Update! I have time because...schooooooool's....out..for... the winter! Yep. I sang it as I typed it
I'm so happy classes are over!
My grades=
A
A
A
B
..the B could've been an A- if the professor was nice, which he clearly wasn't.. clearly.. heh
Timmy came and hung out with me the other day (the 18th). It was so much fun! There was a Blockbuster visit, trespassing, dvds (Saved & Elf), nailing of my sister's shelves, tons of talking, and of course.. pie with cool whip. The black raspberry pie was amazing and the whole night was just great. I really hope we can hang out soon because he's one of the nicest and funnest people I know :) Thanks for everything Timmy.
Joey took off work yesterday to spend more time with me and he and I made a huge dent in my Christmas shopping. Also (thanks to him), we took my car in to finally get my brakes fixed. I also got 2 new tires and rotors (whatever those are.. I don't know.. but I needed them!) My brake pads were completely gone so whenever I'd brake it was just metal on metal grinding.. It was so scary.. My foot would actually shake while I would brake and there'd be a low, deep grinding noise.. I'm soooo happy it's fixed. Over $220 bucks spent by my mom to keep me safe.. Am I worth that? Hmm..
I bought a bunch of stuff at Best Buy (discount yaaaaaaay Joey) & Target and Joey and I had Panera Bread and amazing pizza and cheese sticks later at his cousin's house. We ate the pizza while watching "The Biggest Loser" show with chubby people on it.. hah.. It was all great.. I'm so happy I got some of my shopping done! :)
Overall, I've been in a better mood lately. I'm going to start working again soon so hopefully that'll improve my confidence too. I've been a little confused about some things but I think that's all normal. I hope I get things figured out soon.. Too bad we can't see the future, right? Or at least have some kind of idea about it all...
Maybe I just need a good smack in the face.. I feel like I shouldn't worry though. Time will show what'll happen naturally and what's best for me.
Lately I've been realizing how important trust is for a relationship to work. This issue has made me question every relationship I've been in and I'm always either a.) scared/worried or b.) a hypocrite (which is rare)
I think I often enter relationships right away feeling like I'll never be enough for them.. just me alone.. and maybe that will always be the case.. so I should just learn to deal with it.. because it's so hard believing what guys will say. In the past, it's been so hard hearing the word "love" because how can you love someone if there's uncertainty? I'm such a hypocrite though. I've been on the other end saying the words while questioning it.. So I don't have room to talk. I've learned I have a hard time trusting people. I just want to know I can trust what the person I'm with says and know that it's meant to be. I'd say I'm happy right now.
I don't even know why I went off on this topic.. It's just on my mind.
Of course brains, humor, caring, affection, etc. are all also very important to me.. but I'm just now starting to realize that I'm a jealous person. Maybe I get jealous because of my difficulty with trusting. I can't read peoples' minds and it's hard for me to believe what they say at times because I've been cheated on.. but then again.. where do people draw the line with cheating? I think I'm getting better though. Maybe a lot of it though isn't jealousy.. Maybe it's just the way all humans should feel if they really care about who they're with. In an ideal situation, a person of the opposite sex would never (ever) enter the mind as being anything more than a friend.. but this is RARELY the case.. which makes me hate myself, (in the past, the person I was dating), and society sometimes. This brings my mind back to the question- where do we draw the line with cheating? Is it okay to fantasize? Even for a second? To send/receive dirty pictures? To cuddle? To sleep next to someone of the opposite sex? Sorry I'm rambling but now I'm going through thinking about past boyfriends and looking at reasons to why I feel the way I do.
I'm gonna go eat, take a shower, clean a little, and spend another night at Joey's.
Happy Holidays. BIG friggin snow coming tonight. Woopie!
Can you understand my meaning hidden in the roses around my eyes
I want you to know how much it means to have you in my life
Your love brings me close again in this instance when our worlds collide
The wire of eternity twists around us, I can feel this river rising, moving up my back
Some things never change, some things never go away
I could never forget you, and I will never be the same
-"Collision"- As I Lay Dying
My grades=
A
A
A
B
..the B could've been an A- if the professor was nice, which he clearly wasn't.. clearly.. heh
Timmy came and hung out with me the other day (the 18th). It was so much fun! There was a Blockbuster visit, trespassing, dvds (Saved & Elf), nailing of my sister's shelves, tons of talking, and of course.. pie with cool whip. The black raspberry pie was amazing and the whole night was just great. I really hope we can hang out soon because he's one of the nicest and funnest people I know :) Thanks for everything Timmy.
Joey took off work yesterday to spend more time with me and he and I made a huge dent in my Christmas shopping. Also (thanks to him), we took my car in to finally get my brakes fixed. I also got 2 new tires and rotors (whatever those are.. I don't know.. but I needed them!) My brake pads were completely gone so whenever I'd brake it was just metal on metal grinding.. It was so scary.. My foot would actually shake while I would brake and there'd be a low, deep grinding noise.. I'm soooo happy it's fixed. Over $220 bucks spent by my mom to keep me safe.. Am I worth that? Hmm..
I bought a bunch of stuff at Best Buy (discount yaaaaaaay Joey) & Target and Joey and I had Panera Bread and amazing pizza and cheese sticks later at his cousin's house. We ate the pizza while watching "The Biggest Loser" show with chubby people on it.. hah.. It was all great.. I'm so happy I got some of my shopping done! :)
Overall, I've been in a better mood lately. I'm going to start working again soon so hopefully that'll improve my confidence too. I've been a little confused about some things but I think that's all normal. I hope I get things figured out soon.. Too bad we can't see the future, right? Or at least have some kind of idea about it all...
Maybe I just need a good smack in the face.. I feel like I shouldn't worry though. Time will show what'll happen naturally and what's best for me.
Lately I've been realizing how important trust is for a relationship to work. This issue has made me question every relationship I've been in and I'm always either a.) scared/worried or b.) a hypocrite (which is rare)
I think I often enter relationships right away feeling like I'll never be enough for them.. just me alone.. and maybe that will always be the case.. so I should just learn to deal with it.. because it's so hard believing what guys will say. In the past, it's been so hard hearing the word "love" because how can you love someone if there's uncertainty? I'm such a hypocrite though. I've been on the other end saying the words while questioning it.. So I don't have room to talk. I've learned I have a hard time trusting people. I just want to know I can trust what the person I'm with says and know that it's meant to be. I'd say I'm happy right now.
I don't even know why I went off on this topic.. It's just on my mind.
Of course brains, humor, caring, affection, etc. are all also very important to me.. but I'm just now starting to realize that I'm a jealous person. Maybe I get jealous because of my difficulty with trusting. I can't read peoples' minds and it's hard for me to believe what they say at times because I've been cheated on.. but then again.. where do people draw the line with cheating? I think I'm getting better though. Maybe a lot of it though isn't jealousy.. Maybe it's just the way all humans should feel if they really care about who they're with. In an ideal situation, a person of the opposite sex would never (ever) enter the mind as being anything more than a friend.. but this is RARELY the case.. which makes me hate myself, (in the past, the person I was dating), and society sometimes. This brings my mind back to the question- where do we draw the line with cheating? Is it okay to fantasize? Even for a second? To send/receive dirty pictures? To cuddle? To sleep next to someone of the opposite sex? Sorry I'm rambling but now I'm going through thinking about past boyfriends and looking at reasons to why I feel the way I do.
I'm gonna go eat, take a shower, clean a little, and spend another night at Joey's.
Happy Holidays. BIG friggin snow coming tonight. Woopie!
Can you understand my meaning hidden in the roses around my eyes
I want you to know how much it means to have you in my life
Your love brings me close again in this instance when our worlds collide
The wire of eternity twists around us, I can feel this river rising, moving up my back
Some things never change, some things never go away
I could never forget you, and I will never be the same
-"Collision"- As I Lay Dying