lecherous glint in his eyes as his hands slinked down to grab at the smaller man’s ass.
3 hours earlier.
Changmin doesn’t dance. It just wasn’t his thing. So when he found himself at parties he stayed on the sidelines, but goddamnit if he wasn’t the best looking wallflower you’d ever seen. At this particular party, another ‘HeeTeuk’ extravaganza, he didn’t mind being on the outside of the dance floor action as he had his best friend with him. Yoochun doesn’t dance either - he isn’t allowed to. Yoochun was a fantastic artist, dynamite at karaoke, but under a strobe light the man looked like a convulsing monkey.
Junsu and Yunho were the dancers. It was one of the things that helped them bond. Junsu and Yunho were soccer rivals during their high school days and when Jaejoong started to date Junsu, Jaejoong’s best friend Yunho had been furious. Now, in college, the two men played alongside each other. They also danced together. At parties, the dance floor was dominated by SuHo.
Jaejoong danced but mostly to check-up on Junsu and Yunho. He also checks out the food and innocuous corners to see how his Yoochun and Changmin were holding up. But Jae’s favourite party activity was gossiping. This is why he loved it when Heechul and Leeteuk threw parties; those two had all the juiciest campus stories.
“Have you seen Jae anywhere?” Yoochun asked Changmin, jumping to look over the crown of people.
“Wha?” he was so hypnotized by his view of swaying hips that he was unable to reply coherently.
“Hey, unfriendly giant, can you see my boyfriend around here?” he mocked, trying to get his friend’s attention.
“Yeah, grinding up on my boyfriend.” Changmin had yet to be able to take his eyes of the two males who had an audience watching them.
“I meant the one with the tiny little girl’s waist and broad shoulders, not the one with back.” Yoochun hadn’t seen Jae since they arrived and was a bit sad. It was bad enough he lost one boyfriend to the dance floor, but now Jae was missing. What was the point of having two boyfriends if he only ever spent time with Changmin?
“I don’t know where that one is, all I know is that that dance move should be consider adultery.” That was all Changmin said before he stomped off towards the two dancing men.
In the next moment, the only thing that could be heard above the music was Park Yoochun’s gasp. Shim Changmin was dancing, but not only dancing, he was engaging in an act of PDA. He was claiming Yunho in front of Junsu everyone. Yoochun had never seen his friend act in such a lewd manner, well, when sober anyhow.
Yoochun noticed Junsu pouting, having lost his dance partner. “I’ll dance with you Junsu-ah!” He offered happily.
“NOOOO!!!!!!” the previously kissing couple shouted along with a horrified Junsu. Tears stung Yoochun’s eyes. Why doesn’t anyone ever want to dance with me?
It wasn’t Yoochun’s fault that his uncoordinated flailing was a risk to others as well as himself, but nonetheless the man was a danger under the disco ball. Junsu needed to fix this fast. “I mean, it’s not safe for you on the dance floor.” Junsu explained, wincing as the tears weld up and threatened to spill over the full cheeks.
“Come my little watermelon, let’s go find your Jaejoong,” Changmin cooed, wrapping a protective arm around his friend. Ever since they were children Changmin had called Yoochun that pet name when the emotional man was on the verge of tears. He never could understand how such a small child could be so full of water. Yoochun was steered away from the dancing bodies by his best friend and the two went off to find the eldest in the crowded house.
“Couldn’t you have thrown him a bone Junsu? Maybe he’s gotten better.” Junsu shot Yunho an incredulous look. “Changmin says he has been practicing in his bedroom all the time.” Yunho continued, and Junsu’s heart sank before walking off the dance floor.
“Where are you going?”
“I need a drink.” The response was shouted over the retreating shoulder.
Yunho sighed and ran a hand through his sweaty hair. There went his exciting night with Changmin. His boyfriend was so focused on his best friend all the time and he had the balls to question his picture of Jaejoong topless on his cell phone. Changmin had his hands on Yoochun all the time! God I need a shot of something. With that Yunho was off to trail after Junsu in a search of alcohol.
“I wish you’d stop calling me that. Water melon makes it sound like I’m bloated” Yoochun whined, scrubbing at his face before scrunching it up at the thought of having to be rolled everywhere due to waterlogged-ness. Changmin laughed, knowing exactly what was going through his friend's mind, conjuring up images much like a blueberry filled Violet Beauregarde.
Jaejoong was found in the kitchen, red plastic cup in hand and huddled together with hosts and best friends Leeteuk and Heechul, cousins Sungmin and Jungmin, and Zhoumi the foreign exchange student corrupted by Heechul.
“Tokki!” Jaejoong exclaimed, hands thrown in the air and drink sloshing dangerously in its plastic confinement.
Yoochun and Changmin face palmed. Jaejoong was already drunk. The man could drink his fair share and enjoyed testing his limits much to Yoochun’s everyone’s chagrin.
“There goes out designated driver,” Changmin muttered under his breath, loud enough for only Yoochun to hear.
“I don’t even know why we all agreed to that - or why he even volunteered!”
“We took Yunho’s old convertible, since we are spending the night at his place.” Jaejoong and Yunho grew up next door to each other and Jae had been coveting that mustang for 4 years since the beginning of their senior year of high school.
“Why did Yunho agree to that?” Yoochun asked, watching Jaejoong talk animatedly, the cup in his wildly moving hands keeping everyone around him alert through their alcohol induced hazes.
“He did it to get back at me.”
“Are you guys still fighting about that stupid picture? It was a dare!”
“Why didn’t he delete it then?”
“In case of emergencies?” Yoochun tried to joke but only received a glare in response. “What, it did end up helping him out.” He wanted to comfort his friend who was always there for him. “Jae is still getting calls from “freaky art perverts” so maybe Yunho was trying to make it up to him by letting Jae finally drive his car tonight.”
Changmin and Yunho were stuck in a deadlock ever since Changmin found out about Yunho being in possession of a scandalous photo of Jaejoong. This led to an argument about their relationships with their respective bffs and now the two were on edge with each other. Changmin was upset because he hated how badly this was affecting him. Yunho was his first boyfriend - and was his crush for the past few years. He just didn’t know how to get over it. Changmin grabbed a hold of the chatting Jaejoong, pried the drink from the older man’s hands and drank its contents down in one shot. He then shoved Jae towards his friend.
“Go comfort Yoochun, I need to drink more of this stuff.” He shook the cup in his hand as he looked around for more of that fruity concoction.
“Tokki!” Jae exclaimed once more, and now without a drink in his hands he threw his arms around his boyfriend. “Waz wrung mai yoomy flooffy bunnyz?” The slur was heavy.
After pulling the man back and steadying him, Yoochun replied. “Junsu wouldn’t dance with me Joongie.” He wanted to pout but his worry for the state of his boyfriend had him creasing his brow.
“Shhhhhh.” Jae smoothed a finger of the other’s forehead. “Joongie will dansh with his yoomiest flooffiest bunnyz.”
Though he was startled by his intoxicated boyfriend’s sudden and rough tug back towards the dancing area, he couldn’t help but grin. Drunken Jaejoong was his hero.
Yunho and Junsu were sitting on the floor behind the couch in the roped off “do not enter” formal sitting room surround by empty bottle of tequila and beer cans. Yunho hated that Changmin was so hot and cold with him. That kiss tonight was the first action he’s gotten in days. His plan to seduce his grouchy boyfriend with his sexy dancing was ruined by Junsu and Yoochun. Those bastards.
“Junsu-ah, you’re a bastard. Like a really bb-ug-big one.” Yunho informed his friend.
“Wai? He can’t no dance good. I was protecting him from his own, his own, his own body. Besides you’re the bastard who keeps photos of Joongie’s nip-nipples on your phone” Junsu explained.
“No. No, nonono. You’re a bastard ‘casue you *hiccup* ruined my sexy dance time with my Chang-Chang *hiccup* Changmin.”
“Yunho, I think you have have had you had enoughs to drink” Junsu turned to the man who was shaking his head furiously in disagreement and slapped a hand painfully onto Yunho’s shoulder thus sending Yunho to fall over on his side and Junsu tumbling after - already passed out.
“Good talk,” Yunho mumbled as they cuddled into each other’s warm bodies to sleep off the drinks.
Drunken Jaejoong’s idea of dancing was a mix between being sinfully delicious and just a sin against dance. But whatever gyrating move the man was doing with his hips had lifted the spirits of a now twirling and shaking Yoochun. As much fun as Yoochun was finally having at this stupid party (and on the dance floor no less) he realized that he was missing something, or rather someone.
“Joongie, do you see Su anywhere?” He shouted over the music. Jaejoong stopped his dancing; the fact that Junsu was missing shocked his drunken mind. Without a word Jaejoong tugged Yoochun off the dance floor and off to search for their lost boyfriend.
It was the high pitched, girl-like scream that alerted them that Changmin may be in trouble. They followed the sound and found a hyperventilating Changmin sitting on the couch of the formal sitting room.
Yoochun crouched in front of the upset man. “Minnie, I don’t think we are supposed to be in here. Why don’t we head back to the kitchen and get you some water, ne?” This was one of the rare times Yoochun had seen his best friend drunk.
“Behind!” Gasped Changmin. “Behind the couch!” Yoochun looked over to Jaejoong for help with Changmin when he realized Jae was standing behind the couch, cell phone out and taking pictures.
“It’s the most hideous thing I have ever seen!” Changmin continued. Yoochun got up and circled around the couch to see Yunho and Junsu spooning, obviously passed out.
“Oh boy, they are not going to be able to look at each other after they wake up.” Yoochun sighed. Why did all his friends have to get drunk before him?
“Our SuSu is so cute snugglin’ our Yunnies!” Jaejoong cooed.
“He’s my Yunnies!” Changmin shot up from the couch and rush to Yunho, throwing the unconscious man over his shoulder. “Yoochun get his keys from Jae and drive us home. My baby is going to have a hangover and a stiff back if I don’t get him in his bed,” ordered a now surprisingly lucid Changmin. He then turned and carted the man off.
Junsu reached out for the now missing heat from his little spoon. “Mmmmmrrrrrrruuuufffff. Tokki? Joongies?” Junsu whined, still half asleep and wanting a cuddle. Jaejoong happily obliged and threw himself on the floor to wrap Junsu up in his arms and legs in a full body hug.
“Pabos!” Yoochun huffed under his breath. “Joongie, get up, it’s time to go back to Yunho’s.” Jae shook his head and pouted petulantly, hugging a now giggling Junsu tighter. Yoochun sighed and knelt next to Jae to search his pockets for the keys to Yunho’s car.
“Tokki that tickles!” Jae chuckled. After minutes of struggling with Jae who had decided that this was a game and began to roll around on the floor, Yoochun held the keys up in victory.
“Alright, up we go Joongie. SuSu.” The two men struggled to get up but Jaejoong, being a regularly heavy drinker, was the better off of the pair. “Jae go on to the car and make sure Min and Yunho are still alive and not having sex on the hood of Yunho’s car. I’m going to help SuSu walk.” Jaejoong giggled at the mention of the word ‘sex’ and then saluted Yoochun and skipped off, a little wobbly, to find his friends.
As the last two walked down the sidewalk towards the car Junsu cleared his throat and turned to speak to Yoochun to the best of his abilities in his current inebriated state. “I’m sorry Tokki, I didn’t know yous were practicing to get better at the dancing. Next party I will boogie with you all all ni-ni- *hiccup* nights.” Junsu apologized to his boyfriend who now had his thin arms wrapped securely around him.
Yoochun didn’t know how Junsu knew he had been trying to teach himself to dance but he bet his best friend/roommate had something to do with it. “I forgive you Junsu, I can’t stay mad at you. I hate it more when you do this to yourself” he left out the “and leave me to be sober” part.
“Oh Tokki! You’re so shexy when you’re cheesy.” Junsu said as he leered at his boyfriend through lidded eyes. “Gimme a kissh!” he made grabby hands at Yoochun’s cheeks and pinched them hard as he leaned in with puckered lips.
That was only the beginning of the stage of drunkenness know as lecherous Junsu.
At the Present.
“I’m invariably aroused in your presence.” Junsu’s voice was muffled as he pressed his mouth against the Yoochun’s long neck.
“You really need to stop with your word of the day calendars.” He huffed, trying to push the man away from sucking on his neck, but not too harshly that his drunken body teetered off its center and on to the ground.
“Come on Chunnie, show me just a little bit of skin!” Junsu played with the hem of Yoochun’s shirt. As he continued to pull Junsu along while slapping away roaming hands he could hear his friends singing in the distance.
“Min-ah! I need your help, he’s gone perverted!” Yoochun said as Junsu started to hump his leg a little bit.
“Get Jae to help you, Changmin is busy!” Yunho yelled.
He could see the two on the hood of the car kissing and Jaejoong was sitting on the ground leaning against the vehicle, passed out. “Bastard!” Yoochun yelled out.
“Bastard!” Jaejoong mimicked, head shooting up before it fell back down.
“Minnie-ah, please!” Yoochun wailed as Junsu had pinned Yoochun to a car only two down from where the others were, tears threatening to fall again. He did not want to make out with a drunken Junsu against a stranger’s dirty car in front of his friends. Plus the guy was getting really heavy.
“My little water melon!” Changmin freed himself from Yunho’s embrace and flew to his best friends aide; knocking Junsu out cold.
“Bastard!” Yunho yelled out but was ignored.
“Thanks Minnie, you know how I hate to use violence against my own boyfriends.” The two friends picked up no-longer-lecherous Junsu and threw him in the back seat along with Jaejoong.
Yunho was pouting. If Yoochun was driving then that meant that Changmin got to ride shot gun and he would have to be in the back with the two unconscious men. God he hoped no one vomited in his car; that would really just make his night. Stupid Changmin, stupid Yoochun stupid -
“Owner gets shot gun!” Yoochun yelled as he climbed into the front seat.
“I’ve always liked you Yoochun.” Yunho said and stuck a tongue out at Changmin before jumping into his convertible.
“Bastard!” Changmin yelled, but was ignored as well and stuffed his long-legged form into the back seat without further complaint. When he settled uncomfortably in the back he caught the eyebrow wiggle and head nod from his friend in the rear-view mirror, motioning to his traitor of a boyfriend. Yunho was smiling for the first time that night. Yoochun grinned triumphantly.
As Changmin spoons a very sated Yunho on the futon of his basement later that night he thinks about how Yoochun's one small act of goodwill had eased Yunho's worries about their relationship. Drifting into the world of sleep, Changmin's last thought is, God damn, Yoochun is a bastard.
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