Brainspew
Today was an odd day. Strange combinations of productivity and sloshy-ness... Bursts of mural work, and house-work and chores. And then an span of 2 hours that I just let myself sit and read. Let myself enjoy the flow of words and images, of dancing storms, and fluttering canvas in my head.
I have been have twinges, in my chest, and in my wrist all day.. I think it is the anxiety again. I am considering finding a doctor here, but get more anxious when I think about that. Money is tight right now and the dog needs a vet visit first. But then I have a bit of a respite. I planted my late started tomato seedlings (first batch died). I took a couple hours to read my book. I sat and watched the sun set. And the spans of furious productivity that stretched the rest of the day included moving some random material away from where I spread wildflower seeds. Taking a carload of stuff to goodwill. Last minute (and stressful) shipping from a customer who got back to me after 4 months with a shipping address, making a ton of stock, and then making soup, in the process using every freaking pot in the kitchen. And now... neck spasms... again... and my wrist is bothering me. So I think a bath is in order.
I feel strangely lyrical this evening. I want to write about doors and corridors, entrances and alleyways... a side path to a land that is half forgotten, mostly shadowed. There is something tickling the edge of my creativity. Just nudging... teasing... whispering in the dark, from around a corner. Always around a corner. And I can't force it into focus. So, I think, a bath... and maybe that will settle the shaking and chattering in my find.. let me find that hidden path so I can see the shape of the thing in that shadowed alleyway, I don't know if its art, I kind of think it may be writing...
I wonder...
I have been have twinges, in my chest, and in my wrist all day.. I think it is the anxiety again. I am considering finding a doctor here, but get more anxious when I think about that. Money is tight right now and the dog needs a vet visit first. But then I have a bit of a respite. I planted my late started tomato seedlings (first batch died). I took a couple hours to read my book. I sat and watched the sun set. And the spans of furious productivity that stretched the rest of the day included moving some random material away from where I spread wildflower seeds. Taking a carload of stuff to goodwill. Last minute (and stressful) shipping from a customer who got back to me after 4 months with a shipping address, making a ton of stock, and then making soup, in the process using every freaking pot in the kitchen. And now... neck spasms... again... and my wrist is bothering me. So I think a bath is in order.
I feel strangely lyrical this evening. I want to write about doors and corridors, entrances and alleyways... a side path to a land that is half forgotten, mostly shadowed. There is something tickling the edge of my creativity. Just nudging... teasing... whispering in the dark, from around a corner. Always around a corner. And I can't force it into focus. So, I think, a bath... and maybe that will settle the shaking and chattering in my find.. let me find that hidden path so I can see the shape of the thing in that shadowed alleyway, I don't know if its art, I kind of think it may be writing...
I wonder...