fill in to last post...
i love cat power... ok last post:
i posted: i fucking hate life...or something like that. i didnt go into detail because it was really late and i was lazy and didnt really feel like typing... i did write a blog on my "space" ... posted below for your reading pleasure:
12:34 PM - an update on my fucking amazing life
Current mood:
betrayed
Category: Life
so i quit smoking and i am doing really great with it sunday will be 3 weeks strong and a gift for my quitting my husband has started back up with it... he thinks that it will make me love him more because smoking makes him more of a man!
i have a lovely bladder infection and it feels great. i am emotionally totally numb and i really thought about cutting tonight ... i thought that it might make me the weak person my husband ask for me to be ... he says i am cold and heartless so doing it would put me in a place of total insanity and really what would it matter. this life has nothing to offer. the bridges have burned and the life is a dead end anyways ...
fuck it who cares.
now please take in mind i am not cutting and even though i thought about it i wouldnt but for those of you who dont know much about self mutalation it is an addiction so there are alway thoughts but it is if you act on them that matter...
ok well last night my husband decided that he is going to quit smoking all together ie: hooka,cigars, and ciggerettes! so that makes me really happy and i officially love him 100% once again...even though it was a cock face thing to start smoking like that i forgive him and i hope he does as well as i am...
and since i am updating i just wanted to put it out there i really want to go "home" this week the feeling of need is strong ... i miss a lot of people tha are so far away and i wish i could hug them... i miss you guys <3