tengo una vida muy loca
my life is good. but confusing. tiring. a little crazy. but for the most part, i enjoy it. sort of. i have no idea where i'm going...i don't really know where i am. this could get interesting.
i'm getting excited about being in new york this summer. i think there are a series of obvious reasons, but i think my recent excitement is that i'm just very ready to get away from it all and be totally alone with God. it's funny that i'm going to one of the biggest cities in the world and looking forward to the anonymity; most people hate that. but every spring i get this feeling of exhaustion and frustration that i have now. and it's just at the end of winter/ beginning of spring when the weather is not quite consistently sunshiney. i just want to get away. i'm very much looking forward to spring break. i haven't really stopped long enough to realize how much i miss home. i guess that's good, though, since i haven't really had much of an opportunity to go home yet this semester.
speaking of spring break, i'm mucho excited about going to the beach. the plan is to go home for a few days, then head to some wonderful florida beachy place. sand, sun, bathing suit...what more could i want, you ask? oh shutup, who asks a dumb question like that anyway.
though life is looking up right now, that does not mean that there is no element of confusion going on in my mind. my mom told me the other night that all the romanticized, idealized elements of life would never happen to me because i think too much. geeze. talk about a downer. but i'm working on it all. which is another reason i'm looking forward to being in new york; i feel like it will be a great time for me to really be me...or to figure out (more) who that is. just when i get comfortable in my own skin, something uproots it all. how frustrating.
"Give me understanding, that I may keep your law and observe it with my whole heart. Lead me in the path of your commandments, for I delight in it. Incline my heart to your testimonies, and not to selfish gain! Turn my eyes from looking at worthless things; and give me life in your ways. Confirm to your servant your promise, that you may be feared. Turn away the reproach that I dread, for your rules are good. Behold, I long for your precepts; in you righteousness, give me life!" Psalm 119:34-40
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