(no subject)
wow. god I'm an idiot. here was my goal: keep on good terms with jessie, and just have fun with it. here's what happened: I blew up about something that didn't exist. now, not only are things are falling into pieces, I've taken something that looked carefree, and pushed into the f'ing toilet. I think I need to stop while I'm behind. my bad, jess.
today has been freaking unbelievably impossible to keep under control. working today, has made every part of my body ache so bad that I can't wait until tomorrow. I probably moved single-handedly at least 20 large trees. this doesn't sound like much, but considering how freaking heavy madronna is, and how many times sharp sticks jammed into my body, and my legs threating to cramp up into a ball every step I took, I think I did pretty well. I love doing stuff like that, I have this mentality where the harder I push myself, the more I can handle tomorrow. and the next. I think that's why I got so pissed off today. literally, I was worn out completely, and I just didn't have any patience to think about anything worthwhile.
today has been freaking unbelievably impossible to keep under control. working today, has made every part of my body ache so bad that I can't wait until tomorrow. I probably moved single-handedly at least 20 large trees. this doesn't sound like much, but considering how freaking heavy madronna is, and how many times sharp sticks jammed into my body, and my legs threating to cramp up into a ball every step I took, I think I did pretty well. I love doing stuff like that, I have this mentality where the harder I push myself, the more I can handle tomorrow. and the next. I think that's why I got so pissed off today. literally, I was worn out completely, and I just didn't have any patience to think about anything worthwhile.